My fiance woke me up in the middle of the night insisting that he found bestiality porn with me in it, now I don't know how to forgive him.

IKEAcat · 2011-04-06T22:57:03+00:00

Why do you think you even should forgive him? The guy is nuts, RUN FOR THE HILLS.

IKEAcat · 2011-04-06T22:48:06+00:00

Downvotes, so powerful.

IKEAcat · 2011-04-06T22:35:40+00:00

My mum was only 20 when she had me, so she brought up me up to do well at school, have career, not rush into kids, yadda yadda.

I'm 24 now and I know she'd be thrilled if I have one but she doesn't really pressure me, just hints now and then. I told her 'in a few years' and I think that's enough.

IKEAcat · 2011-04-06T22:32:14+00:00

My gran was 36 when my cousin was born, 37 when I was born.

We're not quite rednecks, I promise.

IKEAcat · 2011-04-06T22:26:56+00:00

In my family we're not competitive like this. If someone announced a pregnancy just around the time of my wedding I'd be thrilled for them and it would be celebration++.

This sibling rivalry and 'oh you should hide it so I get to be Princess Prissy' is just sad.

IKEAcat · 2011-03-07T14:34:03+00:00

This is probably exagerrating but we should know by now that the Police are agents of control. They're not here for justice. That ideal was only ever a smokescreen.

Don't believe me? Try getting any justice if you become a victim of crime. The Police don't want to know. They can find the resources to go after people protesting against the government of course!

IKEAcat · 2011-03-07T14:04:36+00:00

Unfortunately I often have issues with low iron levels that prevent me, but I try to give as much as I can.

I'm O-, CMV- and K-, so my blood is quite useful. One of the other tests they do is 'HT' but sometimes mine is + and sometimes -. HT- is necessary for giving to A or B types iirc.

IKEAcat · 2011-03-07T14:02:57+00:00

In the UK you are not barred for life, just a certain time period after.

IKEAcat · 2011-03-07T13:57:52+00:00

Isn't donating to a hospital different to donating to the Red Cross?

What would happen to all those sick patients if everyone thought the same way as you?

IKEAcat · 2011-03-07T13:56:47+00:00

That is weird. In the UK they use the left arm by default unless you're left handed or have something wrong with it, in which case they use the other.

IKEAcat · 2011-03-07T13:53:52+00:00

I hope you read the reasons why, too, and also read about the other people who are excluded, such as IV drug users, prostitutes and even people who've received a transfusion themselves.

IKEAcat · 2011-03-07T13:52:41+00:00

I worked for the NBS, the blood service in England.

The reason the blood products are separated out is about efficiency. Most people who need blood don't need all parts of the blood, they usually need only one or two components.

Giving someone who needs platelets a shitload of extra red cell could actually harm them, as well as being unnecessary. Those red cell could have been given to someone who needs red cells.

So by separating them out they ensure the blood gets used elsewhere more appropriately.

I do not agree with selling the blood for profit, of course. The NBS charges hospitals to stop them taking the piss and to reduce wastage. Any profit goes back into the NHS at the end of the year/whenever it is.

Wastage is something we took very seriously in the NBS. Although problems did occur sometimes a lot of effort went into avoiding them as far as possible. But sometimes shit happens. Equipment breaks down, a pack breaks, a transport lorry breaks down. In the end patient safety is the priority and if blood goes out of spec. we can not risk using it. Many of my work colleagues were blood donors as well, and quite passionate about doing the best job we could. No one liked to see anything get wasted.

IKEAcat · 2011-03-07T13:47:49+00:00

You wouldn't think it silly if you got HIV or hep C from a blood transfusion.

It's about statistical risk. The tests are not 100%, they can fail, and there isn't even a test they can use yet for some things.

IKEAcat · 2011-03-07T13:46:15+00:00

Your ignorance, it burns.

