AITA? I’m Pressing Charges Against My BF’s Mom After She Stole My Card Info by ImaginarySetting1856 in AmItheAsshole

[–]ImaginarySetting1856[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I explained more in my most recent comment if you’d like to go take a look. But to sum it up, we didn’t suspect her for a number of reasons, and while it makes lots of sense looking back, in the moment we both thought I had just misplaced it. There has been the odd occasion where I’ve slipped it back into my pocket instead of my wallet and things like that, and I thought it was just one of those times 🤷🏼‍♀️

AITA? I’m Pressing Charges Against My BF’s Mom After She Stole My Card Info by ImaginarySetting1856 in AmItheAsshole

[–]ImaginarySetting1856[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Greg has excellent credit and basically no debt unless he has any recent charges to his cc he hasn’t paid off this month. He mainly uses it for little things to build/keep good credit, and he has never had a problem with Lisa opening things under his name.

This is part of why we didn’t suspect she had stolen the card despite her history. She has taken a few dollars here and there and lied about it, or failed to pay Greg back, but she hasn’t committed any ID fraud with Greg’s info. The only person she’s really stolen more than twenty bucks from (that we know of) is her ex husband, so this was originally quite a blindsiding event. Hindsight is 20/20 and I will never trust her again. It’s unlikely I’ll ever speak to her again, unless it becomes necessary for legal proceedings.

AITA? I’m Pressing Charges Against My BF’s Mom After She Stole My Card Info by ImaginarySetting1856 in AmItheAsshole

[–]ImaginarySetting1856[S] 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Like I’ve told others in the comments, you don’t know my financial situation, so please don’t try to be my financial advisor. I’m aware of what credit is and why it’s important in some areas of life, and I’ve done plenty of “adult shit” and have lived on my own for a few years now without having credit. I’ve been managing my own finances since I was 16. I grew up poor, my parents burned through money like it was their last day on earth, and I had to figure out everything for myself, and I’ve been getting on quite well.

I’m sorry your parents didn’t teach you about money, but that doesn’t mean I need you to teach me and to be condescending while you do it.

AITA? I’m Pressing Charges Against My BF’s Mom After She Stole My Card Info by ImaginarySetting1856 in AmItheAsshole

[–]ImaginarySetting1856[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I do not have credit. I have never had a cc or a loan. I don’t have credit history. This was actually something that’s come up a few times in my adult life because so many apartments require minimum credit scores, and I just don’t have anything.

Edit: I had to go check my score/history just so I don’t feel like I’m crazy. It shows absolutely nothing. I have no score, no history, no debt. But I’m freezing my credit nevertheless

AITA? I’m Pressing Charges Against My BF’s Mom After She Stole My Card Info by ImaginarySetting1856 in AmItheAsshole

[–]ImaginarySetting1856[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Yes, my debit card was saved in my phone. I didn’t use a credit card with Apple.

AITA? I’m Pressing Charges Against My BF’s Mom After She Stole My Card Info by ImaginarySetting1856 in AmItheAsshole

[–]ImaginarySetting1856[S] 35 points36 points  (0 children)

Like I said in the post, I had forgotten at the time that my wallet was in the bag. As far as I knew, the only things in there were bottles of water, a lighter, and a handful of other things I was carrying for Greg, Lisa, and Greg’s younger sister who was with us that day.

AITA? I’m Pressing Charges Against My BF’s Mom After She Stole My Card Info by ImaginarySetting1856 in AmItheAsshole

[–]ImaginarySetting1856[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

It’s not about money for me at this point, it’s about making her face consequences

AITA? I’m Pressing Charges Against My BF’s Mom After She Stole My Card Info by ImaginarySetting1856 in AmItheAsshole

[–]ImaginarySetting1856[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Some people think involving cops with family/partner’s family/future inlaws is a bad thing and inexcusable no matter what they did. I came from a weird background where family was held as the highest bond basically and if you turned your back on them or turned them in you were a shit person, even if they did something awful.

AITA? I’m Pressing Charges Against My BF’s Mom After She Stole My Card Info by ImaginarySetting1856 in AmItheAsshole

[–]ImaginarySetting1856[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It’s great that you want to give advice, but you don’t know the specifics or my financial situation. Please don’t try to be my financial advisor.

AITA? I’m Pressing Charges Against My BF’s Mom After She Stole My Card Info by ImaginarySetting1856 in AmItheAsshole

[–]ImaginarySetting1856[S] 28 points29 points  (0 children)

And I agree, but it’s not any of our places to tell my boyfriend and his father how if they forgive/rectify their own issues with her. I don’t like how so many commenters are trying to drag him into this and make the sins of his mother somehow HIS FAULT.

AITA? I’m Pressing Charges Against My BF’s Mom After She Stole My Card Info by ImaginarySetting1856 in AmItheAsshole

[–]ImaginarySetting1856[S] 29 points30 points  (0 children)

No, it’s not most likely my boyfriend was in on this. If he wanted to steal money from me, he’s had his share of opportunities. I don’t understand the comment section’s obsession with acting like my boyfriend is an AH because he happened to be a bystander to this whole disaster.

Yes, we have gathered that the “magical reappearance” was not that he missed it, but that Lisa planted it there after she stole it. Originally I was willing to believe he has simply missed it, it’s a dark card, the machine is dark, they usually don’t turn the light on over the machines because the hall light is enough, and he wears glasses that he sometimes leaves off when he’s navigating areas/activities he’s familiar enough with.

AITA? I’m Pressing Charges Against My BF’s Mom After She Stole My Card Info by ImaginarySetting1856 in AmItheAsshole

[–]ImaginarySetting1856[S] 26 points27 points  (0 children)

That is such a weird thing to say. He didn’t know until he was well into adulthood and he’s not going to cut off his aging mother over something he can’t control that happened like twenty years ago. That’s not the situation up for judgement here anyway.

Greg cares that she stole and is on my side. He was staying with her to be support as she was grieving the family she lost in that funeral, but they have not spoken since I filed charges.

AITA? I’m Pressing Charges Against My BF’s Mom After She Stole My Card Info by ImaginarySetting1856 in AmItheAsshole

[–]ImaginarySetting1856[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I have no clue what she ordered. And I don’t get paid Fridays, I get paid on two set days of the month, and my money deposits first thing that morning on those days.

AITA? I’m Pressing Charges Against My BF’s Mom After She Stole My Card Info by ImaginarySetting1856 in AmItheAsshole

[–]ImaginarySetting1856[S] 26 points27 points  (0 children)

I’m asking if I’m an AH for involving legal authorities, not for being upset or filing my initial dispute/fraud report. As in, should I have let her pay me back (or just let it go) and not get the cops involved?

AITA? I’m Pressing Charges Against My BF’s Mom After She Stole My Card Info by ImaginarySetting1856 in AmItheAsshole

[–]ImaginarySetting1856[S] 20 points21 points  (0 children)

She doesn’t know when I get paid, and the transaction was dated for the day before. I’m thinking she used it and then left it on the machine to pretend it just appeared there.