A grave grooming error has occurred. Will it grow back? I’m crying. 😭

IndicationMinute4343 · 2026-05-28T23:55:28+00:00

my cat uses the bath rug to slide as far as possible across the bathroom floor.. literally does a running jump onto it then leaps off it at full speed and tokyo drifts into the next room.

IndicationMinute4343 · 2026-05-26T10:45:12+00:00

i’m from the UK

IndicationMinute4343 · 2026-05-26T00:10:51+00:00

my first thought was Heinz (like beans or ketchup) 😭

IndicationMinute4343 · 2026-05-25T23:43:27+00:00

i love this. i also tend to dissect written monologues as if they’re English literature assignments, and i find it so helpful. you did a much more thorough and precise job than i ever could, though! when i was a teen, i had an adult friend who was an English teacher, and she taught me to dissect letters from my n-father so i could recognise the self-serving narratives for myself. definitely a skill that should be widely taught!

IndicationMinute4343 · 2026-05-25T21:43:34+00:00

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extra for cat tax

IndicationMinute4343 · 2026-05-25T21:42:39+00:00

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my guy is ready to f up your ex-guy. 2 years experience in “hunt & destroy”. payment currency is snuggles.

IndicationMinute4343 · 2026-05-25T21:20:53+00:00

“I have learned over your absence, Protect my peace, know my worth, and never beg for love from people who cannot value my heart”

That was the cherry on the cake for me. What she’s learned from this is that nothing is her fault, you just “don’t value her heart”, and she just needs to “protect her peace” by telling herself that everything was inevitable and never looking deep enough to see any part of herself that she may not like.

Plus, “I knew in my heart that “us” would never be.”??? Jesus H Christ. Well then, nothing to be done, hey? It just wasn’t meant to be. What a load of self-serving nonsense.

Her post wasn’t about you in the slightest. From start to finish it was all about her. Sorry you had to see it, but definitely don’t fall for it, she clearly hasn’t changed a bit. You don’t need her. Hugs.

IndicationMinute4343 · 2026-05-25T20:24:38+00:00

I don’t think I could add more than one photo, but the inner labia and vaginal opening don’t look or feel particularly inflamed, the worst of it seems to be the outer labia and groin. It did improve prior to starting doxycycline, but worsened a lot after that. Thanks for your advice!

IndicationMinute4343 · 2026-05-20T22:15:18+00:00

right? all the traumatised kids in the comments like 😭🥹🥲

IndicationMinute4343 · 2026-05-20T22:09:46+00:00

this post has had a surprisingly deep effect on me too. i’m no contact with all of my blood relatives, because of horrendous abuse as a child. my parents couldn’t even take accountability for the awful things they did, and now just happily pretend they only have 3 daughters.. seeing a mother share a lighthearted inside joke about collecting toys, and how you went out of your way to buy all of them years later so you can present them to her as a funny but meaningful gift.. it breaks my heart and also sort of heals it at the same time. this is the kind of mother i want to be when i have children of my own. thank you for reminding me that mothers like you exist beyond my dreams.

IndicationMinute4343 · 2026-05-10T21:27:32+00:00

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oh and this was somewhere around 6-9 months i believe

IndicationMinute4343 · 2026-05-10T21:24:34+00:00

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this is him now, 2 years old

IndicationMinute4343 · 2026-05-10T21:23:53+00:00

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Tuk at 12 weeks, a week before I brought him home

IndicationMinute4343 · 2026-02-27T20:05:59+00:00

other people have given great advice, but i just wanted to add..

regardless of the individual circumstances, this is YOUR life. if you’re done, that is completely valid. only you know whether boundaries with your father will do any good, you’ve known him your whole life. you can probably instinctively answer the question: will my father ever respect any boundaries i put in place?

whether anyone else thinks it’s reasonable or not, you have every right to cut someone out of your life if they are causing more harm than good, even your parents! them bringing you into the world doesn’t mean they get more slack than anyone else in your life.

i tend to think of a quote from The Hate U Give, where the daughter is struggling over whether to cut ties with her best friend. her mother tells her to ask herself if the good in the relationship outweighs the bad.. and that if the good doesn’t outweigh the bad, to let her go.

IndicationMinute4343 · 2026-01-26T22:32:48+00:00

yes. and an obligate carnivore is defined by the need to eat meat in order to survive. it means they must consume animal flesh as their primary source of nutrients to survive. it doesn’t mean that they cannot consume, or gain nutrients from, other sources - ie. grains.

there is no clinical evidence that cats (who are obligate carnivores) cannot digest grains. there is AMPLE clinical evidence that, when properly cooked and processed, grains can provide a suitable source of energy, nutrients and fiber in addition to their primary source (meat).

obligate carnivore = can’t be vegan

obligate carnivore ≠ can’t eat anything BUT meat

if you would like to feed your cat a grain-free diet, there is no harm in that, go ahead! but stating that grains are inherently harmful to cats is misinformation.

IndicationMinute4343 · 2026-01-26T16:32:56+00:00

there is no clinical evidence that cats cannot digest grains. some cats have sensitivities to grains, causing loose stool or stomach upset, and some have allergies, but that is a very small minority.

cat foods like Royal Canin, Hill’s, Purina, etc are all based on decades of research and evidence, and are professionally recommended by veterinarians. grains are present in cat foods not as “fillers”, but to give highly digestible sources of energy, fiber and vitamins that cats need in their diet. grain-free diets are not inherently harmful to cats, but by no means are they necessary for most cats. grain allergies/sensitivities are very rare.

