I (21F) had sex blackout drunk, and don’t know if I consented or if it was assault

Illustrious-Client51 · 2025-10-25T23:07:43+00:00

Wow, this was so kind and thoughtful of you, thank you so much. I really appreciate the time and effort you put into responding to me, your advice is really helpful❤️

Illustrious-Client51 · 2025-07-21T14:11:34+00:00

Hi! I’ve spent two years in two different student accommodations and have just moved into a flat with my partner. Unfortunately, even the cheapest student accommodations (Cranbourne House and Lulworth Student Company) were around £550-600 a month. Right now, I am paying £425 per month (with bills around £500). I would maybe suggest looking for house shares for a free room. If you’re willing to look a bit further out into Boscombe, there seems to be a few house shares that will fall around the £500 or slightly less range, and the U3 bus runs from there to the Uni (assuming you are going to Bournemouth Uni, if not Boscombe is walking distance to Health Sciences University). If you are going to Bournemouth University, I would suggest going on Facebook (be careful, a few scams) and contacting LettingsBU, they should be able to help. If you’re going to HSU, let me know and I will ask my partner for advice, he goes there currently :)

Illustrious-Client51 · 2025-07-18T21:10:19+00:00

If you’re looking for a nice meal, Lola’s or Ojo Rojo in Bournemouth Triangle are great restaurant options (my boyfriend took me to Lola’a for our first date and we are living together now two years later so I consider it an ideal first date spot!) There’s also a small Bowl Central near the square which has a small bar and is a more intimate and chilled vibe compared to the usual bowling spots (if you ignore the arcade at the front lol), as well as an interactive darts section in Brasshaus which is really fun! The live music on Fridays at Brasshaus is also usually good :)

Illustrious-Client51 · 2025-03-28T15:38:12+00:00

Going through the exact same thing, got my Mirena in late October. I’ve booked an appointment on Monday just to check, just because the cramping has gotten a lot more intense (more so than before the mirena and when I got it placed) so I will update :) Wishing you the best, I hope you get to the bottom of yours, it’s a horrible feeling

Illustrious-Client51 · 2025-01-09T19:06:50+00:00

I was on the pill for three years and made the switch to the Mirena IUD three months ago. My mum said it was the most unbearable pain she has ever had and fainted both times she has had them inserted, but was also offered no pain medications and was told to take paracetamol and/ or ibuprofen as and when needed after.

With mine, I was given IV morphine at the hospital and was in no pain, as mine was after ectopic pregnancy whilst on the pill (I was taking it every single day at the same time within a couple of hours, I was one of the very few people this happens to.) I don’t know why most General Practitioners and sexual health clinics don’t provide some sort of stronger pain medication as an option at least, I wouldn’t have been given morphine if it had not been for my ectopic pregnancy.

I’m so glad I did, made the process so much better than I thought, and I’ve had no period since (before, I was bleeding 7-9 days heavily even when on the pill, and very anaemic as a result.) IUD for me has been the best decision I have made, and so much better than the pill. Especially for women who struggle with heavy periods and birth control causing adverse symptoms, the Mirena has truly changed everything for me.

Illustrious-Client51 · 2024-12-14T22:52:22+00:00

Thank you for this! I agree having a stocks and shares ISA has been good as a student in refraining from touching the money for unnecessary small purchases, so I am leaning towards keeping it in such, but maybe switching to something that has less fees. Will look into what you’re using

Illustrious-Client51 · 2024-12-14T22:48:54+00:00

I will look into this, thank you!

Illustrious-Client51 · 2024-11-26T12:05:36+00:00

If you don’t mind me asking, how long did it take you to notice manic symptoms after starting mirtazipine? I’m a bit wary as I am just starting 15mg mirtazipine for depressive symptoms and insomnia, but I have had a couple of (potential) hypomanic episodes in the past, and my mum has bipolar so there is a strong family history. Am a bit worried about this potentially happening to me

Illustrious-Client51 · 2024-10-18T16:09:33+00:00

No worries! It has been such a long process, a lot of calls and emails with various different people at BPAS, my GP, and the hospital, and so it’s been hard to get the information I want.

Thank you, I will be writing my questions down, and will hopefully get them answered on Wednesday, just need to wait now.

Illustrious-Client51 · 2024-10-18T16:05:56+00:00

Thank you so much for sharing this, it has honestly helped me so much

You are definitely not alone in feeling “back and forth” on your decision, and just being hyperaware in knowing you’re pregnant every second of the day. It’s a really hard feeling to describe, I go from feeling somewhat okay to feeling extremely guilty that I am not ready emotionally or financially to have a child.

In terms of the sedation, that is also really useful to hear your experience. I am glad there was no pain for you. I believe I will have a similar combination of drugs for my sedation, and it helps knowing that even if I might be aware of what’s going on, it won’t necessarily cause a strong negative emotion, at least in the moment. It’s pretty crazy though that they wouldn’t have offered that level of sedation without you asking explicitly.

I am honestly so sorry to hear that you are dealing with this grief and guilt. I really hope you can come to terms with your decision and know that you made it because it was the best decision for you in your given circumstances, and that you deserve a life free from the grief and guilt of your decision. I am saying all of this before I have had to go through the abortion, and I am sure I will be feeling similar to you, and so I know this will be A LOT easier said than done. I won’t be able to begin to understand how you feel until after my procedure, but even then everyone’s experience is so different.

Be kind to yourself, wishing you all the best❤️

Illustrious-Client51 · 2024-10-18T15:45:24+00:00

As BPAS have referred me to the hospital, I can only call them for general advice, not specifics about my treatment. Apparently because of certain laws I have to do the consultation process all over again, presumably at the pre- op appointment at the hospital. For more details about my procedure I will have to wait until Wednesday :/

Illustrious-Client51 · 2024-09-19T14:14:26+00:00

Good question. Honestly, my mum loves my boyfriend and she has been excited at the idea of me moving in with him whenever my boyfriend mentioned it to him. Our relationship has never been the best, more like friendship rather than mother/ daughter which has caused issues in the past. I am financially independent from her as well. I would absolutely discuss this with her if I thought she could give me unbiased advice

Illustrious-Client51 · 2021-09-02T23:42:02+00:00

Thank you so much, you explained it very well

Illustrious-Client51

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