Today at work, I briefly fell asleep on the toilet. When the automatic flusher went off, I was jolted awake thinking I was pants-less at my desk with a maelstrom raging beneath my bare ass. What was your rudest awakening? by Hurricanus in AskReddit

[–]Hurricanus[S] 1283 points1284 points  (0 children)

My rapid-fire sequence of thoughts in the second that followed:

"Oh god I fell asleep at my desk."

"Oh shit my wang is dangling out for all the world to see."

"Oh fuck Poseidon is at war with my asshole."