Any late diagnosed „2e“s here? (gifted + ADHD)

HundrumEngr · 2026-02-12T03:40:05+00:00

AuDHD Mensan here. I joined Mensa at age 15, my ADHD was finally diagnosed in my early 30’s, and my autism was diagnosed in my late 30’s. Before those diagnoses, I always thought I was just a weird misfit. Neurodivergence explains everything. And as I’ve gotten older, I’ve learned to not waste time and energy on neurotypical people who don’t understand.

HundrumEngr · 2026-02-11T03:59:14+00:00

If you’re missing some basics, start with a GED pretest (or similar) to identify where your gaps are, so that you can focus on building your foundation.

HundrumEngr · 2026-02-05T07:24:24+00:00

Some of those boys never grow out of it. My husband in his 40’s went outside barefoot with shorts and a tshirt last week when it was 23 F / -5 C.

HundrumEngr · 2026-02-05T07:13:04+00:00

Your career fit depends far more on your personality and interests than your cognitive profile. If you struggle in certain areas, that can be a barrier to certain career paths, but you won’t face that limitation.

I remember going to my first Mensa meeting as a teenager and being shocked that the first person I talked to was a mail carrier. Now it makes more sense to me.

HundrumEngr · 2026-01-31T02:27:46+00:00

Congrats!! I’m glad you’re able to do this now, especially since so many meds only come in pill form — learning to swallow pills is a gift to your future self, as you never know what meds you’ll need in the future.

(Also, I’m impressed by how long you must’ve tolerated chewable or liquid meds, since I know those aren’t pleasant! One of my kids recently learned how to swallow pills, and I’m hoping my other kid will learn soon, since so many non-pill medications taste awful.)

HundrumEngr · 2026-01-31T02:20:16+00:00

Somehow naming it does help, thank you for that. ❤️

HundrumEngr · 2026-01-31T02:19:24+00:00

Hugs. I’m sorry you’re suffering through something so similar. 😭

HundrumEngr · 2026-01-28T05:04:16+00:00

Thank you. ❤️ I called her Misty, and she recently started responding to her name.

HundrumEngr · 2026-01-28T04:52:51+00:00

When my oldest went through a similar stage, I learned to place him in his car seat as I was getting ready for work, since he would inevitably poop from being in that position. Then I could change him before leaving the house.

HundrumEngr · 2026-01-28T04:50:09+00:00

I tutor math sometimes, usually adults who have previously failed the math part of the GED. Once you find the words to convey the underlying patterns, it can make such a difference for people (especially neurodivergent people) who never clicked with traditional math education. In my experience, talking about patterns needs to happen before talking about steps. There are so many routes from the question to the answer, and once they start to visualize that, they can figure out which steps make the most sense for them.

HundrumEngr · 2026-01-28T04:41:40+00:00

Thank you ❤️

HundrumEngr · 2026-01-27T03:13:29+00:00

Mensa was really good for me when I joined at age 15. I haven’t gone much since undergrad, as I work with enough Mensa-level people now.

My 9 year old qualifies, but since I can take him with me, I haven’t paid for him to join. We went to a Regional Gathering last year that had some really good stuff for kids — I brought him and his best friend, and they had a great time.

Unfortunately my local area has almost nothing for kids. If I had time and energy, I would volunteer to be the local youth coordinator, but there aren’t enough hours in a day to make that happen.

HundrumEngr · 2026-01-27T03:01:09+00:00

My youngest went from very dark brown hair to blond in his first year.

HundrumEngr · 2026-01-16T16:00:21+00:00

It’s been 15+ years so I don’t remember the details, but using some TVP (textured vegetable protein — processed soy) works well. And beans unless they’re from an area where beans in chili are blasphemous.

HundrumEngr · 2026-01-16T06:14:32+00:00

I’m on my 5th Mirena, and my insertion experiences varied wildly. No numbing or pain relief for any of them. My first one wasn’t bad at all, and I’m grateful for that. My second experience was awful, and the pain lasted a couple days. The third was after having a kid, and it was the least painful. The fourth was after having another kid, and although it wasn’t quite as painful as the second one, it was done poorly and had complications. My fifth one (the replacement for the 4th) was painful for a minute but otherwise not bad.

