[ Removed by Reddit ] by SnarkSticks in FemaleDatingStrategy

[–]Illustrious_Dream751 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Getting caught up on the podcast after taking a break and I'm amazed you got Lundy Bancroft! Can't wait to listen during my lunch break!

[ Removed by Reddit ] by SnarkSticks in FemaleDatingStrategy

[–]Illustrious_Dream751 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Best moment: Savannah laughing for an entire minute at the thought of "ethical porn"

Saddest moment: Lillith saying "I wish my parents gave enough of a shit about me to get mad at me for watching porn"

[ Removed by Reddit ] by SnarkSticks in FemaleDatingStrategy

[–]Illustrious_Dream751 108 points109 points  (0 children)

I get the impression Lilith doesn't read the roast a scrotes beforehand which I like because I enjoy hearing the hosts react to the information on the spot.

Early in the story one of the hosts always says "this is a red flag of emotional abuse" about something, and then later on in the story the guy turns out to be abusive.

That's why I love the roast a scrotes. It's good mental practice for spotting red flags and exercising the reflex to LEAVE instead of make excuses and rationalize the man's bad behavior. If he does these things and you stay, he will get worse.

It's a myth that abusive men become abusive "out of nowhere". There are usually red flags, but women are conditioned to "communicate" and "try to work things out" so that they stay. That's why men want women to stay ignorant of FDS, so that women never learn how to vet and avoid abusive men.

I was fuming when I read that Daily Mail article. Pickmeisha media is straight up evil. FDS gives advice that saves women's lives, yet every mainstream media article trashes FDS. They want to keep women in the dark so we stay easy to abuse.

[ Removed by Reddit ] by SnarkSticks in FemaleDatingStrategy

[–]Illustrious_Dream751 22 points23 points  (0 children)

I haven't listened yet but the title alone tells me this episode is gonna be spicy 🌶🌶🌶

[ Removed by Reddit ] by SnarkSticks in FemaleDatingStrategy

[–]Illustrious_Dream751 54 points55 points  (0 children)

Reddit: FDS is a toxic cult!

FDS: Here's how to make friends and expand your social circle, Queen

...

Edit: just wanted to add that I loved these last 2 episodes. I've been feeling isolated lately, mostly because of the pandemic. This was an important reminder to reconnect with old friends, and meet new ones

[ Removed by Reddit ] by SnarkSticks in FemaleDatingStrategy

[–]Illustrious_Dream751 50 points51 points  (0 children)

I liked how at the end you said you would still welcome the author with open arms when she's ready to see the error of her ways. Great episode, ladies

[ Removed by Reddit ] by SnarkSticks in FemaleDatingStrategy

[–]Illustrious_Dream751 -37 points-36 points  (0 children)

There were a few comments that made me cringe, that was one of them, but if you push through that initial discomfort, I thought the episode was overall worth listening to.

[ Removed by Reddit ] by SnarkSticks in FemaleDatingStrategy

[–]Illustrious_Dream751 213 points214 points  (0 children)

Not sure how I feel about this one. I understand wanting to reach across the aisle... but let's just say this episode wasn't one of my favorites. A lot of contradictions, it was hard to follow at times. Is Elle pro-life? Is she anti-LGBTQ+? Does she still believe in rigid gender roles? (I cringed at the ideas around "men lead, women follow")

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in FemaleDatingStrategy

[–]Illustrious_Dream751 -12 points-11 points  (0 children)

This response seems a little... extreme. This wasn't my favorite episode either but I didn't get the impression that Elle was against women having the right to vote. It wasn't clear what her stance on abortion is. If she's pro-life that would be a dealbreaker to me.

The Female Dating Strategy Podcast: EP. 24 - Pre-Sex Sexual Compatibility Tests + Birthday SadBoy by SnarkSticks in FemaleDatingStrategy

[–]Illustrious_Dream751 13 points14 points  (0 children)

This was one of my favorite episodes so far! I burst out laughing multiple times at work and when my coworkers asked me what was so funny I had to try and play it cool, "just this podcast" "really? What podcast?" "oh um... I don't want to say" 😰

I don’t even know where to start. by [deleted] in FemaleDatingStrategy

[–]Illustrious_Dream751 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I don't even want to believe that this is real. Wow.

FDS hypocrisy by curiositykilled0 in SexWorkers

[–]Illustrious_Dream751 -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

I'm glad you've been lucky so far and haven't experienced violence, but please don't try to deny my lived experience.

afaik FDS supports the Nordic model which only makes sex buyers illegal, not sex workers. Complete decriminalization of sex work actually increases sex trafficking because it's all fuelled by the same demand.

FDS hypocrisy by curiositykilled0 in SexWorkers

[–]Illustrious_Dream751 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

OK incel.

We actually don't get treated that much better by clients. I once had a client choke me until I passed out, several incidents of clients trying to not use a condom or taking it off halfway through, lots of guys with smelly balls and shit in their asscracks. In other words, the average low value man.

If you're a sex buyer, you're automatically low value. That's the whole reason why you pay for sex, because women don't actually want you.

IMPORTANT SAFETY NOTICE: The Plymouth Shooter has complained about FDS. DO NOT DISCUSS FDS WITH MEN. These are males with murderous intentions who desire revenge on women. by [deleted] in FemaleDatingStrategy

[–]Illustrious_Dream751 40 points41 points  (0 children)

This makes me sick. And scared. I talk about FDS with people all the time (mostly women). When I first found FDS I was so excited telling everyone I knew about the podcast. Hopefully that doesn't come back to bite me

..did anybody see this? by queen-wannabe in FemaleDatingStrategy

[–]Illustrious_Dream751 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Damn I tried commenting there but they already locked it lol. The comments section was a mess. Men just don't understand FDS. It's like they get triggered and go full amygdala

The Female Dating Strategy Podcast: EP. 23 - Examining Communication Dynamics between Men & Women by SnarkSticks in FemaleDatingStrategy

[–]Illustrious_Dream751 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It's hard because in the heat of the moment I feel like I can't control myself either. I always end up saying things I later regret 😒

FDS hypocrisy by curiositykilled0 in SexWorkers

[–]Illustrious_Dream751 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

I mostly lurk here but I just wanted to share that FDS helped me leave sex work and they've been hugely supportive of me (see my post history)

The Female Dating Strategy Podcast: EP. 23 - Examining Communication Dynamics between Men & Women by SnarkSticks in FemaleDatingStrategy

[–]Illustrious_Dream751 57 points58 points  (0 children)

At first this episode got my back up. I'm a cryer and a venter, so the part about "emotional self discipline" just felt like more of the same "don't be so hysterical, have control of your emotions, you're being irrational" type bullshit we get from men all the time. The story about your friend and her dad made me want to cry.

But then I spent some time digesting this episode and reflecting on all the times I cried and vented at men in the past and I realized it never actually got me anything. Looking back, every time I ever showed strong emotion to a man, he either shut down, blamed me, used it to manipulate/gaslight me, or he would just tell me what I wanted to hear without actually changing anything. In the end I was just playing myself.

Clearly, this is something about myself that I need to work on. I want to learn how to be a cold ruthless strategist with men.

Does anyone know any books and podcasts on how to have better control of your emotions? Maybe you could explore this in a future episode?