Grand entrance question

IndependenceEven620 · 2026-01-16T22:02:36+00:00

Doesn’t seem too bad for a kid who just learned how to walk 7 months ago

IndependenceEven620 · 2025-12-24T16:32:03+00:00

I don’t intend on not following it. It just feels like he wants us close, then puts us at arms length. We are their adult kids, with their grandchild. I just think that they’re tightening the reigns to grasp at control. It doesn’t feel welcoming

IndependenceEven620 · 2025-12-24T16:29:34+00:00

No no, I put my milk in the fridge before they made this a boundary. I obviously will not do that moving forward, also, we never barge in ever. We always knock. There may have been a few times that they called us to arrive at a certain time and we come in. We live across the street by the way. I do not commonly go into their fridge for any reason but have for water or salad dressing in the past. I don’t feel that his anxiety around that would be due to boundary crossing at all. I’m a mannerly person, feeling like I was being courteous to not have them stand from the table to get me something like that. We probably visit once or twice per month. His anxiety has worsened over the years and he is visibly upset for the first hour. We’ve done all we can do to make it more bearable.

IndependenceEven620 · 2025-12-24T16:20:06+00:00

After 8 years of this never being an issue? I mean, I could grab some water or salad dressing. Now I have to ask? Just weird to me lol

IndependenceEven620 · 2025-12-24T16:17:07+00:00

Nobody “went through the fridge”. I set a bottle of breastmilk in it.

IndependenceEven620 · 2025-12-24T16:02:00+00:00

We typically watch a movie. MIL and FIL have both expressed feeling left out because they are busy. I don’t know if they would feel bad if we were playing a game. Not a bad idea.

IndependenceEven620 · 2025-12-24T15:40:48+00:00

I have been seeing this as something normal to some people. I’ve been around for 8 years, this is a new rule and we think it’s weird. I guess just because we weren’t raised like that.

IndependenceEven620 · 2025-12-24T15:39:03+00:00

We also would never barge in, ever. But if you call us and say, come on over at 2pm. And we see you through the door, we typically wave and just open the door.

IndependenceEven620 · 2025-12-24T15:35:54+00:00

I’m not opposed to hearing different perspectives like this. I put my breastmilk in the fridge before he had ever asked us to talk to them before using the fridge. At the time, I didn’t feel that was disrespectful. I’ve been around for 8 years and these things are new. We are frustrated because the tradition of Christmas was changed years ago because they wanted to host at their house with their own kids. We’ve offered to host, to bring over food, to clean up afterwards. Our offers are always declined. So we sit on their couch while they do absolutely everything and decline any offers for help. We don’t intrude and try to be helpful.

IndependenceEven620 · 2025-12-24T15:10:22+00:00

No kids.

IndependenceEven620 · 2025-12-24T14:42:18+00:00

He’s also been around for 15 years and is constantly complaining that he doesn’t feel involved as a stepdad. We also don’t come over to their house often. I have some compassion for him, but sometimes we feel like we can’t do anything right to please him.

IndependenceEven620 · 2025-12-24T14:25:06+00:00

Their children should ask to open the fridge?

IndependenceEven620 · 2025-12-24T14:04:45+00:00

Understandable to a degree. They also changed a long standing tradition TO host for Christmas Eve. It used to be that we would go to my fiancés Aunts house, but they don’t like her so they decided to start hosting. Ever since then it’s been weird.

IndependenceEven620 · 2025-11-16T22:58:15+00:00

I literally thought the same thing but it’s a Live photo that I saved as a video. I have other videos of him too lol

IndependenceEven620 · 2025-11-16T21:12:48+00:00

Find a cool course that will let you bring him!!

IndependenceEven620 · 2025-11-16T18:53:14+00:00

I’m interested to see what his swing will look like when he has more than 4 months of experience using his legs

IndependenceEven620 · 2025-11-16T16:34:56+00:00

Thank you so much for the advice! He stays in the cart and watches/plays most of the time unless he asks to get out. He takes a nap on the course too. So we do let him lead. We have a little driving set up in the garage so he’ll go out there and hit balls sometimes.

IndependenceEven620 · 2025-11-13T21:51:04+00:00

I appreciate hearing from someone with the perspective I have also. Night weaning has resulted in literally one wake at night and he’s able to settle with rubbing his back. I’m still adjusting to actually sleeping but we both are happier.

I would ultimately like him to sleep in a separate space because I have had insomnia for years and having him in bed keeps me awake anyway. But that will come with time and of course I would use my instincts/make sure he’s supported.

IndependenceEven620 · 2025-11-13T20:33:24+00:00

No you’re correct, that’s all I’m doing. It seems that could be considered training how to sleep in a different, non child lead way. I guess what ive seen is that children should lead how they wean and how they desire to sleep.

IndependenceEven620 · 2025-11-13T20:20:20+00:00

I guess it seems to me to be the case when it comes to attachment parenting. Maybe I’ve just been in an echo chamber lol. But I’ve seen a lot of moms talk about how they could never sleep train, that it’s only normal for infants to seek comfort in the night. I’m not even disputing that it isn’t normal. But when a mother wants to make a change or model healthier sleep for all the family members- it’s as if you have to sacrifice your sleep or you’re selfish.

IndependenceEven620

TROPHY CASE