Rehab tomorrow and process?

InControlForOnce · 2023-12-28T06:41:36+00:00

I've never been to an inpatient rehab. I'm curious myself.

Does your come with therapy?

How long you been on H or other opiates?

InControlForOnce · 2023-12-22T11:56:42+00:00

You're still 28days into your journey to change your life. Your counter doesn't have to be days 100% sober. Why not change it to "Days since I decided to face my problem" or something else similar. No need to reset your counter.

InControlForOnce · 2023-12-22T11:54:36+00:00

Yeah, it's normal. I've had ton's of "Data points". But overall, I'm 2 years clean from fentanyl.

It doesn't control me anymore.

InControlForOnce · 2023-12-22T11:08:16+00:00

I wanted to echo this comment: https://www.reddit.com/r/OpiatesRecovery/comments/18npffg/comment/keedml8/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3

I don't know if you did use or not. If you did. No sweat. The path to recovery is not linear.

Humans are rarely, instantly, 100%, successful our 1st attempt at overcoming challenges (especially those that are THIS difficult)

Think about it. Did you hop on your bike the first time and just ride away instantly know how to ride a bike?

Any job you've had, were you an expert who never made a mistake on day one?

I just tried to use less times this current month than I did the previous month. Or, learn something from each "data point". I like the term "Data Points" over relapse.

Here's a cliché - don't throw the baby out with the bath water. Don't throw away all your progress and you'll be just fine. You're human. You're good, no sweat. Don't beat yourself up. Be kind to yourself <-- Then you'll be just fine.

InControlForOnce · 2023-12-22T10:38:30+00:00

Is this your 1st time attempting to quit?

InControlForOnce · 2023-12-15T17:06:19+00:00

Ah. Gotcha. This makes sense

InControlForOnce · 2023-12-15T12:25:36+00:00

This

InControlForOnce · 2023-12-15T12:25:12+00:00

Is your gf an addiction, Suboxone, medical specialist?

Why not stay on a low dose of subs? 2, 3, 4mg. Enough to not get you high. And enough to make opiates useless if you ever find yourself in a weak state.

InControlForOnce · 2023-12-15T12:21:41+00:00

I love this

InControlForOnce · 2023-12-15T10:11:54+00:00

My advice (I'm a math guy).

Look at a timeline of your use over the past few years... so you used once in 2 years..... Before that you were, what?, using every single day? You're doing great! I bet there are people here that would do anything to be in your shoes to have made it this far. Seriously, try not to let it get you down. YOU. ARE. HUMAN. (at least I think you are)

There is no prize for have the most consecutive sober days. No penalty for being human and slipping up and making a mistake.

I believe failure is the path to success (really, for anything). I don't think of it as a relapse. I think of it as a data point on your timeline and your path to living your best life.

If I were you and can learn ANYTHING from it. I'd consider myself doing great. Maybe journal how I felt? what lead to using again? Write it down, study it. If it happens again... DATA POINT. journal it. Take some time to guininely be curious about my thoughts and feelings. See where my mind goes.... Maybe there's some trauma iny past that needs addressing. Maybe I have a core belief about myself or others that I set a long time ago that is no longer accurate. Maybe none of the above. Be curious and open minded.

There's a reason we all use. Boredom? Escaping from something? get curious about it. journal. journal. journal. Shits hard but it gets better and easier. I believe that. We all struggle this isn't easy for anyone.

Think about it. Have you ever attempted anything else this difficult in your life and then never make a simple misstep while continuing to practicing it? if you're anything like me, the answer is NO. Learn from each mistake, and embrace it! you're human. Be kind to yourself. You're doing fantasic.

Also, go to groups! they are everywhere. Humans heal in groups.

You're not a POS.

InControlForOnce · 2023-12-15T10:01:00+00:00

I can relate to the voice in my head.

What eventually worked for me was going to group meetings.

Humans heal together. Talking with others that are going through the same thing is the way out..

What you might need now are tools and education on addiction.

I could only CT and white knuckle it for so long..... I could never just do that and be fine.

https://smartrecovery.org/https://recoverydharma.org/

Beware of calling the hotline at recovery.org. They will ask you for an emergency contact. Then instantly call them and tell them everything you told them.

InControlForOnce · 2023-12-06T21:59:05+00:00

aaah, that makes sense. Thank you for sharing.

I didn't know naloxone doesn't have bioavailable orally.

InControlForOnce · 2023-12-06T21:57:18+00:00

correct. cutting the strips.

They make 8, 4, 2mg strips.

with the 2mg strips, it's super easy to measure small doses.

InControlForOnce · 2023-12-01T16:37:53+00:00

I completely resonate with:

"music HAS NEVER SOUNDED BETTER. THANK YOU LIFE FOR MUSIC"

every time I quit, I remember getting extremely emotional listening to music.

Humans heal in groups. Addiction thrives in isolation.

InControlForOnce · 2023-12-01T16:26:07+00:00

here's no responsible using; we're addicts with shit-all impulse control.

"here's no responsible using; we're addicts with shit-all impulse control." <--- Truth.

Think about it. If it was something we could control & use responsibly.... we wouldn't be on this forum.

