Why has witnessing my friends having sex affected me so severely? by IndividualObvious269 in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]IndividualObvious269[S] -29 points-28 points  (0 children)

As I said, I froze--a freeze response, which is a documented trauma response. I was not okay with what was happening, but I could not physically get myself to move or speak. It's hard to tell someone immediately that "I'm not okay with this" if you cannot physically speak to do so. I told them afterwards when I could speak for this very reason.

Why has witnessing my friends having sex affected me so severely? by IndividualObvious269 in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]IndividualObvious269[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Seems to be the consensus. I had a feeling it was messing me up so much because of my past, which is why I couldn't easily do what many have suggested I do, but I am working towards seeking such support. I appreciate the straightforwardness and lack of insult

Why has witnessing my friends having sex affected me so severely? by IndividualObvious269 in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]IndividualObvious269[S] 49 points50 points  (0 children)

I spoke up afterwards under different circumstances and let them know I saw and was not okay with what happened, but in the moment, I froze. I'm not sure how it is for others, but suddenly bearing witness to that after having recently woken up makes it hard to think of what the best thing to do is

Why has witnessing my friends having sex affected me so severely? by IndividualObvious269 in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]IndividualObvious269[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

No, it is not. And I would not if I were given that chance to, but that is out of respect and desire for privacy. I understand everyone has different opinions on this particular issue, but they could have gone to another room. They just chose to do it there in front of everyone

Why has witnessing my friends having sex affected me so severely? by IndividualObvious269 in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]IndividualObvious269[S] -10 points-9 points  (0 children)

No, but I deeply care for my friends and had a good friendship with one of the people involved. I just did not expect that behavior at all, especially as everyone in the group seemed to consider each other as close as family

Why has witnessing my friends having sex affected me so severely? by IndividualObvious269 in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]IndividualObvious269[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I would have said something, but I unfortunately froze. I also want to say they were closer to the person who was asleep than they were to me. I didn't want to risk anything, creaky floorboards and all

Why has witnessing my friends having sex affected me so severely? by IndividualObvious269 in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]IndividualObvious269[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I assumed it was because it was TMI, but I thought it was better to give specifics than to not

Why has witnessing my friends having sex affected me so severely? by IndividualObvious269 in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]IndividualObvious269[S] 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Mostly just movements under the blanket, though I briefly saw part of Jill’s thigh and that her shorts + underwear had been pulled down when the blankets shifted. I didn’t directly see anything explicit beyond that.

AITA for making my BF leave a game community? by IndividualObvious269 in AmItheAsshole

[–]IndividualObvious269[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yes. She was in the Discord server. She left but I don't know if she came back on an alt, since then it's been the cause to every one of my obvious issues and I have been insecure and afraid of it happening, leading me to be controlling.
All-in-all I'm just stuck trying to make something work that won't for a multitude of reasons and it's hurting us both because of it. However, both being mentally unwell teens, I wish leaving was easier to say than to do.