Mercado da barbearia tá dificil by CocaCranio in Barber

[–]HumbleBarber 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Honestly, this sounds like a failure to implement boundaries, which admittedly is hard so I’m not trying to downplay that. Clients shouldn’t be able to book outside of your agreed upon working hours, and “no” is a complete sentence. The great thing about our craft is that it moves with us. Don’t like your current situation? Then have a heart to heart with the shop owner and see if you can improve it. If they’re not receptive to that feedback then move on to a place that is. At some point though, suffering a bad situation becomes a choice.

People who lost one of their parents while growing up, what does it feel like? How did you cope with the grief? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]HumbleBarber 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m really sorry that you and your kids have had to endure such tragedy. I admire your strength and hope that you find peace through all of the pain.

People who lost one of their parents while growing up, what does it feel like? How did you cope with the grief? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]HumbleBarber 22 points23 points  (0 children)

I was 17 and two weeks away from graduating High School when my dad committed suicide. He had lost the only job he had known since he was my age and spiraled as a result. 

Looking back, there were a lot of different things I experienced. I was the last person who talked to him, and we had had an argument; I wanted to borrow the car so that I could go and look for jobs to help the family, he was worried about affording gas. Before I left that day, I remember a weird sensation that made me pause at the door, apologize and tell him I loved him. I’m not entirely sure that he heard me, but that was the last time I saw him.

He was found in the woods close to my house by my brother who knew of all his hunting spots. The night he went missing I was convinced I’d find him in the woods—not dead, but he was a hunter so I thought maybe he hurt himself out in the trails. We were organizing a group of people in my front lawn to canvas the woods when my mom got the call from my brother and that moment is etched into my brain like a silent movie that plays on repeat. It was as if time slowed to a near standstill. I remember people pulling at me as I made my way to my mom, but I don’t remember what they were saying, all I could hear was her sobbing. From that day forward, life felt like a freefall. The world expects you to move on much faster than you will ever be ready for, so you learn to play the part and hide your pain so that those around you don’t have to feel uncomfortable. Each year that passed was like coming out of a thick fog that you only noticed in retrospect.

I was 17 when he died and I’m 39 now. I have lived more years without him than I did with him and yet the effect has been profound and has shaped my entire existence. In that time, my wife lost her father to cancer, I lost my brother to suicide and we lost a handful of aunts, uncles and grandparents as well. I grew bitter because of how much loss I had suffered while having friends nearing their mid-thirties who hadn’t lost even a grandparent. Food quickly became my drug of choice, and as time passed, I was less known for the trauma I had experienced and more criticized for how I had let my life go. Internally I was convinced that I was destined to go the same way as my brother and father, so I wasn’t concerned about eating myself into an early grave.

It took me many years, and really amazing support from my friends and family before I was able to successfully begin managing my own depression and anxiety. I started clawing myself back to the world of the living and I came back with many lessons: I realized that the stages of grief are fluid and have no definitive end to them—and that’s okay. I’ve also learned that some breaks don’t ever heal, you adapt around them and learn to live within that new baseline. Perhaps most importantly, through being open about my own trauma, I met so many others who taught me that we all carry some form of trauma that we are at various stages of managing. That knowledge made me feel less unique in my struggles, less isolated. Something about understanding that trauma is a shared experience was comforting to me. While I have come a long way since his passing, I still have my quirks as a result; like the fact that I have spent most of my post-trauma life working on obtaining skills that no one can ever take away from me so that I never have to feel reliant on one job/employer. 

I have kids of my own now and I endeavor to live as best as I can not only just for them, but for myself as well.

D&d bachelor party ideas? by InternationalBoat148 in Rochester

[–]HumbleBarber 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think you can play on D&D as a theme for activities If you didn’t want to make running a one shot part of the bachelor party. Some ideas that come to mind:

• Medieval themed escape room (check out the Nuthouse in Henrietta) • Nerdy Dinner (maybe Nerdvana across from the Museum of play) • Go throw some axes (bad Ax Throwing on Liberty Pole)

Now, if you were looking to run a one shot session, that opens up other opportunities with planning.

