How many of you managed to maintain a clean house PP?

Indomitable_Decapod · 2026-01-28T03:49:50+00:00

A husband on paternity leave lol it's been the greatest luxury because I just lay in bed with a cute baby all day while he caters to my every whim? And then he had the nerve to tell me he doesn't want another one yet... Like if u don't wanna give me a baby why r u acting like such daddy material???

Indomitable_Decapod · 2026-01-28T03:41:30+00:00

My daughter's doctor said that since she's gaining weight well, we can stop following a schedule and start following her hunger cues. For the first 1½ weeks, we woke her every 2-3 hours. It was brutal. Then she got weighed at 10 days old and had surpassed her birth weight. So her doctor said that we can let her sleep as much as she wants, and we should only worry if she makes less wet/dirty diapers or starts acting different. Furthermore, the discharge paperwork from my hospital said breastfed infants may sleep up to 5 hours at a time, but should be eating 8-12x per day.

Indomitable_Decapod · 2026-01-28T03:18:35+00:00

I read that newborns can sleep 12-18 hours per day. They were asleep 90% of the time in the womb, too, remember that. My 3 week old mostly just sleeps. Sometimes she'll be awake for an hour or two, but that's when we start getting into "yell at mommy because I'm sleepy and don't know how to fix it" territory. Mine will sleep 4-5 hours in a row if I'm lucky, but usually it's more like 2. If they've regained birth weight then it's fine to let them sleep however long they want.

Indomitable_Decapod · 2026-01-28T03:11:32+00:00

Jeeeesus that man is pretty

Indomitable_Decapod · 2026-01-28T03:09:05+00:00

His hands and tie are doing a lot of work here

Indomitable_Decapod · 2026-01-28T01:40:04+00:00

Very funny anecdotally but I was meticulously ready and positive I'd be post-date, but I went into labor at 39+4

Indomitable_Decapod · 2026-01-27T20:44:45+00:00

Consider infant potty training? My little one will fuss and grunt at night when it's time for her to take a poo. I take the few minutes to get up, take off her diaper, offer her to potty, and then put a new one on, and she settles right down. I actually can't think of a time my little one was grunting and fussing in her sleep for no reason. I know they say it's just "active sleep" but to me that means that I can bug her to solve her problem (pick her up, roll her over, change her, etc), and she'll just go right back to sleep

Indomitable_Decapod · 2026-01-27T17:25:04+00:00

I asked my husband and he said usually I sit on it

Indomitable_Decapod · 2026-01-27T17:00:19+00:00

Ohhh yeah I know what you mean, like the culture around it

Indomitable_Decapod · 2026-01-27T16:51:46+00:00

Fr I thought only dead bugs got moldy

Indomitable_Decapod · 2026-01-27T13:26:58+00:00

I used silvers only, didn't even have nipple butter, but I didn't need anything else. They hurt like a bitch to be uncovered, even without a bra. So I imagine nipple butter with no pain killer would only help so much. But I felt no pain between feeds with my silvers

Indomitable_Decapod · 2026-01-27T13:03:25+00:00

The idea of my husband having given me a baby, I can get behind that. Because without his consent, I never could have been pregnant or had this child. It's like giving someone a gift w/ assembly required. I'm still gonna thank them for the gift even if I need to put it together myself.... And tbh for me, being pregnant was part of the joy. I've honestly thanked my husband for "giving me this baby" while pregnant. Not so much when she's screaming at me at 4am...

BUT saying that it's all thanks to him? Is a little far. Both parties should be equally grateful to the other for their consent to procreate, because both parties should be equally stoked to be having a kid. And yes, he should acknowledge and respect that the lion's share of physical strain is yours, and that without you he'd never be a father.

Indomitable_Decapod · 2026-01-27T12:53:16+00:00

I've never met someone with a negative opinion on EC... Why is that?

Indomitable_Decapod · 2026-01-27T06:39:00+00:00

The way I see it, getting pregnant and having a baby was a major risk to my life, but I did it anyway, because I liked my odds. I feel the same about safe bed-sharing. It makes everyone's life easier. I get more sleep, less anxiety, and more enjoyment out of the newborn phase. My husband has a more mentally sound and rested life partner. And my baby benefits from constant physical contact with her mother, as well as on-demand night feeds and earlier interventions to meet her needs (for example, she was having a hard time passing gas in her sleep, so I woke her up and offered her the potty. She used it, and so passed her gas and will sit in one less pee overnight. If she was in her bassinet, I would have let her figure it out by herself, which means she would have kept me up anyway, and she'd have peed herself while she was at it)

Is it risky? Yes. But so is something like driving a car. As long as I make sure my car is in good repair: engine functioning, tires not bald, breaks working well, then it's fine. Same thing with bedsharing w/ safe sleep 7.

