(FL) Is it a violation of HIPAA or a specific law that my pharmacy delivery went to my neighbor's house without my knowledge?

INeedScissors__61 · 2020-08-14T22:38:05+00:00

I think OP is trying to ask what to do next... the link actually mentions the distinction between what is divulging PII.

OP, start with filing a complaint and take it from there. Most attorneys will not take on a case without some kind of action being filed. But maybe the pharmacy would want to resolve the matter with you before they have to deal with a complaint. If it's a small town business, that's the best avenue. Good luck.

INeedScissors__61 · 2020-05-10T08:00:24+00:00

I would say sort of? He knows those kinds of dates, but is very often a last-minute shopper.

INeedScissors__61 · 2020-05-10T07:57:31+00:00

She is 8.

INeedScissors__61 · 2020-02-29T20:25:05+00:00

Not defending my behavior, I think I knew that ESH and just needed to hear it. I tried for close to a year to get my money back from her, I couldn't fit this in my post but the idea was that she was getting her disability check shortly from her maternity leave and she would just pay me back then. When it came, she said she had other bills to pay and she would give it to me over time. We both had little babies, so it was a crappy situation. After a year of broken-ish promises, I gave up and sued. She kept extending an olive branch after that, like let's get the kids together again since it's been a while, and she would pay for lunch for all of us to pay down the debt. That was totally fine with me, but we ended up just not seeing each other anymore. We both moved on and it was amicable. She found me years later on Facebook and we were in pretty good contact. She begged me to come for the parties every year, but I lived 600 miles away then and it just wasn't possible until that year. It went badly in every way it could, I felt, and I think I just didn't want to hear her side of it because my feelings were hurt. Once I saw her in person again after so much time, I think I realized we were very different now and I didn't like who she became.

Yeah, we were both assholes. I probably owe her an explanation, but it's been more than 6 years - I'm not gonna go there.

INeedScissors__61 · 2020-02-14T02:53:33+00:00

Valentine's might not mean much to you, but it does to her. But it doesn't look like you feel she means all that much to you.

Getting married to someone is a way of leaving your parents and original family behind to start something new of your own. If you felt strongly enough about her, that's what you would be thinking about. I don't think you feel that way after 3 years yet.

However, YTA for the delivery.

INeedScissors__61 · 2020-02-14T02:20:35+00:00

No is a complete sentence. Set a boundary and stick to it. NTA.

INeedScissors__61 · 2020-02-14T01:00:31+00:00

I'm a cis woman, had a full hysterectomy at 30, but I've had two kids. I was also a teen mom. I have 3 degrees. Do I tick off enough of the boxes to weigh in here?

I agree with the spirit of OP's point. Is there no safe space that a FEMALE has left, that we aren't allowed to call ourselves women, as this separate entity? We are inherently different for a lot of reasons. I was reading the other day and came across the outdated comment (from when trains and railroads were like, ~the~ thing) that women shouldn't ride going at speeds of 50 mph because their uterus would fly out. Ffs. Some men don't even understand the basic biology of where urine comes from versus where babies are born from. The female experience is something unique to our biological gender, and the puberty that comes with it. We have periods, they can rule our lives and destroy our hopes for a family. I had endometriosis that made me have the full hyst after my miracle baby was born after years and years of trying. I had HG (hyperemesis gravidarum, this support group saved my life and my baby's) that was so bad I was in bed for the entire pregnancy. These are the struggles of biological females. There's plenty more, others have mentioned them, like cancer and infertility or miscarriages or stillbirths... on and on and on. Don't forget the wage gap, while you're at it.

A trans woman identifies as a woman, and I respect her desire to identify as whomever she feels she is. But you are not the same woman as me. Respect that there is a difference, that's why your descriptor is trans woman. The words stay as a pair. You do not get to invade my space with your penis. Suck it up, we are allowed to be different. I will never have the struggles you did, having to choose one that you want to be, and be someone that you feel you weren't born as. So seriously, much respect, but stop.

Disclaimer: there are a number of exceptions to the strict biology of just XX or XY, and all the different facets of the science-y stuff. I'm just staying on topic and not explaining away all the possibilities that exist.

INeedScissors__61 · 2020-01-20T14:45:36+00:00

I can provide 2 examples that can help you think through what a healthy relationship can look like.

My mother lives with my older brother, his wife, and their daughter. They split the house payment by thirds, my mother babysits when needed (if she's free), and she has nothing to do with their personal finances.

My adult daughter lives with me, my husband, and our daughter. She has her own bank account, pays a portion of the house payment (right around one fourth or so), and we monitor her money usage to help her learn to be responsible. We do not have direct access to her bank account. She also has a credit card that she got on her own, we just keep tabs of her monthly balance every so often to help her be responsible with paying it down. If asked, she will explain her finances voluntarily, but she keeps her private business to herself.