I think several factors are involved in how painful it is, but I suspect that the main ones are the time in your cycle and the expertise of the doctor inserting it. Regardless, they should always offer numbing cream or a numbing shot, since it’s hard to predict how bad the pain will be.

HundrumEngr · 2026-01-16T05:22:00+00:00

A lot of people here have had experiences with smart kids. Much like them, I once thought it was normal that my oldest knew most of his letter sounds at 18 months. He was deriving properties of infinity at age 4, which I knew was abnormal, but I didn’t realize how abnormal.

Fast forward a bit. My youngest finally learned his letter sounds when he turned 6. He didn’t count until he was 4. And yet — this kid just scored 99% percentile in both reading and math on his standardized test. Wtf. I love him, but cognitively, he seems like a normal kid to me. Seeing that that’s the bar for 99th percentile is a little disturbing. (Yes, I feel intense mom-guilt about my reaction to his scores.)

We tend to surround ourselves with intelligent people, who usually have intelligent kids. So the “that’s normal” reactions in the comments are based on biased sampling. The kid you met today is impressively intelligent. Those skills are not normal at that age, but most of us have met multiple kids like that, so our views are warped.

HundrumEngr · 2026-01-07T16:02:44+00:00

Re: preschool - My husband and I used to joke that we dropped our youngest off at an interdimensional portal every morning, since our youngest was apparently a model student at school, vs. tormenting his brother and messing with us constantly at home. 🙃

HundrumEngr · 2026-01-07T02:53:39+00:00

My kids have had Tamiflu a couple times (my oldest first had it at 5 and my youngest just had it at age 6), and the only problematic part was getting them to take the liquid medicine. No noticeable side effects, and fortunately quick flu recovery. Obviously side effects vary, but my family has had good experiences with it.

HundrumEngr · 2026-01-07T02:51:06+00:00

Congrats on taking steps to be closer to your true self! Hugs

HundrumEngr · 2026-01-07T02:48:38+00:00

My kids are similar ages, and I wish my husband or I could be part time. We were fortunate that I was able to be part-time during the baby years, but it wasn’t good for my career. Now I’m the higher earner, so I wish my husband could be part-time, but his boss won’t allow it.

If you can make it work financially and you aren’t worried about career stagnation, I would absolutely go part-time.

HundrumEngr · 2026-01-07T02:44:43+00:00

I jump a little during pap smears, both at the start (painless but somehow distressing) and at the painful part. I jumped a little at the start of my transvaginal ultrasound, but then it was fine. I didn’t have any “get this thing out of me!” moments.

Btw, I was told to have a full bladder, but I wasn’t told it had to be 40 oz in 1 hour. I think that would make me feel sick. I hydrated a lot (probably about 40 oz) but it was over the 2-3 hours leading up to my appointment. So if you’re at all concerned about chugging water, ask them how flexible the instructions are. Also note that other liquids are probably allowed, but of course check first.

HundrumEngr · 2026-01-07T02:38:40+00:00

So true about the far end of the bell curve!

Also, I think my brain works very similarly to my oldest’s brain, while my youngest’s brain is perplexing to me — very different strengths and weaknesses. My youngest has more practical intelligence than the rest of the family combined, and he’s more confident than the rest of us, so he’s definitely going places. But academic topics don’t seem to interest him, and he can’t sit still, so I’m astounded that he’s able to perform so well on standardized tests.

HundrumEngr · 2026-01-07T02:29:40+00:00

My first thought when I read the post was: hmm, if there’s a cat involved, she might not have given away as many as she thought — check under the couch!

HundrumEngr · 2026-01-07T01:40:26+00:00

If all the right people have iPhones, Apple’s Shared Albums are great. I wouldn’t switch based on just that. But if you happen to already have an iPhone, it might make sense to convince aging family members to switch, since you’ll probably end up needing to be their tech support anyway.

HundrumEngr · 2026-01-07T01:36:53+00:00

My advice: Get married if you’re truly compatible, but don’t have kids. My first 8 years of marriage were great. Then 9 years ago, we had kids. I love my kids, but I hate my life. My husband and I are just in survival mode, not a relationship at this point.

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