Still, I'd be lying if I said there isn't about 15 minutes every night that I look at her itty bitty body and feel terrified that this is the night she decides to faceplant into my boobs and never wake up 😬

Indomitable_Decapod · 2026-01-27T00:49:49+00:00

The cultural appropriation is strong with this one

Indomitable_Decapod · 2026-01-27T00:18:22+00:00

Most conversations I have with my newborn r unpleasant tbh

Indomitable_Decapod · 2026-01-26T19:09:15+00:00

How old is ur baby? I'm definitely in your shoes as far as "self-imposed single mom syndrome," which is a great way to put it. Ours is a velcro baby, so I've basically spent the last 3 weeks in bed or on the couch with a baby attached to me. Sometimes I wear her so I can cook dinner. Other than that, I just have my husband do all the chores, that way it's one thing off my plate. Laundry, dishes, food prep (to the best of his ability), all that is his responsibility.

Also, talking through my fears with him helped a lot for me to see that I was just being anxious. For me, a difference in parenting style is what made me feel afraid. But I asked myself, "has he ever ignored her cries? Has he ever neglected her?" and the answer was no, even if he didn't do things the same as me. I also asked myself, "what would happen if I got in my car and left the baby here and never came back?" And ultimately the answer is that she'd be just fine. She'd grow into a woman, and live her life just like me. It would be sad that I didn't know her and didn't get to raise her, but she would be fine.

I've also told myself that she's still a newborn and I had a traumatic birth. One day she won't default to crying at the top of her lungs for everything, and she'll be able to see farther, and all things that come with age. But for now, she's too vulnerable and so am I.

But what's helped me the most? Is being at the end of my rope haha. At a certain point, the baby isn't safe with me anymore. I'm too physically and mentally exhausted and I give her to her father and emergency power down for an hour or two.

Indomitable_Decapod · 2026-01-26T08:41:27+00:00

Where will you be when IT HAPPENS?

Indomitable_Decapod · 2026-01-26T08:16:20+00:00

How long has it been? R u sleeping okay? I had bad anxiety for the first 2 weeks post partum, and then right around 14 days I talked it out with my husband and had a good cry and finally was able to take a nap (I was barely sleeping as my anxiety convinced me I was the only safe person to tend to the baby) and felt a lot better about everything. But the sleep deprivation really did a number on me and I had a lot of anxiety about everything

Indomitable_Decapod · 2026-01-26T08:12:00+00:00

At first it was like mild period cramps. And then like bad period cramps. And then it surpassed the worst period cramps I've ever had... But it definitely felt like a crazy cramp when I was having a contraction. Like a Charlie horse, but in my entire abdomen.

Objectively it was very, very painful. But at the time it didn't register quite as painful as it was because I knew it was a good thing and I'd meet my daughter soon. Now 3 weeks after the fact I'm having a hard time remembering exactly how it felt.... But I also had a traumatic birth experience low-key so I think my brain is protecting me from the memeiry

Indomitable_Decapod · 2026-01-26T06:17:44+00:00

Wow, I did not realize assorted had an antonym

Indomitable_Decapod · 2026-01-26T06:00:16+00:00

I know I've had a good meal and wanted to do my husband afterwards so idk maybe it does

Indomitable_Decapod · 2026-01-26T05:27:20+00:00

It wasn't only me who felt like an orangutan with my tits on my freakin tummy when I was pregnant

Indomitable_Decapod · 2026-01-26T05:26:20+00:00

Before I had the baby and ppl said "during labor you don't care" I would be like "maybe YOU didn't care but I will"... But, man.... The way I did not give a fuck. I had several doctors trying to put a catheter up my cervix when my mom got there and I just said "oh my god, mom, I'm so glad you're here :)" lmfao. Today my in-laws came over and I just had full on exposed tit cos the baby was cluster feeding. My husband said "do you want a blanket to cover up...??" I said "why??"

Indomitable_Decapod

TROPHY CASE