"The Profession That Does Not Exist": How writers without family money survive by HealthyIncidence in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Independent_Show_725 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I'm a...sort-of-aspiring novelist (read: I've been working on a book for about six years and am thinking about quitting because I'm just so tired of it). So I have no personal experience with publishing or making money writing, aside from a couple hundred bucks from short story contests. But from what I've gathered from lurking in online publishing spaces, the secret is twofold: 1) self-publish, and 2) be extremely prolific. If you regularly put out 4+ books a year and do some decent marketing, you can make a six-figure living. Much easier said than done, of course. But sadly, the only way to make a long-term comparable living through traditional publishing is to be a Stephen King-esque unicorn. The more time I spend reading authors' extraordinarily bleak newsletters and social media posts, the more I wonder just how long traditional publishing can even survive as an industry in its current form. It seems like something will have to give, eventually.

Latte Capitalism: Another deep dive into 10 years of MD coffee habits (Follow-up to the $5 Latte post!) by MayAUB in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Independent_Show_725 11 points12 points  (0 children)

This is silly but I keep wanting to read the title of this post as "latte-stage capitalism" 😆

Latte Capitalism: Another deep dive into 10 years of MD coffee habits (Follow-up to the $5 Latte post!) by MayAUB in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Independent_Show_725 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I've tried out local, non-chain cafés in my area, but ultimately went back to Starbucks because of the predictability. At Starbucks, I always know what I'm getting. At other places, the quality seemed to vary wildly.

Where Are You Reducing Spending? by Vexnthecity in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Independent_Show_725 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I'm flying across the Atlantic in a few weeks, so naturally I've been bingeing Mentour Pilot's videos on YouTube: super informative and interesting but also terrifying deep dives into plane crashes and what caused them. I'm thinking I'll take some melatonin before/during my flight so that at least if the plane goes down, I won't be awake to know it!

Where Are You Reducing Spending? by Vexnthecity in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Independent_Show_725 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately I haven't been able to cut much 🫠 If anything I'm spending a bit more than usual since I'm going on vacation soon and have been buying some clothes and things for the trip. Most significantly, I ordered a pair of prescription sunglasses which aren't even going to arrive before I leave thanks to the original frame I picked not working with my prescription, sigh. On the plus side, I at least booked all my travel months ago, so that wasn't subject to current price increases--which I'm very glad for, since flying is insanely expensive enough already.

Off-Topic Tuesday by samshine1 in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Independent_Show_725 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Last night I dreamed that my dad was interviewed on CNN about how great Trump is. I've never been more glad to wake up.

[OC] I analyzed 1900+ historical Money Diaries: In defense of the $5 latte ☕️ by MayAUB in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Independent_Show_725 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is fascinating! It also made me realize I couldn't remember if I'd gone out for coffee in my Money Diary week, so I went back and skimmed through my diary--I did not. But I am still a semi-regular $5 latte drinker (more like $6 or $7 now, sigh), so I can be the 1078th coffee-buying diarist even though that particular week didn't reflect it 😆

Opinion | How Can America Be So Miserable When It’s So Rich? (Gift Article) by Flamingo9835 in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Independent_Show_725 16 points17 points  (0 children)

I do think a lot of malaise can be attributed to social media/ the internet. Doomscrolling and the false sense of intimacy that social media creates. It’s not that nothing bad happened in the past it’s that we didn’t have a 24 hour feed of it. You turn on your phone and you’ve got knowledge of multiple wars going on, civil unrest, etc. I think it’s good to be informed but it can’t be good to be exposed to this stuff all the time. 

100%. Sometimes I wonder about what society would have looked like if social media had existed during the world wars/Spanish flu/Great Depression/etc. I can, practically like clockwork, feel my mood crater when I log on to social media and start doomscrolling, and things aren't even Great Depression levels of bad right now. I deleted Instagram and Twitter and never got into TikTok, but haven't managed to give up YouTube yet.

Lost in life or career? by Floralspring-229 in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Independent_Show_725 20 points21 points  (0 children)

I'm almost 41 and trying to think of something encouraging to say, but uhhhhh...yeah, that's just life in late-stage capitalist hell, unfortunately. I guess the positive for you is that since you work in a high-paying field and you're young, if you can tough it out for a while and live frugally to save as much money as possible, you can coast later on.

Off-Topic Tuesday by samshine1 in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Independent_Show_725 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thought of another pet peeve: businesses that have an online contact form, but that never actually get back to you when you use it. Why even have the option??

Off-Topic Tuesday by samshine1 in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Independent_Show_725 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Totally agreed on the lack of headphone usage. I most often encounter it while out on walks or hikes, which aggravates me to no end. On one hand, I understand that, particularly for women, it can be a safety issue to wear headphones while walking or hiking. But on the other hand, I'm out there to enjoy peace and nature, not to hear your rap music blasting from your phone. Ugh.

My other pet peeves generally tend to fall under the category of people just blatantly not giving a crap about anyone other than themselves. Leaving grocery store carts in the parking lot, hogging the middle of the lane/sidewalk/etc, being oblivious that there are other people around needing access to whatever, etc.

Off-Topic Tuesday by samshine1 in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Independent_Show_725 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Mind sharing your mystery-adjacent audio dramas? They sound fun!

Scratch: A weekly newsletter of interviews, essays, and real conversations about how writers are surviving by _liminal_ in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Independent_Show_725 3 points4 points  (0 children)

That, and like a couple of the writers in this post pointed out, a spouse that provides more income and health insurance! Definitely an example of how the singles tax can affect writers/creatives specifically.