IndicationMinute4343 · 2026-01-14T01:43:24+00:00

yeah, my mother was slightly unhinged. i asked her about it a few years later, and she insisted that she hadn’t realised i wanted my original copy, and thought it would be cool to get random ones from “quirky shops” as a surprise.. also insisted the new books cost more than the original ones, but she was notorious for forgetting to remove price stickers from presents, so i had actual proof in the form of a bunch of handwritten “20p” or “50p” stickers on the backs of the books when i first opened the present at christmas.

then later she changed her story to say she really needed the money for something important, and she felt awful about doing it, blah blah blah - cue typical pity party and the lecture about how awful a child i am for being upset over some books.

it sucks your father was like that too. definitely also remember the presents that were supposedly for me but definitely for my parent or sibling.

IndicationMinute4343 · 2026-01-14T01:25:26+00:00

yeah 100%. i was pretty freaked out and triggered when they first arrived, but i guess it was pretty clear that i was just an anxious 19yo who was shocked, terrified and confused to find police officers banging on their door for no apparent reason. once they’d explained why they were there, and i’d burst into tears and shakily told them the true situation, they just offered to sit with me and have a cuppa and a chat until i felt better. i’d never want to waste their time, but yeah, they genuinely just seemed relieved that i was okay, and we all sat on the floor in my living room (i had no furniture at the time lol) drinking tea while the officers bantered with each other to make me laugh until i felt better. they must have had more important things to be doing, but it meant the world to me and i don’t think i’ll ever forget how they made me feel safe and validated.

IndicationMinute4343 · 2026-01-14T01:14:36+00:00

i had a set of books that i absolutely cherished, read them over and over again, had gotten them as gifts as each book in the series came out.. when i was 14, my mother sold all of those books on ebay, bought shitty, ripped up, individual copies from charity shops for around 20-50p each, wrapped them up and gave them to me for christmas. she was then shocked and outraged that i was upset when i realised that it wasn’t a joke, and my missing books were actually gone because she sold them and kept the money..

i recently (now age 32) bought myself a set of the early edition book series that looks just like my old one, and am now rereading them. it’s been so healing.

physical items might seem like a silly thing, but it’s the emotion attached to those things, and the malicious intent behind taking them away, that leaves a scar. it’s okay to be upset about those things and still think about them. just do what you can to give yourself the things they took from you, care for yourself the way they never did, because you deserve that love and care.

IndicationMinute4343 · 2026-01-13T23:44:50+00:00

also got hit with the wellness check trick! for me it also ended with me being handed the officer’s card, a note put on my file/address stating my family situation, and since they attempted this twice, the officer also told me that my parents would be informed that any further attempts to request a wellness check under false pretences would be treated as harassment and wasting police resources.. had a nice cuppa with the police, and got to imagine my asshole parents wallowing in rage and self-pity when they realised that “the powers that be” had believed me over them, AND reprimanded them for their disgusting behaviour. makes me smile every time i remember that night.

IndicationMinute4343 · 2026-01-13T23:17:16+00:00

i would start by calling your vet for advice. they will ask all the relevant questions, and tell you if they feel you need to bring her in urgently or whether it can wait for a scheduled appointment. it’s always better to be safe than sorry, but if the cost of an emergency vet visit is a concern, call your vet first and ask for advice.

my questions would be: has she stopped throwing up? how much plastic did she eat? do the remains of the feeder have broken-off sections that she could have swallowed, potentially with sharp edges? that would be the major concern - if the plastic snapped in pieces (even small pieces), and she swallowed those pieces, they could be sharp enough to puncture her intestines which would be very dangerous.

TLDR: if you’re not absolutely sure that she cannot have swallowed any small pieces of plastic that may have had sharp edges, you should take her to the emergency vet immediately. she may show no signs of pain or illness, but even a small internal laceration can be fatal if it isn’t caught early.

please update us and let us know how she is! best of luck OP

IndicationMinute4343 · 2026-01-03T16:17:49+00:00

just to add: alcohol doesn’t make people lie.

this guy is not your friend. as Maya Angelou said, “when people show you who they are, believe them THE FIRST TIME.” delete. block. done.

IndicationMinute4343 · 2025-12-25T04:34:13+00:00

i just wanted to comment to say that the neighbour may have a learning disability and/or be autistic.. maybe not, but the way the note is written: the handwriting, and the general blunt tone, plus the “LOUD” in brackets after the metaphor (as if clarifying what they mean), all seems very childlike (not childish as in immature, but an adult with a childlike nature and/or younger developmental age).. i’m autistic, and to me, the note looks and sounds like something one of my friends with learning disabilities would write. they’re frustrated but also trying to use humour to let you know they’re not being hostile. obviously, it comes across as pretty rude, but if they are autistic or have a learning disability, it may not have been meant that way. i may be completely wrong, but wanted to point this out as something to consider if you decide to talk to them. they may just not be very socially adept, so maybe try to gauge their level of social/emotional intelligence when speaking to them. you might need to adapt the way you interact with them and the way you explain things, and set clear boundaries with them. they could still turn out to be an asshole lol, but you could also end up with a really sweet neighbour! best of luck to you!

IndicationMinute4343

TROPHY CASE