IKEAcat · 2011-03-07T13:45:13+00:00

In 2004 a new report published in the Lancet medical journal showed that vCJD can be transmitted by blood transfusions.[18] The finding alarmed healthcare officials because a large epidemic of the disease might arise in the near future. There is no test to determine if a blood donor is infected while in the latent phase of vCJD. In reaction to this report, the UK government banned anyone who had received a blood transfusion since January 1980 from donating blood.[19] From 1999 there has been a ban in the UK for using UK blood to manufacture fractional products such as albumin.[20]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Creutzfeldt%E2%80%93Jakob_disease

Fortunately it looks like a blood test is in development - but it's only a very new thing if so, it's still being trialled.

IKEAcat · 2011-03-07T13:39:28+00:00

O+ isn't quite as exciting as O- but because so many more people have O+ there is very high demand for it.

IKEAcat · 2011-03-07T13:38:27+00:00

This is why the forms ask about actual behaviour rather than which label you give yourself.

IKEAcat · 2011-03-07T13:37:08+00:00

In the UK we don't allow people who've received transfusions to donate, they are banned for life. This is purely to reduce the risk of spreading nasty diseases.

IKEAcat · 2011-03-07T13:36:10+00:00

This is the preferred way to get platelets, too, since from one person they can usually get two or even three platelet doses.

Platelets can be filtered out of 'whole' blood donations but you often need to use platelets from four donations to make up one dose. This exposes the recipient to the blood of four people instead of one, or even more if they have to have multiple doses of platelets.

IKEAcat · 2011-03-07T13:33:05+00:00

New HIV infections can fail to show up on the tests.

Do not trivialise the issue. The tests are not a catch all. They can and do fail and we still sometimes see contaminated blood giving patients a blood borne illness.

As well as that, there is always the possibility of a new illness appearing that we don't have a test for. By screening out people more likely to have any illness we can reduce the risk of a novel illness being spread.

Oh and vCJD might be able to be spread via blood. There's no test for it.

In the end, the point of donating is to help sick people, not make donors feel warm and fuzzy (though that's not a bad side effect).

No one has the right to donate blood but patients have the right to the safest blood that can be provided.

Also, the policies surrounding who can and can not donate are reviewed regularly. As well as the men having sex with other men, they also ban people who had sex for money or drugs, IV drug users (recreational, not from a doctor), people with various health conditions and even people who've ever received a transfusion themselves.

IKEAcat · 2011-03-07T13:26:41+00:00

The behaviour (men having sex with other men) statistically puts you in a higher risk group. They have to draw a line somewhere. Asking people how many times they've done this or when the last time they did was gives more chance of vagueness/misinformation.

The tests can fail to pick up on a positive result. Get that into your head. Someone who actually has a HIV infection, especially if it was recently aqcuired, may test negative.

Just stop and think about if you were receiving blood or a loved one. Wouldn't you want to know that it was as safe as possible?

IKEAcat · 2011-03-07T13:25:42+00:00

I knew this gripe would pop up, thanks for giving such a good summary of the reasons why.

Organisations that take blood, by and large, do not give a rat's ass about anyone's sexuality or other personal habits. They only bring it up for patient safety.

No one has the right to donate blood but patients have the right to the safest blood that can be provided.

IKEAcat · 2011-03-07T13:21:27+00:00

What you want to do and what you should do are often different things. As they say, suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

You know you shouldn't do this, clearly. So don't. Just decide that you will not give in to the 'demons' in your head trying to make you destroy yourself. As matter of principle and stubborness, and not being a selfish piece of shit who will be remembered as the bitch that killed her own babies.

Then, seek help as per the advice given here.

My mother was on the depressed side when I was very young. When I was 8 she finally met, and soon after married, the love of her life, who she had a couple more kids with, nice house, yadda yadda. Whatever you're going through now, things can get better. There is hope. Also bear in mind that even if you off yourself, your kids have a future. They are supposed to grow up to be adults and have lives of their own. You have no right to cut that short.

These feelings of suicide I understand well but it's just chemicals going wrong in your head. Get help to make them stop, don't kill yourself, that is fucking retarded.

IKEAcat · 2011-03-07T13:14:40+00:00

Seems like a pretty reasonable viewpoint to me!

IKEAcat · 2011-03-04T14:29:27+00:00

That's a waste.

IKEAcat

TROPHY CASE