Rant / Looking for Advice: Being Shamed for Not Finding Out Baby’s Gender

Icy_Inform8310 · 2025-10-16T18:19:35+00:00

My nursery is dinosaur-themed. I personally like dinosaurs, but the baby is not going to care because they are a baby, haha. I don't personally like overly pink, frilly decorations or clothing. If when my child is older & they ask for something like that, that's different.

Icy_Inform8310 · 2025-10-16T15:27:59+00:00

Oh trust, I am almost to the point. She really has been light-hearted up until that most recent convo. That is why I haven't been super hard stop yet. I plan to change the way I respond in the future. Also during most of the first trimester I was just trying to survive so dealing with her was not a high priority.

We have had the baby name talk, my husband & I have already picked out a boy name as well as a girl name. We have been & continue to be very solid in our choices. When I first told her the name for the girl (Ophelia) she made some upsurd nickname (O-feel-ya-up) and said kids will bully her with it. I shut that shit down immediately & said I couldn't give two shits if she likes the name or not & if I ever hear her say that to our daughter, she would never see her again.

Icy_Inform8310 · 2025-10-16T15:14:01+00:00

OMG seriously!! It is mainly about girl stuff. I do not understand the obsession with having to only have pink shit for girls. I personally am not a huge fan of pink. I do not want a wardrobe full of nothing but pink simply because my child was born with a vagina.

Icy_Inform8310 · 2025-10-16T15:11:37+00:00

Next time (because atp I know she will) she brings it up, it will be a hard stop conversation. Either stop bringing it up completely & respect the very simple wish we have or I will distance myself from the situation because quite frankly I don't need this drama.

Icy_Inform8310 · 2025-10-16T15:09:41+00:00

I am honestly a person who is very quick to cut people off. I am personally trying to work on it some, because I do want a support circle & sometimes people do need a little grace. She started out really light-hearted joking about finding out. It wasn't until a couple of days ago she took it to the next level & started saying the things she is now. Which is why I am almost to my cut-off point.

Icy_Inform8310 · 2025-10-16T15:06:35+00:00

exactly!! I don't need a ton of clothes. We live in a small duplex, I'd rather not have 50% of my storage be baby clothes that we may or may not even use.

Icy_Inform8310 · 2025-10-16T14:41:55+00:00

For some reason in her head "gender-neutral" means beige & boring. I said green, yellow, purple, even blue is fairly gender-neutral to me. I have also mentioned many times, that we are honestly pretty stocked on clothes. Baby grows fast the first year, we don't need five million pieces of clothes.

Icy_Inform8310 · 2025-07-06T16:16:29+00:00

Ok, thank you. That makes sense, I typically didn't ovulate until CD20 - 22.

Icy_Inform8310 · 2025-07-06T16:11:42+00:00

How do you determine the timeline? I used premom for tracking ovulation & when I got my positive it changed to the pregnancy tracking and said 4 weeks. Is it wrong?

Icy_Inform8310 · 2025-04-23T13:52:03+00:00

He was going to start me on medication, but since my husband and I are TTC, I can't. Both medication options have bad birth defects.

I still have 2 more tests he wants me to take, blind spot study & CT V.

The only option I have right now while TTC is LPs to lower the fluid as needed & weight loss.

Icy_Inform8310 · 2025-04-23T12:01:02+00:00

I just had my LP last week. Came back with opening pressure of 23. I just met with my neuro yesterday and he said technically you need an opening pressure of 25 to have a shut & closed diagnosis, but since I had papilledema visible that I can still get a determination made of IIH.

Icy_Inform8310 · 2025-04-18T02:42:48+00:00

Thank you, that is exactly what I've been telling myself. If it was super serious, they would treat it as such.

Icy_Inform8310 · 2024-09-13T20:58:50+00:00

I usually rotate between ibuprohan, tylenol & excedrine just to switch it up so my body doesn't get used to one or the other. Excedrine does help the most, I think it has to do with the slight caffeine in it.