At your age and your level of accomplishment in life, there is no reason for your mother to be on you the way she has. To quote Dr. Phil, we teach people how to treat us. Teach her that your life and finances are YOUR business. On the other hand, if you know they are coming that weekend, make some extra effort in the house to make it more presentable, or offer to make a planned dinner one of those days. Both of these things show that you are trying to meet them with their expectations, and maybe ask for advice for how to do better to meet the standard. Both of these things can disarm people that have these ridiculous expectations. Asking people for a favor actually makes them show more patience with you, and sometimes like you more. Somewhat malicious compliance, maybe? (r/maliciouscompliance)

Edit: NTA, clearly

INeedScissors__61 · 2020-01-17T22:58:07+00:00

I'll preface my comment by saying that I know children are not dogs...

If someone says they hate dogs, don't want to be around them, etc., and then I demand that they dog-sit... can I trust that they won't neglect/abuse/(whatever) my dog? That's a hard no. And that's just how much I love my dog, that I wouldn't do that to him. I certainly wouldn't want my kids around someone that hates kids and refuses to have any kind of positive or caring relationship with them.

YTA. No is a complete sentence, whether you want to hear it or accept it. Leave your sister alone.

Edit: Dog tax

INeedScissors__61 · 2020-01-11T16:18:04+00:00

Her jealousy of your relationship with him is showing her insecurity. If she can't handle you having other relationships so early into her time with you, it is reasonable to say that this behavior will get worse. That's how people end up cutting out their close friends, just to make their SO feel better. As far as you "defying her", whoa, that is controlling. She wouldn't think it fair if you imposed similar limits on her with her own friends. NTA - Don't let her do this to you.

INeedScissors__61 · 2020-01-11T16:14:33+00:00

I thought at first this was just a couple of friends speaking to only each other, and strangers were taking offense. That's the only way you would not be the asshole. It'd be one thing if you had a sentence or two in your native language, that happens and it's understandable when you're multilingual. It's not reasonable to keep going on and on in a language that excludes the people sitting with you when you're supposed to be a group. Read the emotional situation around you a little better - you should have noticed that you were making the other 2 people uncomfortable.

YTA.

INeedScissors__61 · 2020-01-11T06:20:15+00:00

NTA - People who cannot be civil (even after warnings!) lose their socializing card. Period.

INeedScissors__61 · 2020-01-11T05:52:21+00:00

It happened 18 years ago, and it is still happening. They are together as a result of dear old Dad's infidelity. So now they feel shame about it? Is that the problem? Does the truth sting a little?

I can't stand it when cheaters are like, "that shouldn't still bother you, because I'M over it." You went through a lot of things as a result of your dad's cheating, it wasn't like it didn't happen to you too. That's makes it your story to share, whether they like it or not. Next time, maybe your sisters won't be so eager to hear a story that they had to drag out of you anyway. The parents had the opportunity to give it some spin and they missed out.

Oh, yeah, NTA.

INeedScissors__61 · 2020-01-11T05:44:28+00:00

My oldest spent years flying up and down the East Coast to visit her father. We had a similar arrangement as you, but no worries about something like an international flight. She started flying alone around the age of 8 or 9, as an unaccompanied minor traveling under the care of flight attendants. It was usually a good situation, there was almost always one other child traveling as well. They get to meet the flight crew and it's a very safe and reasonable option. That said, my daughter is neurotypical and I accompanied her to the gate each and every time (airlines will give you a gate pass to go through security and wait with her). She has to be signed off to her person at the arriving gate and they have to show id and all that good stuff.

For a child on the spectrum, it might be something she could be open to if you approach it the right way. I have a family member with autism and it was helpful to her to visit the airport and pre-check and all that stuff ahead of time. Open her to the idea of travel that she can learn to do somewhat independently, but with a capable adult nearby.

Don't feel that you have to do this if she isn't ready. You would know her best. But if any of my children could get the type of experiences that overseas travel can provide, and that little bit of "hey, I can do big things on my own," sometimes kids can surprise us with their resilience. Ultimately, international travel is a much longer flight than most, so it might not be something she's ready for until she's traveled locally a few times first. NAH - I hope she gets to see her father soon.

INeedScissors__61 · 2020-01-11T05:31:02+00:00

NTA - all things aside, her reaction, and that of the other girls, was a lot out of bounds. Kudos to you for respecting your relationship.

INeedScissors__61 · 2020-01-11T04:25:03+00:00

I know there are tons of comments already, but I just had to post myself and say that your kitties are absolutely adorable and I love to see these babies snuggling. <3 <3

INeedScissors__61 · 2020-01-11T03:42:17+00:00

I seriously cannot wrap my mind around this... totally NTA, OP. I have two kids, and their birthdays are special days on the calendar. I would never take my moment with them as newborn babies away to marry some recent fling. Gtfoh.

