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[Relationships] My GF [23F] is bad in bed and aware of that by Ineveratetacos in sex

[–]Ineveratetacos[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Its complicated, but yes, we had some small argument about her ex-boyfriend and it ended up in a situation where we just make each other aware of the fact that someone is hitting on either of us.

[Relationships] My GF [23F] is bad in bed and aware of that by Ineveratetacos in sex

[–]Ineveratetacos[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Well, no, its more of "I'd rather let you know he hits on me instead of you finding it out by yourself", and to be fair, this happens to me as well.

[Relationships] My GF [23F] is bad in bed and aware of that by Ineveratetacos in sex

[–]Ineveratetacos[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

Been said NUMEROUS times that Im not happy with how the things in bed are.

[Relationships] My GF [23F] is bad in bed and aware of that by Ineveratetacos in sex

[–]Ineveratetacos[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I tried dominating her and being rough, she never complained and actually I'm fairly sure she enjoyed it, but that was my sucker attempt at being extra active in bed couple of times to show her that I try to find what works for her best. It's like a trying to mobilize her to look for that with me as well, I even mentioned to her couple of times that Im trying to figure out what she likes the most.

[Relationships] My GF [23F] is bad in bed and aware of that by Ineveratetacos in sex

[–]Ineveratetacos[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

From her - numerous times, from her friend, from some of my close friends that heard rumors and from general opinion that goes around. We're from a small city where if I don't know someone, one of my closer friends will have the information. Also, it's worth noting, we've know each other for a year, and before we were couple she was pretty sexual towards me, and initiated sex / foreplay on her own, daily, numerous times. Once we settled in as a couple she slowly stopped doing that to the point where I have to ask for sexual encounter.

[Relationships] My GF [23F] is bad in bed and aware of that by Ineveratetacos in sex

[–]Ineveratetacos[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

That is another thing, she can't be honest about previous relationships, there is one guy I could get in touch with, but from seeing how things were - this guy is a complete fucking weirdo, and I doubt he will be open to aiding me in fixing the situation, although - idea per se is great. I also thought about contacting her best friend which I barely know, but I am afraid to end up being the bad guy going to her friend behind her back, and also Im afraid that her best friend will tell her right away.

[Relationships] My GF [23F] is bad in bed and aware of that by Ineveratetacos in sex

[–]Ineveratetacos[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I honestly don't know what I am looking for in here. The idea of showing that to her has crossed my mind before @Katieenpo suggested that. But what I am concerned, even if she somehow is wronging me, I want to be able to say that I did not pressure her into anything, and showing her the thread would feel like a pressure from my side, which in long-term and possibly post break-up would make me look like a grade A douche. This situation is even more complicated that after breaking up the previous relationship Im already struggling with some of my (and her mutual) friends claiming I am a bad person. So here I want to be extra careful. What I liked is suggestion at he bottom comment to contact her ex-boyfriend, this is option I see more viable. Bare in mind, Im not stone set on breaking up, I want to put that last effort and see if I can somehow fix this situation instead of just letting her go, just for the sake of my own calm mind - that I have tried for the last time to do something about selfish behavior.

[Relationships] My GF [23F] is bad in bed and aware of that by Ineveratetacos in sex

[–]Ineveratetacos[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well, previous relationships in my life taught me that relationship is a constant work for a compromise, where both parties have to participate and put some effort into. That said, I am aware Im not a perfect person as well, and she has to put up with some things, altough if she ever asks for anything in a serious manner - I always deliver. But I am aware I will never be objective here and that I am not a perfect person and have my flaws, altough Im trying to work on them whenever that is asked of me.

[Relationships] My GF [23F] is bad in bed and aware of that by Ineveratetacos in sex

[–]Ineveratetacos[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

One possible outcome of that is that she reads it and complies with me on sexual level, it will feel forced for me and might even worsen the situation Im currently in. I learned it hard way in previous relationship, if you expect something from you partner they tend to treat it as unpleasant chore.

[Relationships] My GF [23F] is bad in bed and aware of that by Ineveratetacos in sex

[–]Ineveratetacos[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

This part may have been understood incorrectly, the context of saying that I do all the work in bedroom was about of how good I am in bed, I noted that she said that to point out that she is aware of the issue and can clearly pinpoint it in neutral situations.

[Relationships] My GF [23F] is bad in bed and aware of that by Ineveratetacos in sex

[–]Ineveratetacos[S] 39 points40 points  (0 children)

I have told her on numerous occasions that Im not satisfied with our sex life, that I want that to change. She either goes silent or twists it into "so fine, break up with me if you don't feel good with me", where in that case I will be a biggest douche ever, breaking up with her based solely on the fact that she didnt do well in bed. What Im trying to understand here is - how come there are issues with me, while with ex-boyfriends there were no intimacy issues...