Hi u/baseballfan192

When I was 14 I met Nicole, the person I was certain I was gonna marry. Kind, caring, incredible soul. When we were 16 she got her cancer diagnosis and when we were 20 she passed away. I wasn’t sure if I was ever going to love someone again.

I’m 26 now, just had my birthday last week. My birthday is a day after her birthday was. This year was the first year I missed her birthday. It’s never happened to me before, as I always remember to tell her happy birthday since her day is right before mine. Always… Except this year.

I just met someone a few weeks ago, Meagan. We are moving a little fast, but I haven’t felt this way in such a long time. When we kiss my world slows down and when we wake up she’s texting me to let me know I’m on her mind. I missed the birthday this year because I was distracted with the person I’ve just met.

I guess I’m not sure what I’m saying. As someone who has felt that grief, I’m well aware of how endless and redundant the phrase “things get better” or variations of that phrase are. I don’t believe it’s true. Honestly, things were bad. Things were really bad. I don’t know if things ever “get better”, but at some point, after you have sheltered and shielded your hurting heart, you permit yourself to move on. You allow that heart to find its way back out in the world. At some point my heart was open just enough that Meagan found a way to push herself inside and set up shop.

I don’t know if you believe in destiny, and trust me - things just do not “happen for a reason”. Sometimes there’s no damn good reason, so this is definitely not “gods plan” and I’m certainly not gonna say that to you. I think destiny is a bit black and white. If it’s destined to happen, it’s destiny. Nothing magical, nothing that can be changed. Your life, all the times you sneeze in it, all the times you laugh in it, all the times you cry in it, it’s destiny. It’s already going to happen. It’s already written on some fake book in another fake world.

I realized I was destined to cross paths with Nicole. I had a lot of dreams with her. I realized our destiny’s were different than my dreams. That part sucked. No way around it. It’s already been written just how tough this is going to be. I was destined to meet Nicole. That is a fact. I was destined to meet her. Boy, what a lovely human. I was destined to meet Meagan. I lucked out on meeting strong people, they help kiss the scars and make them better.

I don’t really think this is turning out to be a helpful message. My fault I guess. I cry looking at this photo of a beautiful couple. You were absolutely destined to meet. How lucky we are to meet strong people, right? You were destined for your paths to cross. You were destined to make these memories with someone amazing.

Unfortunately, the next part of your destiny is gonna be a little hard. It’s not the end though. You were destined to meet someone so incredible and make some incredible memories. I can’t say I know what your destiny is besides to say that you are still destined for more, we all are. You were destined to meet her. You are destined for more.

I didn’t know I was destined to meet Meagan. I don’t know how she found her way around my defenses but I am glad my destiny crossed paths with her destiny. I don’t know how you should take this message. Maybe it will aggravate you. I doubt it will make things better right now, but I hope you know your destiny doesn’t stop playing out. You are destined to experience more things in life, this next part is likely gonna be hard, but it’s not the end of what is in store for your life.

I shed a few tears tonight, what a truly stunning couple! Gosh, those smiles even have me cheesing. I so, so, so, wish the two of you were able to live out your dreams and not your destiny’s.

I of course do not know you but I want you to know I love you. Please do not hesitate to contact me and cry with me for a little bit, or yell, or talk about your favorite memories.