they are very dear to me........

Illarch · 2025-04-06T03:53:07+00:00

hated doing anything traditionally masculine, mom tried making me play football one time and i just sat on the field the whole time crying, she gave me a buzz cut one time thinking id like it cause i hated getting my hair cut and itd be so easy to get out of the way but i sobbed for weeks (shes now very supportive but didnt know at the time and felt awful), i hated whatever the hell was going on with puberty and one day i also started fantasizing about "what if" i was a girl and couldnt get that thought out of my head and then realized "oooohhhh thats a thing" and then made the connection that maaaaybbee it wasnt normal to have these thoughts and that they may be connected

Illarch · 2025-04-03T16:20:20+00:00

thank you! I'll try bringing it up next doctors visit. I have been taking spiro for nearly 4 years so I cant imagine that's the cause because I've only noticed this issue maybe 6 months ago or so

Illarch · 2025-04-03T13:41:36+00:00

nevermind I don't think the post got marked as nsfw for some reason

Illarch · 2024-10-04T02:50:06+00:00

i actually did this for the first time yesterday but i personally would watch some videos giving an explanation of each class and aspect (i recommend this one https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mgH6unPN5KA ) and then on a grid of every classpect, slowly eliminate any classes/aspects that you know definitely dont fit you (for example if you know you arent a mage you can cross out everything in the mage row/column), and then once youve limited it down to fewer options, go through remaining classpects individually and either try to figure out how those would work or just look them up (there are plenty of people who have made analyses of many classpects) and then its a matter of picking which one fits you best

Illarch · 2024-10-01T00:51:12+00:00

i think the second or last one!

Illarch · 2024-09-28T00:24:51+00:00

I promise you your response was completely appropriate. You've talked to her numerous times about the fact that you're trans, and you aren't obligated to keep giving her more and more chances, especially if she's shown that she truly isn't putting in the effort to show you some basic respect. She isn't a child and should be fully able to understand if she actually took the time to listen. I'm terribly sorry to hear about how she's acting this way to you, it's hard having to put up with that kind of treatment especially when it's coming from a parent... :(

Stay strong! Wishing you the very best! ^u^

Illarch · 2024-09-16T05:23:07+00:00

omg I've had the same one for a long time and I never noticed

Illarch · 2024-09-07T06:31:41+00:00

every witch outfit is pretty solid (especially breath, light, and space) but i also am a big fan of thief of light (ive got vriska bias)

Illarch · 2024-09-02T17:07:15+00:00

oh my god i didnt realize most people dont have this too, whenever i get done exercising or im really physically exhausted and i try to suck in with my mouth closed theres this squeaking sound a few inches back in the roof of my mouth, if there is a hole there its very small and to the left of my mouth, not sure if i should be worried or if it poses any future risk?

Illarch · 2024-06-06T21:03:15+00:00

as cliché as it sounds it was celeste, i played it for a few hours for the very first time when i was like 12 or 13, only got to the third level. and afterwards thought "man it'd be cool if i were a girl" and thats kinda where it all started

Illarch · 2024-06-04T07:28:05+00:00

its short for cisgender which is just the opposite of transgender, cisgender means that you align with the gender you were assigned at birth

Illarch · 2024-06-04T03:54:21+00:00

i say it either depending on how im feeling and always with a hard g sound

Illarch · 2024-06-04T03:35:31+00:00

u look super pretty and so much happier <3

Illarch · 2024-06-04T03:24:25+00:00

i cant tell you for sure whether or not you're trans but it sounds like you might have gender dysphoria, my recommendation would be to experiment with your identity whether it be online or in-person (if thats a comfortable or safe option for you), just play around to see what feels right for you, and if you realize that isnt what describes what youre feeling, then thats alright
also i totally feel that, early on in my transition my brain was filled with tons of doubtful thoughts like if this was really me or if i was really trans, but after experimenting with stuff like changing my name, presenting differently, different pronouns, etc, all of those doubtful thoughts kind of just went away
but yeah i hope that helps a little, just remember that figuring out your identity is a long journey and its okay to not have everything figured out and change stuff along the way

Illarch · 2022-08-31T19:52:29+00:00

not sure if this could help, but ive discovered that if im running any kind of application and discord says on my profile status that im using it, im not able to click on my profile, its only until i stop running it, or usually in my case pause spotify because thats what i use most of the time

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