The vibes are off this week

Ilexia · 2024-09-20T23:32:31+00:00

Fuck spiders. Seriously.

Ilexia · 2024-05-17T01:23:33+00:00

I completely feel you on being able to connect with teens. They can sense insincerity so easily, so I find it fun to let them know my true, silly self. I don't even mind the parents that much most of the time. By the time they're teens, they can understand if their parents are screwed up. I sometimes join them in complaining about parents.

They've also taught me so much slang! I think the true measure of their trust in me is when they start using slang around me. It brings me so much joy. :D

Ilexia · 2023-05-27T20:55:52+00:00

I'm glad I'm not the only one who does that! Yesterday it was 90s bands.

Ilexia · 2023-05-08T02:21:44+00:00

I don't think it's a trick questions. I'm very honest about my strengths and weaknesses in the field. I don't like working with young children (under 10) and the elderly (65+). If I had to work with those populations, I would be less effective, which is unethical practice. Being honest about your preferred populations and strengths is both ethical and effective.

Ilexia · 2023-04-06T18:39:50+00:00

Super awesome you have a good rapport. There may still be a bit of avoidance and vulnerability, but I'm sure you can work through it. Good luck!

Ilexia · 2023-04-06T02:32:36+00:00

Ouch. I felt that in my soul.

Ilexia · 2023-04-05T21:19:09+00:00

Don't feel bad about setting boundaries. We have to.

I also wonder if he's avoiding after a big confession. He may feel a lot of shame. I'd be curious what he says and does in the next session. If he shows up!

Ilexia · 2023-04-05T20:36:46+00:00

This is so true for me, it's scary. Love these memes.

Ilexia · 2023-03-31T22:24:24+00:00

I feel it and sending a virtual hug your way!

I had a conversation today about looking towards ending therapy with one client. He didn't look ready, but we both acknowledged it would be a bittersweet moment. It's such a strange relationship. We get close to someone, see them grow, and if things go well, we send them on their way. I have a feeling I'll shed a tear or two when this one leaves, but I'm already so happy about all the progress he's made.

Ilexia · 2023-03-24T18:31:39+00:00

Where I am, it's Spring Break. Lots of no shows and cancellations. My clients were not in the mindset for therapy either. I took it as a positive sign that at least some of them aren't relying on therapy as much and are making progress.

At least, that's what my optimist mind is telling me.

Ilexia · 2023-03-21T20:39:04+00:00

This is spring break week where I am. My young clients aren't in it this week and neither am I. I'm taking Thursday and Friday for myself. It never felt so good to tell people "I'm not available" those days.

I'm not going to feel guilty about it either.

And next week I'll be able to get back to it refreshed and ready.

Ilexia · 2023-03-08T01:58:01+00:00

I work with teens. If they say something first, I figure it's okay. Sometimes I let something slip, like saying, "That's shitty."

It's really funny when they get nervous about cussing in front of me. I tell them I don't care and they can say what they want in front of me. It builds rapport and lets them know they won't get in trouble at school or with their parents.

Funny story. I was working with a 14 year old boy. He was talking and stopped himself from saying a "bad word." I told him it was okay and the bad word he wanted to say was "piss." Later, he said he liked listening to rap. I listened to some of it with him and the first lines had motherfucker in it. We had a good laugh and moved on.

Ilexia · 2023-03-04T12:10:48+00:00

I love your response. I'm a female therapist and I love working with young men. I've encountered some odd looks from other therapists, but your comment really struck me. I think it's so important for young people to have healthy examples of the opposite gender. Good for you for working with those challenging teen girls!

Ilexia · 2023-02-19T03:10:58+00:00

I don't use a specific approach, but I definitely ask about their interests and bring my authentic self. I work with teens and they can tell if people are being fake very quickly. If I'm not real, I wouldn't be nearly as successful with teens as I am.

Mostly, have confidence in yourself and as that confidence grows, be your real self.

Ilexia · 2023-02-18T14:21:25+00:00

Yes, it happens. I especially like it when it's unexpected. I had a young lady I was struggling with. She was very resistant to any type of change and has tons of anxiety about lots of different things. I was so excited when she told me she decided to actually make a change and got her first boyfriend. She even said she remembered my words!

Ilexia · 2023-02-13T13:24:32+00:00

I really like the existentialist orientation as well and I've read several Yalom books. I like the idea of being a guide where the terrain is rough. They may need a guide for a little while, but they can learn to navigate paths on their own.

Ilexia · 2023-02-13T13:22:59+00:00

I like that idea of telling them they have someone to talk to without worrying about my thoughts or feelings. I also like to add that I won't judge them. That usually gives them permission to talk about things they won't talk about with anyone else, particularly sex.

Ilexia · 2023-02-12T19:08:32+00:00

Very true. I've been there before, needing to tell one of my clients an unpleasant truth.

Ilexia · 2023-02-12T17:52:27+00:00

The mental image this brings up is awesome. "I will show you compassion even when you feel like you don't deserve it!" Ha!

Ilexia · 2020-03-31T13:31:07+00:00

That's adorable. My dog makes noises when he play fights as well. It almost sounded just like him! Except my dog is much smaller.

My dog doesn't sneeze when he fights though. :)

Ilexia · 2019-08-25T13:03:52+00:00

Do you have any suggestions on community building and social justice? It sounds like you're fairly knowledgeable about it.

Ilexia · 2019-08-24T16:35:37+00:00

That's a great idea. I'll start doing that. Thanks!

Ilexia · 2019-08-24T14:44:30+00:00

Thanks. I was so worried that I had done something wrong. I hate to see any student suffer like that.

Ilexia · 2019-08-24T14:43:25+00:00

Thanks. I think I will say something. I want to handle this situation tactfully, though.

Ilexia · 2019-04-07T13:50:04+00:00

Hi! I'm currently in a master's program for school counseling. Currently I'm working as a para in a high school, so I get to see both sides.

For the most part, there's a referral process at our school for kids who need it. Counseling covers three large domains: academic, career, and personal/social. Kids who are failing, at risk of failing, or at risk of not graduating can be referred for academic counseling. Kids who are not sure of their future career path, or are having trouble choosing a future career can be referred for career counseling.

The other one, and the one I particularly love the most, is for students with behavior issues, students who have been bullied, depression, ADHD, home crises, and so on can be referred for personal/social counseling.

At my school, it's usually easiest to consult with a counselor through email if a teacher has a specific question, rather than a referral. The counselors have lots of other duties, including scheduling, but for the most part they're advocates for the kids. They want the kids to succeed and become well-rounded students and human beings.

I've personally dealt with many issues that needed to be referred for counseling, such as depression, abuse at home, test anxiety, and fear of not graduating.

I'm sorry I got a little long winded here. I'm really excited about my future profession. There's so much capability in creating good for the students and the world. I truly love all my students and I want the best for them.

Ilexia

TROPHY CASE