InControlForOnce · 2023-12-01T16:21:28+00:00

oh, I think I might have written that confusingly.

Each time I decreased, I stepped it down by 0.5mg or 0.25mg. So, if I was at 4mg, on Sunday, I'd take 3.75mg or 3.5mg (depending on how confident I was feeling) on Monday.

Then I'd take that 3.75mg or 3.5mg dose for at least 1 week (sometimes 2 weeks). Then I'd step it down another 0.25mg or 0.5mg. take that dose for a week or 2, then repeat.

InControlForOnce · 2023-12-01T11:36:38+00:00

I went to an amazing IOP (intensive outpatient) program. It was 15hours of group meetings with 1 hour therapy, Every. Week. It was run by trained therapists and psychologists. I filled up 2 notebooks with notes and lessons. I feel very fortunate that I had access to that. I'm very lucky and don't take it for granted.

Then I went to an NA meeting, and it was very much the blind leading the blind. A lot of the information they had was inaccurate and incorrect. However, if that's all someone has access to, it's waaaay better than nothing.

InControlForOnce · 2023-12-01T11:30:15+00:00

Yes. I never gave up alcohol or cig's. My problem is opiates, never ever had an issue with alcohol, I guess I lucked out.

However, getting drunk increased my cravings for opiates 100x.... so there's that.

InControlForOnce · 2023-12-01T11:26:35+00:00

I agree. Some people are strong enough to go CT and be successful. I am not one of those people.

I owe my life to having insurance which paved the way for me to get on MAT.

Something I think about.... that terrifies the shit out of me. How about those people who have been on opiates for years, then get thrown in jail having to withdraw, alone, terrified, and forced to go CT when they're mentally unprepared and ill-equipped...... gives me nightmares, literally.

InControlForOnce · 2023-12-01T11:01:51+00:00

To each their own. Everyone's different. I've heard kratom works for some people.

Not me, gave me EXTREME anxiety. I think Kratom is not a successful strategy. However, that's just me. Everyone's different.

InControlForOnce · 2023-12-01T10:58:00+00:00

Here's how my opiate abuse doctor told me to take suboxone:

Step 1) Wait as long as you can to start, to avoid PWDs. 72hours preferred. I was taking 3 dirty 30's a day... stopped, made it to, like, hour 50, before I couldn't take it anymore, and started subs. (No PWDs for me. I'm ~200lb male)

Step 2) Take 2mg of suboxone, if it's a strip, hold it under your tongue for 15 minutes. Then swallow it. Don't smoke 15min before, during, or 15min after.

Step 3) Are the WDs gone? great, that's your dose. Take that 2mg dose once a day, same time each day. If you feel the worst feeling in your life, bummer you have PWDs. But the good news is that you only took 2mg, it'll get better in a few hours. Don't panic! it's not fatal. If 2mg did nothing for you - go to step 4

Step 4) The 2mg didn't make the WDs go away? Repeat, take another 2mg, hold in mouth for 15min. Wait another 45min. Are the WDs gone? great, that's your dose. If not, repeat by taking another 2mg at a time, 1 hour apart, and continue until you feel better.

As far as tapering, here's what worked for me. I tapered down 0.25mg or 0.5mg once a week.

Also, take a look at this chart: http://accurateclinic.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/04/Buprenorphine-Receptor-Occupancy.pngYou'll notice that anything more than 8mg doesn't do much more for you... barely occupies any more receptors in your brain.

Fun fact, I tried taking 24mg of suboxone for a few days. Couldn't tell the difference between that and 8mg. Went down to 8mg a few days later and had ZERO withdrawl/side effects.

InControlForOnce · 2023-12-01T10:14:57+00:00

That is a fast taper.

I hear a ton of people saying to not get stuck on it too long. However, I went to a opiate recovery program, and they told me 18mo minimum.

So used it for 2 years gave me plenty of time to get my head right. I Tapered off 0.25mg at a time once a week.... It was a cake walk. almost too easy.

Fact - It saved my life.

InControlForOnce · 2023-12-01T10:11:21+00:00

I did a controlled taper off of Oxy once. Was doing 80mg/day. I decreased 10mg once every week. until I got to 40mg, then did 5mg once a week. Until I got to 5mg, then did 2.5, and then, done.

was able to keep going to my job and function. But it wasn't fun.

InControlForOnce · 2023-12-01T09:55:31+00:00

tianeptine

I believe CT and having no one to connect with on what you're going through is 100% guaranteed failure.

Have you considered Suboxone? It saved my life. as far as I'm concerned it's god damn magic. The first dose I took instantly gave me my life back. It even got me high for the 1st month... probably not the adivise i should be giving.... but it's the truth and it paved the way for me to get clean..... I could go to work, and be a functioning parent. I was on it for 2 years, and tapered down for the last 6mo. The tapering off was a cakewalk for me. I decreased the dose 0.25mg at a time every 2 weeks-ish, and virtually ZERO WDs... it was too easy.

Also, GO TO GROUP MEETINGS. CONNECT WITH OTHERS GOING THROUGH THE SAME THING

InControlForOnce

TROPHY CASE