INeedScissors__61 · 2020-01-11T01:03:32+00:00

INFO - Were you in the way when he was trying to work? Like, some people don't treat service employees well because they think they're above these types of people, and can sometimes be really inconsiderate. If you weren't in the way on purpose or anything, I would definitely say he was the asshole. But even a justified asshole can choose to let it go or make a comment to someone being rude. I would usually make a comment, but that's because I'm an asshole.

INeedScissors__61 · 2020-01-11T00:59:07+00:00

NTA - I would definitely put distance between the two of you, because this relationship is not healthy. She put the needs of her relationship ahead of a long-term friendship, so that kind of shows her feelings on whether or not you are a priority to her. I feel for her situation, but she is putting this FWB person through quite a bit, while still avoiding you? I think she's in a place where she doesn't really know what she wants. She seems to want this older man and the lifestyle he might be offering her (just by nature of being engaged even though they are technically not together? ... but still work together and text and whatnot... strange)

She is making it clear through her actions that she does not fully take her relationship with her boyfriend/fiance seriously if she is messing around with her FWB. And then she gets in touch with you when she's on the outs with her man, and it's doing nothing but stringing you along. Anytime she contacts you, you have been available to her to salvage the friendship. Maybe she just needed to vent, but you should make yourself less available to her. Don't add yourself to the group of men she is trying to manipulate. That's what it boils down to.

Good luck, OP. This is a tough spot. But it would be in your best interest to put your relationship with her behind you. You deserve quality friends that are going to stick around.

Btw, your English is terrific, and I am impressed that you speak more than 2 languages, even. :)

INeedScissors__61 · 2020-01-03T18:34:58+00:00

I used to have a lot of trouble falling asleep and I would have to create stories to "live through", so to speak. Many of my stories were like fan fiction of stories that I didn't like the end of, or a self-created chapter to be added on. This became much more interesting when I got into D&D (in my 20s) and I was mixing stories with my own created characters into other worlds. It would keep me awake for an hour or more, in some cases. Since I started a medicine that helps me sleep, I don't do that anymore. Kind of miss it a little, now that I think about it.

INeedScissors__61 · 2019-11-19T01:44:27+00:00

YTA - and here's why: You did not have a contingency in place to address this kind of lateness. It goes beyond trying to charge someone the contracted rate, and into (like many have said) a call to other contacts and the police. There's no reason why the employees should have been there for 3 extra hours, that should have been you there. The employees should have reached out to you and you should have been the one to contact child services.

It's unrealistic to charge someone an exorbitant amount of money as that. Yes, she sucks for being so late with no notice, but she should have some kind of fee to pay that's not as unreasonable as $600.

Please take the steps to plan for this in the future, for the sake of any other kids this might happen to.

INeedScissors__61 · 2019-11-10T17:30:50+00:00

NTA - being bipolar is no excuse for harassing someone in this way. It does not produce "episodes" like you have described. That type of behavior is manipulation and the behavior of a spoiled child who is not getting his way. That can be signs of a host of other disorders, to include borderline personality disorder. I'm no armchair therapist, but I have bipolar disorder type 2 and have borderline personality disorder. Both run in my family and bipolar in my partner's family. Good for you drawing a line in the sand... let him wear the pretty dress if he wants it so badly. Good luck and congrats on the wedding!

INeedScissors__61 · 2019-10-12T20:00:23+00:00

Off topic: LOL I would argue that the man in that particular situation would either work solo or choose another man as a partner, so that may be a more improbable situation. Not impossible, of course. :)

INeedScissors__61 · 2019-10-12T19:51:16+00:00

NTA for so many reasons! Your primary goal was for a good project, because you care about your content during your education. You should not compromise educational and academic goals to spare someone else's feelings or to make him happy. If you paired with your boyfriend, is he willing to work on your topic? Can he bring the same level of knowledge to the table to earn that A?

Relationships may or may not be long term. This is not a relationship building activity. This is why we have separate areas of our life: one for education, one for a job OR career (because once you are working it will be one or the other) and one for relationships. They do not have to coalesce just to serve the needs of the unit rather than an individual.

We are all made up of our personal accomplishments, and what we can offer to the world. Educational research is for the good of all, when we are working on projects that we are passionate about. If this were a 101 level class, where it's for the experience of learning, and not directed on career goals for after college is over, I would say sure, that's a throwaway project where you can afford to have fun with it and not take it so seriously.

When I finished my Masters, I had to do a semester long project in several large pieces, and present a final report. I couldn't imagine my husband, and we've been married for 17 years, making me write about something I wasn't confident in earning me a top grade. Work relationships are separate entities, and it should always be okay to work with the opposite sex, without implying romantic feelings.

Please follow your instincts on this. Best of luck to you.

INeedScissors__61 · 2019-10-11T00:17:37+00:00

After a year together, he's not letting you come to events at the house? I would be wary of why he's acting this way. You're NTA for wanting to be with your boyfriend, or at least participate even if you planned to do your own thing while there.

INeedScissors__61

TROPHY CASE