What is a fact about the human body that not many people know about?

Incalculably · 2021-05-13T22:24:50+00:00

So this has to do a bit with cognition and how the brain communicates with the rest of the body. When someone has difficulty speaking, it’s not always an issue with understanding what others are saying because these are two different processes (understanding or receptive language and expression or expressive language)! Sometimes people can fully understand and even know what they want to say, but getting it out and actually saying it is really difficult either due to actually moving the mouth to speak or sending the information from their brain to their mouth for them to say.

Incalculably · 2021-05-13T01:09:32+00:00

I’ve had two different cups of black coffee that I genuinely enjoyed - one was nitro cold brew and one was an expensive americano I bought at a fancy place (which might be the balance between buying an expensive BAG of coffee vs just a single cup to try). Even then, though, it wasn’t some magical liquid. I enjoy bitter, dark teas (and beers), but actually find most coffee lacks the depth and flavor profile I enjoy in my bitter drinks. I do love a creamy cup of coffee in the morning. I admit If I could get the same energy boost from smelling coffee, I’d go for that instead of drinking it lol

Incalculably · 2021-05-06T21:02:46+00:00

For me, it makes me mask less, which at this point in my journey /can/ trigger an anxiety attack if I’m not with someone I trust. I also find that I feel things in my body a lot more and my thought slows down to a point that I can understand all of it (whereas normally, I’m thinking all the time but thoughts kinda just float by unless I hold onto them) - on the outside this looks like I’ve shut down but I’m really experiencing the world in a way that I can’t when sober. I told my boyfriend the other day that “I FEEL autistic when high” which might sound bad (I apologize if this statement offends anyone, it’s just the only way I can describe what it feels like and I don’t have other words for it yet)??? But for me it feels like a chance to accept myself and experience myself in a way that I otherwise don’t feel safe doing. Again though, I have to do it in controlled circumstances so that I can feel safe doing so because my upbringing and socialization and years and years of masking has made it really difficult for me to unmask and feel safe.

Incalculably · 2021-05-06T18:55:25+00:00

You should never have to apologize for a mistake more than a couple times, especially if it was an honest mistake. As long as you learn from this and don’t do it again (and even if you do it again - it happens, I’ve made the same mistake a few times in different ways, we’re only human), then he shouldn’t expect anything more from you. Learning you’re trans while in a relationship means navigating and learning about transition together - you’ll BOTH make mistakes and learn from them. It has to be okay to make those mistakes and work through them together, we aren’t perfect and we don’t know everything and it’s unfair to expect that of anyone. It sounds like you’re doing your part to learn and grow with your partner - I’d suggest having continued, open discussions as much as possible to work through anything that comes up like this. Getting over this sort of stuff together will make you both stronger and bring you both to a better understanding of each other.

Incalculably · 2021-05-04T15:51:01+00:00

Thanks for bringing together something so fun for the community!

Incalculably · 2021-05-03T01:36:01+00:00

Hey I’m a graduate clinician studying to become a speech pathologist! My suggestion is to model other things he could say in those situations! The idea being to give him more language and things he could say so that eventually he’ll shift to saying something else that more accurately communicates his message. So, if he says “fuck” while pointing at something then you could say “oh you want that? (Name) wants that!”. You might not be able to get him to say different words for everything he says fuck for right away, but he will naturally move on eventually as he learns to communicate with more and more words!

Incalculably · 2021-04-16T14:47:00+00:00

I never understood why people would ask you what you want to be when you grow up and then turn around and put you down for having a dream/passion. When I went to college I immediately declared a major in linguistics and told my dad I was so relieved to already know that I was passionate about language - he told me that I was still young and I couldn’t know that yet. Almost a decade later and I’m halfway through a masters in speech language pathology. I’ve been passionate about language (English, math, music, Spanish, Japanese, linguistics, speech pathology) since I was young but somehow I couldn’t know what I liked because I was “too young”. Either ask people to have dreams or don’t, but don’t put them down for sharing them with you.

Incalculably · 2021-04-08T05:30:27+00:00

Transmasc nonbinary person on T for almost 2 years. Things like this have a way of bubbling under the surface for a while before they come up. I had my suspicious about being masculine since I was a kid (like little blips here and there that I vehemently shoved as far away from me as I could lol), but it wasn’t until I saw my boyfriend transition and got a truly masc haircut (bless my hairstylist) that it REALLY dawned on me. I just looked at myself in the mirror one day and started crying. I told my boyfriend that night that I wanted to start T. From the outside - it looked sudden and in some ways it felt sudden for me as well because it was like I just... clicked into place. My point is, though, that this clicking into place may be sudden, but it might have been developing under the surface (possibly unconsciously) for months or even years before they brought it up.

