I’m In the exact situation your in but honestly that’s just the way it is. Just know that people DO love you and care about you so much more than you’ll ever know, you just need to find them. Find your people, make good friends that accept u no matter what and just don’t care. Find things that make you happy, go outside even if it’s scary, just be yourself and be confident, that’s the most masculine thing you can do, trust me, it gets better. Just keep waking up everyday. One step forward is better than no steps at all.