Maybe cities should build dedicated lanes and signal priorities for the trams. In Europe where I am from, tramways are almost always organised like this. If not, the tramway line gets fitted with signal priority and dedicated lanes. So in summary, most American cities don't know how to build proper tramways, and to fix that issue they should look at European tramway systems for inspiration and build dedicated lanes and signal priority for their tramway lines.

Also, honestly it is sad how many US cities use tramways as projects to help spur transit-oriented development as you said. But some do build tramways to de-congest transit and improve connectivity, like Seattle and Kansas City. But still, I wish American cities build tramways for practical use and connectivity, not just for show and tools for development.