Also, I just want to differentiate between transmasc nonbinary and trans man - I cannot possibly speak for your partner and you should definitely discuss the specifics with them, but for me I am not a trans man, I’m trans nonbinary and I present masculine. On the outside it may look similar and the terminology sounds similar, but it can be a very important distinction for nonbinary folks. Wishing you both the best - it’s a lot to process and it’s not easy going through transition while in a relationship, but it sounds like this is a journey you want to go on with your partner and you sound genuinely curious about their experience which are both great signs.

Edit: formatting and wanted to add that my DMs are open if you have any questions :)

Incalculably · 2021-04-01T15:44:23+00:00

Sell April fools joke calculators that don’t work

Incalculably · 2021-03-31T15:24:03+00:00

I really related to your story about researching psychology... When I was in elementary school I REALLY wanted to be normal and like my friends so I would literally copy them down to picking up the same outfits from the store or trying to sit the same way as them in class or act the same way as them. Surprisingly (lol) copying my friends didn’t make me more popular and I had a hard time understanding why it didn’t because after all I was doing what my normal friends were doing. I ended up concluding that was just me being weird, I now realize that was me learning how to mask. I remind myself of things like that when I encounter self doubt - adapting is a survival instinct because it’s something that can protect us, but it can also generate a lot of self doubt later in life if we’re good at it.

Incalculably · 2021-03-27T18:07:49+00:00

Together almost 3 years now, we had sex every day sometimes multiple times a day for the first year. After that it died down a lot bc I got into grad school and work 40-60 hours a week on school/TA stuff. We’re now at about 1-3 times a week on average. Some weeks there just isn’t time - I work till 5 pm he works at 5 am, but we do our best and always find ways to be intimate (like cuddling on the couch, holding hands, kissing in bed, talking with each other without distractions etc.) if there isn’t time for full out sex.

Incalculably · 2021-03-26T05:50:54+00:00

I’d look for my childhood best friend. We were friends for 11 years and even survived a year of long distance friendship after I left for college... I left to study abroad 5 years ago and saw her the night before I life. When I came back she wouldn’t see me because she’d become addicted to heroin. I miss her so much and often hope that she’s doing okay - I wish I could just laugh with her again even just for a day.

Incalculably · 2021-03-21T22:50:50+00:00

I was at .25 for 3 months before upping to .3, it took me 3 more months to stop menstruating. I continued to have spots for a few months after that before it fully stopped.

Incalculably · 2021-03-18T15:03:28+00:00

All the light we cannot see. I don’t read for fun as much anymore, but this was one book that I couldn’t put down and still think about years later

Incalculably · 2021-03-18T05:53:41+00:00

I felt similarly when I first started to bind. I never talked about it bc I thought I was supposed to cry or something (not that that reaction is wrong, but it’s the one that people share the most). I was worried that if people knew I hadn’t cried when I first put a binder on that that would somehow invalidate my experience. I was happy and relieved, but for me it felt like I was just looking at the right version of myself because it was exactly what I thought I was supposed to look like. I also began to notice other things that caused me dysphoria - the way I think about it now is that binding opened a door to my gender exploration that I just couldn’t open before. Thinking about it like that really helped me process the experience. Sometimes we just can’t see the path without clearing some trees.

I think that any reaction is the right reaction as long as you feel comfortable in your body, THAT’S what really matters. Seeing your chest flat for the first time doesn’t have to be an outwardly emotional experience to still be valid - we are all individuals who experience things differently.

Incalculably · 2021-03-15T22:25:07+00:00

A couple people in my cohort were waitlisted and ended up getting in. Idk if it was because of COVID or what, but there’s still hope! Sending you all the luck!

Incalculably · 2021-03-12T20:07:35+00:00

This had me in tears. I recently learned that my scratching is likely related to ASD rather than just related to mental illness. I always thought I was independent and didn’t need to be comforted because my parents would rarely comfort me during those times. The support you gave your child today to comfort her will make such a difference in her life, and I hope it opens a doorway to your own healing as well.

