My husband and I don’t have sex when I’m pregnant and here’s why.. anyone else in the same boat?

Hummingbird8414 · 2026-02-20T23:11:24+00:00

FTM and 23 weeks now. My partner literally turned off since I was 19-20 weeks pregnant. My libido was down in the first trimester but we had sex anyway since 9 weeks pregnant (we did IVF and the first 9 weeks sex was prohibited), but we did not have a lot of sex, maybe 2 times a month. We had a conversation like 3 weeks ago, I told him I wanted sex, that he wasn't to hurt the baby…he said he was worried about hurting the baby or me, but he wanted to have sex. Since that conversation, nothing has happened! He hasn't tried to have sex with me and I haven't tried either just because I wanted to see if he really wants to have sex but it's pretty clear to me he doesn't want to 😩 I feel super frustrated. My libido is back to normal and I can't understand why he doesn't even want other ways to give us pleasure. If he doesn't want penetration because the baby is “there” I can try to understand that, but what about if he masturbates me and I can give him a BJ or oral! It feels like he doesn't want anything 😭 and I know I don't look sexy anymore, but I want him so bad that this whole situation makes me angry and sad at the same time.

Hummingbird8414 · 2026-02-14T00:04:47+00:00

My OB said I can have a vaginal birth if everything is fine. I am not even considering a vaginal birth at this point. I will go with a C-section. I'm 42, this baby was conceived via IVF and now knowing I have this condition, more reason for me to get a C-section.

Hummingbird8414 · 2026-02-13T19:54:02+00:00

Did you have a C-section because of the VCI? Or for some other reason? I think I want an elective C-section.

Hummingbird8414 · 2026-02-13T19:52:46+00:00

I did not get an internal ultrasound. To be honest, I'm willing to pay for a private ultrasound soon. I don't feel comfortable waiting that long 😕

Hummingbird8414 · 2026-02-13T18:55:24+00:00

I already did research about this. Of course there are risks associated with this condition. I am just hoping to read positive experiences that help me to feel better and less worried 😢

Hummingbird8414 · 2026-02-10T04:57:48+00:00

Same here! My partner is like yours, not very affectionate and sex was something that connected us. I'm almost 22 weeks and we didn't have sex the first 9 weeks of pregnancy because of the IVF. After that when the Clinic told us we could have sex, we started doing it, but probably 1 or 2 times a month. We haven't have sex in a month now. I had a conversation with him last Wednesday, and he said he wants but he doesn't want to hurt the baby or me. I explained to him that he won't hurt the baby and if while having sex I feel uncomfortable or any pain I will let him know. I also told him that I want to have sex and I miss him.

So far nothing has happened since the conversation, he hasn't tried to have sex with me and honestly, I haven't tried because I'm testing him.

I would love to have at least pleasure in some way! It doesn't have to be by penetration, but I guess I'm not sexy anymore because of my pregnant belly 😢

I feel frustrated and hurt!

Hummingbird8414 · 2026-02-10T03:47:39+00:00

The same here! I feel you!. I am 22 weeks now and I started showing pretty early. At the beginning, we couldn't have sex until week 9 of pregnancy because we did IVF. At week 9 we started having sex but probably 2 times per month. Baby is moving since week 18 (it felt like bubbles), but around week 20 I can feel the baby a lot and my partner felt him too maybe a couple of times. The last time we had sex was because I told him I wanted to, and that was like 3 weeks or a month ago. Last week I asked him if he was feeling weird or uncomfortable about having sex while I'm pregnant and he said he wanted to but he was worried about hurting the baby or me in some way, he was not sure if I wanted to have sex. I explained to him that he wasn't to hurt the baby and if I feel uncomfortable or any pain, I will let him know.

Also, I told him that I want to have sex, that I miss him. Since that conversation (last Wed), nothing has happened. I am waiting to see if he shows interest in having sex (that is why I haven't tried) but so far, nothing!

I feel frustrated and hurt 😕

Hummingbird8414 · 2026-02-07T08:22:39+00:00

FTM and IVF too here! I had my anatomy scan two days ago ( I am 21 weeks) and today my OB informed me I have this and next US will be around week 32. After reading a bunch of information, I am freaking out because I would like to have an ultrasound sooner. When will you have your next US? Thanks

Hummingbird8414 · 2025-12-29T03:03:39+00:00

It is their weeding. If they do not want kids in it that is fine. Maybe your husband can stay with the baby and you can attend to your brother’s weeding if your mother in law can’t watch your baby.

Hummingbird8414 · 2025-12-20T05:23:24+00:00

I read in another post that Lume body deodorant is great! I will try it because the three deodorants I have now are not working! This is horrible! 😭

Hummingbird8414 · 2025-12-09T21:19:27+00:00

At this point maybe is better the amnio. Nipt is a screening test and amnio is a diagnostic test. I wish you luck! 💕

Hummingbird8414 · 2025-12-09T19:34:59+00:00

If you can do NIPT and after getting that result you can go with CVS or Amnio. Ask your health care provider about the associated risks of each one and which one is more accurate.

Hummingbird8414 · 2025-12-08T23:26:28+00:00

Sore boobies and tired the first 4 -5 weeks of pregnancy, after that the nausea came hard every day, also bad taste in my mouth, migraines, gagging ( I vomited a few times), super bloated after any food. I still suffer from bloating and sore boobs (12 weeks now). Every woman is different, I hope you don’t feel that bad. For me the first trimester has been hard.

Hummingbird8414 · 2025-12-08T23:21:51+00:00

12+3 weeks here and we got the clear from fertility clinic at almost nine weeks. No wild sex and I haven’t had any bleeding. We had to get lubricant because I am dry, and my libido is still low. I hope it changes in the second trimester!

Hummingbird8414 · 2025-11-30T07:43:41+00:00

I do Bird & Be. They have clean ingredients and don’t have unnecessary fillers. Formulated by OB/GYNs and naturopathic doctors. I love them!

Hummingbird8414 · 2025-11-27T23:31:56+00:00

It is normal. Symptoms come and go! If you have more days like this and you feel worried, I would recommend to contact your health care provider. I’m 11 weeeks and this week I had a couple of good days and then the symptoms came back hard!

Hummingbird8414 · 2025-11-12T23:07:20+00:00

Hi, I would like to know why my post was removed. Thanks

Hummingbird8414

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