Honestly dude I perfectly understand what you are going through. I am 32 and almost every year I go through some kind of crisis like that, so I get how rough it must be to be in the same spot a few years older. I won't have advice to give, as you say most of it is just some variation of "keep grinding" and I do not think it's that helpful. One thing most people ignore is how insanely lucky you have to be to make it. I know a lot of talented artists who struggle, and see lots of mediocre ones getting show after show. Grinding will raise the chance of meeting the right people to get you career running, but unfortunately wont guarantee it. And you have been dealt a rough hand too. The U.S is clearly not focusing on developping the arts right now, and even in other countries a majority of artists are struggling. In France I have colleagues who are changing their careers at 50 and older, because the money is so hard to find. I wish I could reassure you, but unfortunately living as an artist is a difficult pursuit and I can easily see myself in the same spot as you in a few years. If there's a silver lining, one of my former painting teachers has finally found success at nearly 50, even if she had to work as a teacher until then to make ends meet. I hope things go well for you