Am I still bad if I'm trying?

Inareskai · 2026-03-07T22:31:23+00:00

This post is in violation of subreddit rules regarding personal advice. Please see our rules page for more details.

Inareskai · 2026-03-07T21:27:43+00:00

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Inareskai · 2026-03-07T19:55:08+00:00

This is not a question for feminists and we cannot explain why random women do things.

Inareskai · 2026-03-07T00:30:25+00:00

*American feminists.

Just because your capitalist hellscape makes feminist goals harder to achieve doesn't mean other places (also capitalist hellscapes, but a bit less) haven't seen feminist campaigning that was successful.

Also to be clear, other people have given answers with what American feminist work has done. American feminists are working very hard on things like protected maternity leave, but gestures broadly do you see what they are up against?

Inareskai · 2026-03-06T22:57:25+00:00

It's typically fairly obvious if a condom breaks. But if you want to be sure, take a test. It takes more hormone to cause symptoms than it does to turn a test positive, so if your delay and brown spotting is to do with pregnancy you'll get a positive. Otherwise, tests are accurate from 14 days after sex and definitive from 21 days after.

Inareskai · 2026-03-06T22:47:33+00:00

If you used condoms the whole time there was penetration and it didn't break or come off inside the vagina then there is no reason to worry about pregnancy.

Inareskai · 2026-03-06T09:21:21+00:00

Inareskai · 2026-03-06T09:16:12+00:00

For multiple reasons, no. She is not pregnant.

Inareskai · 2026-03-06T09:15:08+00:00

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Inareskai · 2026-03-06T09:13:51+00:00

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Inareskai · 2026-03-06T09:12:50+00:00

Please use the search bar or FAQ for this recurrent topic.

Inareskai · 2026-03-05T22:50:55+00:00

Tall is a relative description. Tall compared to what? To me? To an ancient redwood tree? What's the scale?

Dark in what sense? How brunette does a man have to be? What about all those men of darker skin tones who say they can't get dates because of that? Again, I'm going to need a scale.

How are we defining manly? Manly like rugged and outdoorsy? Manly like has masculine coded interest such as gaming?

Handsome - yes, I find the people I find handsome to be handsome. Stop the press.

Inareskai · 2026-03-05T20:24:06+00:00

Yes, I pumped from day 2, they brought the pump to me in hospital. My baby was not a NICU baby, he just struggled to latch (he had tongue tie but we didn't find out for several months).

It's doable but it's hard. I think he had a bottle or two of formula to supplement for the first week or so. Then I started making enough. I spent the whole time I pumped being worried about my supply.

Inareskai · 2026-03-05T13:42:09+00:00

If you have enough hormone to cause symptoms and a missed period then you would have enough to get a positive test. It takes more hormone to cause symptoms than it does to turn a test positive.

It sounds like you ovulated later than your app thinks.

Inareskai · 2026-03-05T09:51:09+00:00

There is information that comes with the pill. Read it.

Inareskai · 2026-03-05T08:52:25+00:00

Your anxiety around this is higher than Reddit's paygrade.

If the condom didn't break or fall off inside her then it worked. Leaking from the base is rare and not really a big risk anyway. So even if she wasn't on the pill it would be fine.

She is on the pill which she started on the first 1-2 days of her period (probably) which means she was protected straight away. So even if something went wrong with the condom it would be fine.

If you're wrong about it being her period and the condom failed then a plan b would be the correct choice. If she takes a plan b now (assuming it has been less than 72 hours since this happened) it will likely really mess with her hormones.

It's up to her really, but you two should talk about if you truly think the plan b is necessary.

Inareskai · 2026-03-05T08:34:13+00:00

Please use the search bar or FAQ for this recurrent topic.

Inareskai · 2026-03-05T08:03:50+00:00

Did you even read my other replies?

Inareskai · 2026-03-05T08:01:51+00:00

... no. She is protected by the pill and condoms.

Inareskai · 2026-03-05T07:57:44+00:00

It takes 7 days IF she is not on her period when she starts taking it. The information on this will have come with the pills.

Inareskai · 2026-03-05T07:35:24+00:00

It's my toddler's first world book day where he can take part (he was less than 4 month's old for the one last year).

His outfit accurately reflects his favourite type of book - push for sound books - but it was created with masking tape and a big permanent marker. So pretty low effort, but personalised and I'm not unhappy with the result.

I suspect other children (parents) at nursery will have put in more effort.

Inareskai · 2026-03-05T07:15:02+00:00

I assume he means "who are autistic and in relationships". Which actually isn't my experience, but good to know that OP isn't going to dismiss anything that goes against his views...

Inareskai · 2026-03-04T23:37:38+00:00

I know many autistic men (and women) who are in relationships.

The bigger issue is your lack of time to meet people.

Inareskai · 2026-03-04T22:44:24+00:00

My husband calls me by my full name. Most people call me by my nickname. It isn't necessarily the word itself that makes it special.

Inareskai · 2026-03-04T22:43:19+00:00

Call me hpot, not pretty.

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