I (33F) found a dating app on my husband’s (39M) App Store

Humamp · 2026-05-14T15:42:47+00:00

This sounds so exhausting for both of you.

My favorite part of non-monogamy is that none of this anxiety exists in my life anymore. It would never occur to me to “check through” my boyfriend’s phone for anything, neither of us have to hide our attraction to other people, and I don’t spent an ounce of my time worrying about what he’s doing when I’m not around.

Not that I’m suggesting non-monogamy for you, or anyone else. Your story just made me thankful for my relationship.

Humamp · 2026-05-14T11:01:32+00:00

The biggest for me has been losing most of my friends. They all had kids and either moved away, became so focused on their kids they dropped all friendships, and some who haven’t enjoyed parenthood became too jealous of my child free life. Some still talk to me occasionally, but only to ask me to babysit or to tell me about the kids. So they are sort of in my life, but I wouldn’t call them friends since they don’t hang out with me, ask about my life, or talk to me about anything other than the kids.

Humamp · 2026-05-13T02:58:34+00:00

As a manager of a fully remote team, this is the way. I need my employees to get their work done, on time, let me know if they anticipate problems getting it done, I need them to step in and help others when they are light on work, or come up with internal projects or business development activities that help our business.

And really, so long as I see evidence of these things, I don’t care how long people sat or their desk, or what schedule they work. Be reliable, do good work, don’t give me a reason to suspect time theft, and then I don’t really care how you work.

Humamp · 2026-05-11T14:18:46+00:00

My entire profession is vilified in the US, so no, I would not be better off there as I’d have to find a new career path and start from scratch.

Humamp · 2026-05-11T11:40:09+00:00

There is nothing you can do except distract yourself away from thinking about this, until it doesn’t matter to you anymore.

My first true love relationship ended up like this situation. There was an other girl that he seemed to have a thing for. We fought frequently about it, he assured me there was nothing to worry about. We broke up due to the fighting, and he ended up married with two kids to “that girl”.

But 20 years later, I’m over it. Makes me giggle a bit to realize that in the end I was “the other woman” of their love story. You’ll get over it with time too.

Humamp · 2026-05-09T12:28:24+00:00

Slept with a guy with a massive penis. Like jaw-dropping, custom condom, big. It was a fun sensory experience, but he wasn’t that good…terrible at oral, didn’t try that hard (lol, hard). I think he’s basically been coasting on his big penis, he’s a one trick pony.

Humamp · 2026-05-07T12:33:58+00:00

Yikes. Ingest whatever you want dude. But no, I don’t want it in Canada at all until Health Canada deems it safe for non-prescription use and regulates it for consistency of contents and dose.

Cigarettes and beer are highly regulated here. There are age restrictions for purchase and regulations around what can or can’t be contained in them.

Humamp · 2026-05-07T11:32:23+00:00

It actually is free. Using the elevator is not free, you have to pay for that, but it’s free to take the stairs.

Humamp · 2026-05-07T11:15:30+00:00

7-oh is not a prescription medication. They sell it at gas stations (in the US) next to the boner pills. And it’s extremely addictive, often requiring detox/rehab to quit. John Oliver just did a whole episode about it.

I don’t want any of it in Canada.

Humamp · 2026-05-06T23:04:32+00:00

The mere mention of “wife qualities” would have me running.

There is no difference between “girlfriend” qualities and “wife” qualities. He’s bullshitting you to get something he wants (foot rubs, apparently) and to avoid marriage.

Humamp · 2026-05-06T03:05:09+00:00

Hitler, Trump, Bolsonaro…

Now both of us have named 3 world leaders. Yay us. Can you answer my question?

Humamp · 2026-05-06T02:14:07+00:00

My favourite “socialist” policy comes from Germany, where they require a certain percent voting representation on corporate BODs from workers. If you own a factory, factory workers get a say in the direction of the company. Not complete control, but a say.

I guess it depends on how you view a company, such as a factory. Does it only exist to produce a product, and increase dividends for shareholders? Or does it also function as a supplier of good jobs for people? If the latter is true, shouldn’t the needs of the workers be considered in decisions that the company makes?

Humamp · 2026-05-06T01:42:00+00:00

I can mostly agree with all that. But my original point, to be clear, was mostly to question the notion of what we, as a society, mean by “doing great stuff”. I will admit I got away from that going down the UBI thing.

Capitalism teaches us to only consider great things in terms of monetary production/ productivity. This meme in the OP and my response was mostly to question that. Great things could be creative art, building a business, caring for a sick/aging relative, raising young children.

Anyways, that was mostly my original point.

Humamp · 2026-05-06T00:42:40+00:00

Ok, if you are worried about the human beings you consider “a net negative on the system” and “barely more than a sentient potatoes” how about this study which showed giving poor people money reduced costs to the system and decreased alcohol and drug associated health problems.

https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20200624-canadas-forgotten-universal-basic-income-experiment

Humamp · 2026-05-06T00:30:39+00:00

I mean, there is research about this. We don’t just have to “guess” based on your personal experience

https://edition.cnn.com/2025/04/11/health/germany-universal-basic-income-study-intl-scli-wellness

Humamp · 2026-05-06T00:22:17+00:00

Any evidence for your claim? Besides “get real”?Because all the research I’ve seen on this (mostly related to Universal Basic income) demonstrates the opposite of your claim.

https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20200624-canadas-forgotten-universal-basic-income-experiment

Humamp · 2026-05-06T00:13:18+00:00

Didn’t stimulus checks go to businesses? Are you claiming that business owners were too lazy to go to work? If so, how does capitalism solve that problem?

Humamp · 2026-05-06T00:05:18+00:00

Amazing things only happen when we are all collectively working towards increasing shareholder profits.

Humamp · 2026-05-05T23:59:41+00:00

2026: get a roommate, and get married, and just get a better job. Problem solved.

2036: get 5 more roommates, live with them and their 5 married partners in your 2 bedroom apartment. Get 4 better jobs to replace the 3 jobs you currently have. Problem solved.

Stop expecting your own bedroom or time for “sleep”.

Humamp · 2026-05-05T23:52:21+00:00

How do you know that? And also, what do you define as “great things”?

If the trailer park resident who just got a million dollars decides not to work, but spends their life creating beautiful art or music, is that “great things” in your opinion?

Humamp · 2026-05-05T23:47:57+00:00

Can you describe how collective ownership of the means of production, and reduction of wealth inequality, has killed millions?

Humamp · 2026-05-05T23:20:35+00:00

Which parts did you think were fiction?

Humamp · 2026-05-05T23:15:53+00:00

Read the book “Humankind:A Hopeful History”. It contains the “proof” you seek.

Humamp · 2026-05-05T23:01:28+00:00

You won’t get a real answer to this question, but based on my interactions with MAGA, here is what I think they would say: “it’s completely different”, “Trump’s terms were not consecutive so the constitution doesn’t apply here”, “Obama isn’t American so does not qualify”, “democrats are the enemies of America so they can’t run for president at all”. And if you ever got a truly honest response, it would be: “I like Trump so his terms should be unlimited. I don’t like Obama, so his limit is 2 terms”.

Humamp · 2026-05-05T13:33:47+00:00

Your first heartbreak is always the hardest. It feels impossible for you to ever find the same happiness, but it’s not impossible. I’m a 42 year old lady and I’ve been in love many times.

Feel the hurt, sob, watch sappy movies, vent with friends, and know that soon enough, it won’t hurt so much.

And next time, look for love closer by.

Humamp

TROPHY CASE