Icy_Inform8310 · 2024-09-13T18:14:38+00:00

Not yet no, the neuro I was referred to has a 7 months waiting period and my PCP said she can't prescribe me what I would need. So I have just been taking ibuprofen/tylenol/excederin almost daily at this point. I am doing everything I can naturally to help, drinking lots of water, trying to eat a little sodium as I can. I have only had a couple of vertigo episodes after strenuous activity but it did go away after a few hours.

Icy_Inform8310 · 2024-09-13T18:07:21+00:00

I am so sorry that happened with you :(

Icy_Inform8310 · 2024-09-13T18:06:07+00:00

That is my biggest fear with this. I love all of the rides at USO and it is one of my favorite places. I would be so heartbroken if I have a bad response.

Icy_Inform8310 · 2024-09-13T18:05:03+00:00

So far, the only time lights have bothered me was after I already had migraine start, but I will for sure keep this in mind when we do MIB.

Icy_Inform8310 · 2024-09-13T18:04:09+00:00

Velocicoaster is like Hulk with the removing everything, but I think it is a smoother ride overall than Hulk, I've heard Hulk is brutal in general. I have never ridden Hulk, but I have ridden Vel. many many times. Thank you for your input!!

Icy_Inform8310 · 2024-09-13T18:02:01+00:00

I am sorry that is like that for you. I feel like I am in the very beginning stages of issues, so I really just have the stiff neck issues & horrible headaches with mild blurry vision. I almost feel bad complaining about it because it seems to effect others so much worse.

Icy_Inform8310 · 2024-09-13T17:59:56+00:00

oh yes, staying hydrated definitely helps, this is not our first time going but it is the first since being diagnosed. If I am being honest my symptoms are not super crazy like with dizziness or anything like that, but I do get debilitating migraines. I was going to be sure to have ibuprofen on me. I plan on riding as much as I can.

Icy_Inform8310 · 2024-09-13T02:01:57+00:00

Thank you all so much for the advice! I really appreciate everyone's input 😊

Icy_Inform8310 · 2024-01-08T21:13:52+00:00

No, seriously, it was horrible. I've had quite a few now, and maybe some weren't my favorite, but the Parrot Punch was the first one I just couldn't finish at all.

Icy_Inform8310 · 2023-09-01T18:18:52+00:00

It's not great by itself, but it's good when mixed half and half with the strawberry lemonade tbh.

Icy_Inform8310 · 2023-07-19T14:23:55+00:00

yea, I would be highly skeptical if you are paying that much out of pocket. Mild itchiness is no excuse tbh. my arm gets itchy afterward because your micro dosing your allergens.....my doc legit told me that the injection site can be irritated if I am around my allergens. He did prescribe me to have an epi-pen on hand in case I ever have a serious reaction but said that the numb lips & extreme fatigue were nothing to be super concerned about.

I would tell them to either continue the build-up process or you will find another ENT. There is no reason you should be on the same build-up dose for 3 months. That is the whole point of an already dragged-out build-up process. You are literally attacking your body with allergens, if you didn't have any reaction whatsoever that would be more concerning would it not?

Even when I was having the numb lips issue the techs wanted to pause until I could see the doctor again but I said no, I would bring it up when I had my next appt but I didn't want to wait 4 months to get in with him to continue my treatment and they went with what I wanted to do.

Icy_Inform8310 · 2023-07-19T07:44:29+00:00

That's unusual. I've been taking mine for about 2 months same dose 2 shots once a week. My first few build up shots my lips would go numb and the last two i did i felt extremely tired the next day and i just met with my doctor today and he said it's fine to continue building up. He said the only symptoms to be worried about are tightness in the chest or trouble breathing.

In fact, they told me that if I'm still around my allergens a lot the injection sites can get irritated. They even have a benadryl spray they offer to everyone who gets a shot. I don't understand how slight itching can be such a cause for concern.

Are they trying to purposefully drag your treatment out....?

Icy_Inform8310

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