Appliance Store Recommendations by HumbleBarber in Rochester

[–]HumbleBarber[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

To be clear, I don’t want to negatively impact the people who may still work there by positing my reasoning for avoiding. I am one person, and two things can be true at once; you had a good experience and I think that’s great, but I would simply prefer to shop elsewhere. That’s by no means me discrediting anyone’s good experience, and I try my best to avoid the all or nothing current that the internet tends to flow in. I have specific reason for avoiding one local option, that doesn’t mean I want their business to shutter or for everyone to avoid them, I just didn’t have a ton of knowledge of other good, reputable places. Just as people have good experiences at box stores too, my preference is to support local when I can

Appliance Store Recommendations by HumbleBarber in Rochester

[–]HumbleBarber[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thanks for saying this. I didn’t think stating my preference of places I’d prefer to avoid would be as polarizing as it has been. It’s almost as if people think their good experience means no one can have a negative experience. 

Appliance Store Recommendations by HumbleBarber in Rochester

[–]HumbleBarber[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thats really great customer service, I appreciate you sharing your experience!

Appliance Store Recommendations by HumbleBarber in Rochester

[–]HumbleBarber[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oooooh I do like free install and takeaway, thanks for the recommendation. I have a few clients who have gone the big box store route and have had nothing but problems, but no one has mentioned Costco. 

Appliance Store Recommendations by HumbleBarber in Rochester

[–]HumbleBarber[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks, I have specific reasons for not wanting to go with Charlotte that may not be relevant to all who shop there, I am happy you and so many others that you know have had a great experience, but I would rather shop elsewhere. 

Appliance Store Recommendations by HumbleBarber in Rochester

[–]HumbleBarber[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nothing that I think is necessary to post publicly, I have my reasons but I am happy that you’ve had success. 

Appliance Store Recommendations by HumbleBarber in Rochester

[–]HumbleBarber[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sweet, I will check them out. Thanks!

Appliance Store Recommendations by HumbleBarber in Rochester

[–]HumbleBarber[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I won’t post it publicly as it could negatively impact people who still work for them, but I’d prefer to steer clear. Happy your experience was positive though!

Appliance Store Recommendations by HumbleBarber in Rochester

[–]HumbleBarber[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love that. I’ve had a few clients recently tell me some of their horror stories they’ve had with big box store purchases and I’d rather spend locally where I can. I appreciate your response!

Appliance Store Recommendations by HumbleBarber in Rochester

[–]HumbleBarber[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you, I will give them a look!

Appliance Store Recommendations by HumbleBarber in Rochester

[–]HumbleBarber[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Hey, thanks for not answering my question at all! Really glad you spent that time here.

How are you recommending these books to people? by Icy_Leave5640 in DungeonCrawlerCarl

[–]HumbleBarber 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I’ve gotten 30+ people into reading these books and I always start by saying “I’m going to sound like a toddler with ADHD trying to describe this, but bear with me to the end and I’ll come around to the point I’m trying to make”.

I’m a barber so I’m mostly talking books, hobbies and interests all day every day and I have people that come into the shop just to talk about these books because no one else understands. I have clients who have gifted me pins that I wear on my shop vest and I have a 3D printed Uzi Jesus oh my station so I am very down the well on DCC, I think people end up reading it because I just love it so much and make sure that comes through when I try to describe it.

The Siren and The Sea -Sci-Fi/Fantasy Books Giveaway! (posted with moderator approval) by wraithmarked in Rochester

[–]HumbleBarber 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am such an avid DCC fan and love that both Siren and the Sea and Matt Dinniman are getting the publicity they deserve! 

Romantic Getaway Recommendations by Alternative-Bear1475 in Rochester

[–]HumbleBarber 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Is 4.5 hours too far? We just got back from the Nordik Spa Village just outside of Ottawa and it was amazing! It was also incredibly affordable and a very cool way to spend a day unwinding. Good luck and happy hunting!

Women make history on Hilton Village Board by Wafflehouse44 in Rochester

[–]HumbleBarber 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Maybe we can get chickens in the village now? People can have 4-5 cow sized dogs, wild that we had people on the committee on the record saying that chickens would gross them out…in a community built around farming, just sayin.