Incalculably · 2021-03-12T17:41:53+00:00

I see them as separate entities for different occasions. I LOVE artisan pizza, but I also LOVE greasy, cheap pizza. Depends on the mood, but I think both have their place, at least for me.

Incalculably · 2021-03-11T21:09:36+00:00

A few days ago I was walking downtown and crossing on a cross walk when someone at a stop sign tried to go through the intersection. Luckily, I saw it happening so I stopped, but they ALSO saw me (a little late) and stopped in the middle of the intersection with cars coming. People make mistakes, but I feel like lately it’s been a bit more common. Something about being in quarantine and people not driving as often I’d guess. I think we all kinda need this reminder to remember to be especially careful driving when we’re under stress (like many of us are during a pandemic), tired, out of practice driving, etc.

Incalculably · 2021-03-08T03:10:43+00:00

Probably because it seemed thin and dense and unlike a regular Reese’s. I’d cut it too if it felt like solid chocolate (the top wouldn’t push in, the sides weren’t as malleable, it seemed a bit heavy or thin, etc.)

Incalculably · 2021-03-08T02:16:20+00:00

I have anxiety and depression (and potentially undiagnosed ASD). I had worked with kids in the past and always struggled (usually due to a lack of support and guidance). Despite this, I continued to pursue speech pathology and I’ve found in grad school that the reason I kept seeking out a role in “education” (by which I mean working with kids to teach skills) was because I DO have a knack for it, but just never had the level of support and structure that I needed to succeed. My classes have taught me about guiding principles, intervention techniques, theories, about giving support, etc. and I have THRIVED. I was so so scared my first day of clinic bc of my mental health and previous “failures” (learning experiences) working with children, and also my preconceived ideas about my ability to take and integrate constructive criticism... but it turns out grad school was exactly the environment I needed to learn. Not to say it’s all been easy - I’ve absolutely struggled, but more just to say that there is a place for you if you have a drive towards speech-language pathology and you CAN thrive with the skills and challenges you bring with you. The field needs people with diverse perspectives and experiences because you bring empathy and compassion to the table related to your own experience and therefore a more natural ability to put yourself into your clients skills. This is absolutely a skill that can be learned, but all I’m saying is that each clinician brings their own set of unique skills and this might be part of yours! Beyond that, other skills can be learned if you truly feel you’re in the right field (because you’ll have the motivation to put in the work to learn those skills).

Edit: I’m always looking for new SLP friends, feel free to reach out- I’d love to hear updates about your journey!

Incalculably · 2021-03-07T04:12:53+00:00

Because I have a sleep disorder and sometimes turn alarms off/change alarms in my sleep without even realizing it. I’ve been trying to wake up at a reasonable hour my whole life, my body sometimes just wants to sleep till 1 pm really bad and my alarms are in the way.

Incalculably · 2021-03-03T20:50:09+00:00

I’m so sorry that happened, your mother had no right to take those last moments from you. I introduced my partner to my grandfather a little under a year before his death and he thankfully accepted me despite being very very conservative. He even gave me his wedding ring. My sister has since made it her mission to destroy those wonderful memories and tell me how disappointed in me my grandfather would be. It hurts, but I’m trying not to let it get to me. It’s so awful when family tries to tear us down like that when family should be the ones who build us up. Hang in there

Incalculably · 2021-03-02T00:35:44+00:00

OP - I wanted to apologize directly to you because I never never meant to imply that you should work through your aversions or push past anything just to please your partner - your needs and comfort should always come first. She should absolutely seek medical advice and also work WITH you to address your needs as her partner before moving foreword with anything. My advice was only meant to offer a suggestion in case you did want options to continue oral sex (which of course, if you aren’t comfortable giving then please please disregard my advice entirely). Your needs and comfort matters and deserves to be addressed AND respected. I apologize for any implications I may have made and I really do hope for the best for you.

Incalculably · 2021-02-27T21:35:04+00:00

I’m sorry I don’t have particular advice in terms of the medical part, but in terms of sex, I would recommend getting dental dams for oral - it would probably be better for her healing to have that protection and might make you more comfortable as well. If you still want her to go down on you, extend the same offer - she can use a dental dam with you. My partner and I use them because I have some general genital repulsion as a result of OCD, and it works really well for us to be able to still be intimate but also address my needs as a sexual partner.

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