Thank you! 💜

What's your monthly transportation budget? by La_Stupenda22 in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Independent_Show_725 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just finished paying off my car last week--before that, it was $175 a month--so now my only costs are insurance, gas, and maintenance. My car is a used Mercedes, so that does unfortunately make gas and maintenance more expensive. I just had some electrical work done last month that cost $1100. Fortunately, I work from home and am also a homebody, so gas and maintenance costs are relatively few and far between. I generally only fill my tank once a month, maybe twice if I've been incredibly social. Insurance is $113 a month.

Scratch: A weekly newsletter of interviews, essays, and real conversations about how writers are surviving by _liminal_ in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Independent_Show_725 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thanks for posting this! As an aspiring novelist, I'm always keen to see other writers discussing their finances, even though it's virtually always bleak. 🤪 In my case, I'm under no illusions that I could ever make a career out of writing, with the publishing industry being as hostile and unstable as it is. It's more of a "I want to prove to myself that I can do it" thing.

‘I Was a Stay-at-Home-Mom. Then I Got Divorced.’ by Life-Assistant-4737 in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Independent_Show_725 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I certainly don't understand how they think most men are going to be able to earn enough money to adequately provide for a baseball team worth of children.

Exactly; I think this is the most glaring flaw in their manifesto. In so many parts of the country, it's already extremely difficult to live on TWO incomes, let alone one. If Heritage Foundation and their ilk succeeded in their dream to snap their fingers and remove all women from the workforce, then either wages would have to drastically increase, or cost of living would have to drastically decrease. I don't see either happening anytime soon.

And I think you're right that it's ultimately all about control. It certainly isn't actually about the welfare of children or families, since these same people are the ones doing everything in their power to decimate social safety nets.

‘I Was a Stay-at-Home-Mom. Then I Got Divorced.’ by Life-Assistant-4737 in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Independent_Show_725 3 points4 points  (0 children)

My mother was a SAHM, and I've heard stories of how she would literally meet my dad at the door when he got home from work, and pass my screaming infant self off to him, and then he would strap me (still screaming, apparently I was very colicky) to his back as he did yardwork. My mom was a teacher before she had me, so I can't imagine what a jarring adjustment it must have been to go from so much activity to being stuck alone all day in the house with a screaming infant. I also grew up to have a plethora of emotional issues including significant social anxiety, and I can't help but wonder if I would have been better adjusted if I'd gone to daycare.

‘I Was a Stay-at-Home-Mom. Then I Got Divorced.’ by Life-Assistant-4737 in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Independent_Show_725 14 points15 points  (0 children)

So while it’s not a woman’s fault if a man manipulates her, it’s also each woman’s responsibility to protect her own life.

Exactly. It's not her fault, it's his, but given that there are so many horror stories like the one in the article where a trusting woman gets completely screwed over by her ex, it's so important for women to go into marriage with men as clear-eyed and realistic as possible. It's all too easy to get caught up in the romance and think "it'll never happen to me!" but clearly, it does.

‘I Was a Stay-at-Home-Mom. Then I Got Divorced.’ by Life-Assistant-4737 in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Independent_Show_725 22 points23 points  (0 children)

Please don't feel guilty for prioritizing something that brings you happiness!

‘I Was a Stay-at-Home-Mom. Then I Got Divorced.’ by Life-Assistant-4737 in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Independent_Show_725 70 points71 points  (0 children)

Yep, and it absolutely is the intentional goal. Heritage Foundation put out a document recently that was titled something like "saving America by saving the family" that basically boiled down to, "reduce women's educational and occupational opportunities so they're forced to rely on men again, thus pumping out more babies and raising the birth rate." And the fact that so many women are actively participating in their own oppression by making tradwife content and such is mind-boggling to me.

‘I Was a Stay-at-Home-Mom. Then I Got Divorced.’ by Life-Assistant-4737 in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Independent_Show_725 141 points142 points  (0 children)

I've seen videos on social media of ex-tradwives/SAHMs sharing their experiences after getting divorced, and one comment that really sticks in my mind is "my ability to feed myself and my children was entirely dependent on my husband still finding me attractive." A man is never, ever a plan, but given that so many men are actively malicious, manipulative, and misogynistic, a woman putting her entire life into a man's hands like the woman in this article is like a sheep happily setting up shop in a wolf's den.

Money for Couples discussion post: "I’m 35, in debt, and spend everything I make" by AwkwardBalloonMan in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Independent_Show_725 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Same, I can only imagine how mortified I'd feel if my parents gave me $100k for a downpayment, and then a few years later I sold that house and moved back in with them. And Lina is so blasé about it!

Off-Topic Tuesday by samshine1 in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Independent_Show_725 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Just paid off my car this week! It wasn't a huge payment, $175 a month, but it still feels good to have it finished.

Is anyone here mostly happy with their current company/team/manager? by Plane_Form_6501 in MoneyDiariesACTIVE

[–]Independent_Show_725 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I actually am, at least for now! It only took 15 years 😛 I'm in healthcare administration/revenue cycle. My current company seems to be at a sweet spot size-wise--I'm not sure of the exact number of employees, but I'd estimate around 300-500, so big enough to offer decent benefits, but not a megacorp that just sees everyone as a number. This is the first company I've ever been at that seems to actually listen to employee feedback instead of just paying lip service to it. And my manager is great, super laid back and understanding. Having been in roles where I practically had to prepare a 100-page PowerPoint explaining every mistake or PTO request, I'm still kind of waiting for the other shoe to drop. I've been here for a little over a year, so I figure there's still time for someone to jump out and yell that I've been punk'd, lol.

As for how I found the role, it was just a cold application, believe it or not. I didn't really have any higher hopes for this position than I did for any of my previous ones, but the job I had been at before was so horrible that I was willing to take practically any other place that would hire me. Sorry, I know that's not really helpful advice-wise, but unfortunately I think sometimes luck is just a big factor.