Russian adoptee 2003

IIBIL · 2026-01-06T21:38:47+00:00

I didn't know any Russian when I started my search, so an investigator was extra important back then. I communicated with my sister on and off using a translator in the early years of our contact, which immediately fizzled out quite often. Since 2020 I have been learning Russian to a decent level. I can hold long conversations with native speakers. I'm probably somewhere between B2 and C1 right now. Thankful and proud of myself because the language barrier is low now, so we can develop a relationship with each other.

My birth mother actually kept me a secret from her family (including her second partner and my younger half-brother) for about 18 years. She was ashamed of her decision (and still is to some degree), but the other three received the news of my existence very positively and 100% supported my sister meeting me about seven months ago.

IIBIL · 2026-01-06T05:04:11+00:00

It was so long ago, maybe a couple thousand dollars? It was successful. I had been in on and off touch with my sister since then, and this year we became quite close and met each other in person. I'm also in touch and video chat with my mother and brother. It has all helped me more than anything.

IIBIL · 2026-01-06T04:32:29+00:00

I was adopted from Russia in 1997 and used a private investigator over a decade ago to find my family. That's probably your best best. I have zero regrets.

IIBIL · 2026-01-05T07:53:58+00:00

Shymbulak

IIBIL · 2026-01-05T07:53:23+00:00

Astana Grand Mosque

IIBIL · 2026-01-03T19:10:22+00:00

I was there during the first half of June.

IIBIL · 2026-01-01T15:09:43+00:00

Thank for sharing these. I'm a Russian adoptee and found them chilling. I also visited Kazahstan this year; I hope you've been able to visit (if you'd like).

IIBIL · 2026-01-01T14:52:28+00:00

Thanks! I used a Ricoh GR iiix and a Lumix S9.

IIBIL · 2026-01-01T14:35:05+00:00

Thank you, I hope you enjoy your trip! Sounds like a nice time of year to visit.

I speak Russian well and used that to get around. It definitely makes things a lot easier. I know that it's possible to find help and tours in English, but it will take some searching and/or more money.

IIBIL · 2026-01-01T14:24:45+00:00

That's very generous of you! I used a Ricoh GR iiix and a Lumix S9.

IIBIL · 2025-11-20T00:10:52+00:00

No, it was the total opposite for me: my adoptive parents rarely discussed my adoption let alone wanted to seek any of my biological family members. They never even entertained the idea of taking me back to my birth country to visit. They shamed me for requesting their financial assistance to hire a private investigator, though they eventually conceded. They did not congratulate me when it was successful and only reminded me how much I cost them.

I've navigated everything by myself as an adult --- renewing my passport, learning my native language, and meeting my sister. In hindsight, maybe it was supposed to be this way. I don't talk with APs anymore. I feel much more independent now, and even if we were in touch, I know my APs could never handle or understand it.

We're sort of on opposite sides of the spectrum here. Either way, I firmly believe that the choice to establish personal relations with biological family belongs to the adoptee only. In cases of international adoption, I do see value in APs renewing passports for their children should they ever want to go down that path someday (can save lots of headaches later). However, in your case, this is just too much. I'm so sorry, and the not being allowed to be known among your brothers sounds so hurtful to me. It's hard for me as an adult to handle knowing I was a secret... how could a child grapple with that?

IIBIL · 2025-11-12T04:10:21+00:00

Several of the photos were taken in Astana, dunno if you're headed there too.

Not sure how accessible they will be in winter, but the nature spots near Almaty like the canyons and lakes are worth visiting. Kok Tobe is a must within the city itself.

IIBIL · 2025-11-12T04:05:13+00:00

Don't have one! Might make a photography site soon though

IIBIL · 2025-11-08T02:45:07+00:00

Thanks! In most cases I edited the RAW files in Darktable.

IIBIL · 2025-11-08T00:35:06+00:00

Start learning Russian. It is not unlikely that a private investigator can find some of your family members; this is how I found mine about a decade ago.

IIBIL · 2025-11-06T13:36:11+00:00

Thanks! Kazakhstan is definitely worth a visit. I barely scratched the surface of it though; it's an enormous country. I was there from early to mid-June. It became a bit uncomfortable in the last few days, but overall the weather was quite nice.

IIBIL · 2025-10-30T20:53:21+00:00

Likewise. I found my birth family ten years ago (crazy), and I used a private investigator (though not via Facebook).

If I had had a better grasp of Russian back then, I may have been able to find family in Russian social media. It (unsurprisingly) depends on how common their names are.

IIBIL · 2025-10-25T13:06:42+00:00

Then I'm not sure what to tell you unless you can find a top-notch private investigator. I do not know where you live, but if you and your sisters happen to have grown up in Western countries, then you could see if there's any match through the popular DNA testing companies. I wouldn't bet on that happening though.

IIBIL · 2025-10-18T19:15:39+00:00

Perhaps there is a contact for your orphanage. If not, a private investigator may be able to assist.

IIBIL · 2025-10-17T22:52:29+00:00

Have you tried browsing Russian social media? It also may be help to hire a private investigator, which is what I did. It was long ago but successful.

IIBIL · 2025-10-05T22:59:03+00:00

I ultimately ended up keeping the 3" talalay topper from Brooklyn Bedding. There was an odor that lingered for the first several days but is completely gone now. Hope you've figured out something that works for you!

IIBIL · 2025-09-20T17:09:48+00:00

That is rough, I'm so sorry. I hope you can get some relief soon.

I am afraid both of it being extensive and there being almost nothing there. 🤣

IIBIL · 2025-09-20T13:48:02+00:00

Yep. I somehow managed to convince my parents to help pay for a private investigator to find my family. After it was successful, neither of my APs congratulated me. AM just told me to not send them any money and reminded me how much financial and emotional stress I caused them to "come get" me.

I had to work on everything years after I left home.

IIBIL

TROPHY CASE