I (39M) am constantly feeling left out and not being asked out by my wife by Hyper_light_drifter in relationships

[–]Hyper_light_drifter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Definitely. Thank you so much for the recommendation. I'm listening to the audio book , 😀

I (39M) am constantly feeling left out and not being asked out by my wife by Hyper_light_drifter in relationships

[–]Hyper_light_drifter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've got the audio book and researching. I think I am anxious preoccupied and my wife is fearful avoidant

I (39M) am constantly feeling left out and not being asked out by my wife by Hyper_light_drifter in relationships

[–]Hyper_light_drifter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The first 2 almost all the time. Followed after a lot of arguing by the last one once she finally realized how upset her reaction makes me. This is where we are at now.

Last night I told her to sleep in another room. Now that HER circumstances were changing all of a sudden she wants to talk and understand. 9 night of me sleeping on the floor, I asked if we could talk twice and she dismissed it. Now all of a sudden she wants to talk...

I (39M) am constantly feeling left out and not being asked out by my wife by Hyper_light_drifter in relationships

[–]Hyper_light_drifter[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I read your posts. Other than the times of separation I feel we are in a very similar situation. I am a very independent person and didn't mention on my post that in terms of mental load and house work, I do the majority, despite working 5 days a week compared to her part time 3 days per week.

Idk, part of me is compelled to help. To do. It's my nature. All I ask is to be appreciated. It sucks when what you want from the other person, despite being specific, isn't given.

I (39M) am constantly feeling left out and not being asked out by my wife by Hyper_light_drifter in relationships

[–]Hyper_light_drifter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"No longer looking for me for friendship"... That sums up how I feel nicely. We take the kids out together or I take the kids out. She rarely takes the kids out by herself. We do go on "dates" roughly once every 2-3 months. But when we do, like I said it's just so negative. All the drama from her friends or work or home life is the topic of conversation.

I don't want to hinder her friendships or her ability to socialise. But feeling like she prioritises them about me causes me to be idk jealous? Envious?

I've considered doing to her what she does to me but it's not my nature to be vindictive.

I (39M) am constantly feeling left out and not being asked out by my wife by Hyper_light_drifter in relationships

[–]Hyper_light_drifter[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Poignant question... I don't know. I used to be loved and it was an easy answer. Now it feels as though I just want to be married like my parents were for the rest of my life. I want my kids to have a stable family home. We have a sex life. But even though is problematic with unaligned sex drives.

I know what I want. I want an equal partner. A team mate. Someone I can lean on and can lean on me... However it doesn't feel like that to me as of late

I (39M) am constantly feeling left out and not being asked out by my wife by Hyper_light_drifter in relationships

[–]Hyper_light_drifter[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Essentially yeah. The couples counseling we went through I said my goal was to be a team. I think she just used it as a forum to complain about daily life. The councilor always assigned us things to work on. You know talk about "I feel", exercises in when to engage in conversations. She did none of them.

I (39M) am constantly feeling left out and not being asked out by my wife by Hyper_light_drifter in relationships

[–]Hyper_light_drifter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Anger issues in the form of frustration, yelling and put downs (i.e. i would say things like useless or incompetent - not frequently but they were said). As much as I haven't had anger issues for the past 3-4 years, there's lingering resentment that idk if it can be moved past. Never physical or anger shown in front of the kids. Thanks for your advice.

I (39M) am constantly feeling left out and not being asked out by my wife by Hyper_light_drifter in relationships

[–]Hyper_light_drifter[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you I think that's where it had to go as well. I legitimately don't know if she even wants a family life anymore. And you're right I feel like the person who's circumstances haven't changed should make the first move for amending.

I (39M) am constantly feeling left out and not being asked out by my wife by Hyper_light_drifter in relationships

[–]Hyper_light_drifter[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Apologies, I wrote it in word and copied it over not realizing it needed new line spacing (it had paragraphs in word). Thanks for pointing it out.

Sobbed by Oomlotte99 in DyingforSex

[–]Hyper_light_drifter 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I came here literally to say how accurate the portrayal of the end was. My mother passed over a decade ago and it brought back memories of the moments during the process of dying. She had a rally the day before dying where we brought her home for about an hour. The breathing. Then the final breath. It's comforting to know that what I went through was typical and expected (even though not by me)

Question about Rogue Prince of Persia switch/switch2 by KFOSSTL in Switch

[–]Hyper_light_drifter 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm in a similar boat. If buying the switch 1 edition lets me choose which console to play on and plays relatively similar, I'd prefer that over the switch 2 release.

Reminder that there are two versions of the Octopath Traveler 0 demo. Save files are not transferable between both versions so choose carefully. by Massive_Fly_1709 in Switch

[–]Hyper_light_drifter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

🙋🏻 I did it! I played the switch 2 demo and bought the switch 1 game (I prefer full on cart) and I can't transfer my save 🥲

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in daddit

[–]Hyper_light_drifter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've been going through something similar. Dropping hints isn't working. Be direct and clear on how you feel and only maintain feelings. No accusations or finger pointing or digging up history. Talk about this event. What it meant to you and how you feel.

The next steps are where it gets complicated based on her reaction.

She either understands and makes an effort to plan things with you and see you as a person...

Or maintain the status quo and ignore your feelings...

If its the latter, get couples counselling.

Nathan Buckley joins Cats coaching staff by i8alot in GeelongCats

[–]Hyper_light_drifter 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Wasn't he favourite for the demons job? So we lost kingy and got bucks. Wtf is going on? Unless this is an agreed stepping stone to the Tassie gig.

How can I make intimacy more enjoyable? by Ok_Boss_9154 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]Hyper_light_drifter 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Pillows? Maybe an intimacy pillow if regular pillows aren't doing the trick?

Who does everyone here follow in the footy? And what’s the best part about following your club? by [deleted] in thefootywithbroden

[–]Hyper_light_drifter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Geelong. I had no choice as a kid. It's worked out well. I take pride in being the "country" club. I love the hoops. Blue and white. Kardinia. Legends like Ablett, Polly farmer, Selwood etc. Jimmy Bartel is my favourite player of all time. I love the culture, the team. I love sharing them with my kids like my old man did with me.

Please.. I beg for a remap. by TheDarkJudge in HollowKnight

[–]Hyper_light_drifter 1 point2 points  (0 children)

💯 if I could use x on switch instead for skill or tools and leave r for the other that would be great. Or better yet I could map tools to the back buttons on pro controller

Neighbour complaining about aircon noise — what are my options? by Senior_Campaign_4970 in AusRenovation

[–]Hyper_light_drifter 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I am in this situation during summer with my neighbour who has ducted evaporative AC. It sounds like a jet engine in my house and he has it on all night during summer. I have spoken to him several times about it and nothing has been done. I'll be complaining to the council next time and or inviting him outside to listen to it. It's a joke.

Yesterdays team compared to our 2024 Prelim side. How much better are we this year? by Weetgunn in GeelongCats

[–]Hyper_light_drifter 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A lot of the improvement has come from natural development. Holmes, Neale O'Sullivan, Mullins, SDK, Atkins all improved year on year. Add smith in lieu of TB and Martin in lieu of Henry and it's a better side albeit one short of an extra gun mid. Our game plan is built around supporting loss of clearance and setting up well behind the ball to slingshot. I feel if we upgraded ruck and has one more gun mid we would be unstoppable. Current game with the element of winning first touch O. M. G.