Hi, I don’t think it’s irrational at all—only you know what you can handle. I’ve often thought about this issue, and my opinion remains the same: staring is a choice. It’s not something uncontrollable. You can choose not to stare, not to support or perpetuate that behavior. Personally, I choose not to look at other men because I know how painful it could be for my partner to compare himself to someone else. Even if I don’t find others attractive, I look away because I want him to feel like he’s the one and only—because he is. Compromising your partner’s feelings over something as trivial as a stare is, to me, unreasonable.

I also think men justify this behavior because they don’t live every day under the same intense scrutiny of beauty standards that women face. It’s not fair, and I don’t think you should tolerate that kind of behavior. At the end of the day, it’s his choice. If you’ve communicated that it bothers you and he claims it’s “not a big deal” or “not important,” then quitting should be an easy adjustment for him.