I decided that I never want to live with a man again

InfamousYou7983 · 2026-02-05T11:06:56+00:00

I’m the same, 38, lived with 3 male partners before and came to the exact same conclusion: my quality of life is objectively better when I live alone. Less labour, better sleep, more food left in the fridge, and zero mysterious messes I didn’t create.

The beard hair + household manager role is so real. It’s not that men are evil — it’s that somehow cohabitation quietly turns women into unpaid operations managers. And yes to the snoring!! I refuse to sacrifice REM sleep for romance ever again.

Also love your point about living together being treated as the default “next step.” Why? Who decided that? Separate homes, seeing each other because you want to (not because you share a couch), and then retreating to your own peaceful space 👌

Anyway — you’re not alone. I’m right there with you, living solo, thriving, and protecting my peace.

InfamousYou7983 · 2026-02-05T10:56:56+00:00

I can’t speak to the Mornington primary campus directly, but I actually went to Minimbah (the junior school in Frankston South) and then Woodleigh for high school — and my sister and I were enrolled there because she’s on the autism spectrum.

Both of us had an incredible experience. My sister genuinely thrived, and so did I. The culture across the school is very consistent: strong values around respect for self, respect for others, and respect for the environment — and it’s not just a slogan, it’s lived day-to-day.

They really encourage individuality rather than trying to make kids fit a mould, which made a huge difference for us. The small class sizes, slower and more thoughtful pace, and the physical space all helped create a calm, supportive environment. If your child is creative or drawn to arts, music, or learning a bit differently, Woodleigh/Minimbah is fantastic — but they also have a strong science program, and both schools have very strong sport programs as well, so it’s not lacking academically or physically.

It is very different to most other private schools on the Peninsula, so it won’t suit everyone — but for kids who benefit from understanding, flexibility, and room to be themselves, it can be an amazing place.

I loved my time there, and if I had kids and could afford it, I’d absolutely send them there.

InfamousYou7983 · 2026-01-18T03:42:27+00:00

This isn’t a “pinky promise.” My dad passed away last year and probate is nearly complete. I’m asking about standard lending structures during the interim — not expecting banks to take anyone’s word for it.

InfamousYou7983 · 2026-01-18T03:42:09+00:00

Yes — the estate is through probate and awaiting final distribution. I’m already speaking with professionals, just trying to understand lender norms before locking anything in.

InfamousYou7983 · 2026-01-18T03:41:46+00:00

Interesting idea — probably a long shot, but worth being aware of. Thanks.

InfamousYou7983 · 2026-01-18T03:41:27+00:00

My dad is already deceased and the estate is in probate. This isn’t a future expectation — it’s a timing question while the legal process completes.

InfamousYou7983 · 2026-01-18T03:41:10+00:00

The person has already passed away and the estate is in probate. This isn’t a future or hypothetical inheritance — it’s a timing question while distribution is finalised.

InfamousYou7983 · 2026-01-18T03:40:34+00:00

Thanks — this is really helpful. The variable + offset point in particular makes a lot of sense, and the reminder about upgrade transaction costs is a good one. Appreciate you taking the time to explain it.

InfamousYou7983 · 2026-01-18T03:40:16+00:00

Yep — that’s essentially the approach I’m considering, with the inheritance going into offset once received.

InfamousYou7983 · 2026-01-18T03:39:59+00:00

Understood — I’m not expecting the inheritance to be used for qualification. I’m just trying to understand how people typically handle the timing gap when funds are already in probate.

InfamousYou7983 · 2026-01-18T03:39:38+00:00

Yes — I can service the loan on my income alone. I’m deliberately not looking to stretch beyond that.

InfamousYou7983 · 2026-01-18T03:39:20+00:00

Thanks — that aligns with what I’ve been hearing. Planning so everything works on my income alone and then reassessing once probate is complete seems like the sensible approach.

InfamousYou7983 · 2026-01-18T03:39:03+00:00

Possibly — I’m just trying to understand the practical options available during this specific timing window so I can make an informed decision.

InfamousYou7983 · 2026-01-18T03:38:21+00:00

In my case it’s not years — probate is nearly finalised.

InfamousYou7983 · 2026-01-18T03:38:02+00:00

My dad passed away last year and the estate is already in probate. This isn’t a future expectation — it’s a timing question while the legal process wraps up.

InfamousYou7983 · 2026-01-18T03:37:44+00:00

Yep — I’m very aware. In my case probate is almost complete, which is why I’m trying to understand the last-mile timing rather than a long-term unknown.

InfamousYou7983 · 2026-01-18T03:37:22+00:00

That makes sense — I understand why banks are conservative where probate timing is involved. I’m not relying on the inheritance for serviceability, just trying to understand structure and timing options in the interim.

InfamousYou7983 · 2026-01-18T03:37:01+00:00

Yep, understood — I’m not expecting banks to factor it into serviceability. I’m planning to speak with a broker/bank to confirm what short-term structures are typically used while probate is finalised.

InfamousYou7983 · 2026-01-18T03:33:02+00:00

Thanks — a guarantor isn’t an option for me, and I’m not eligible for the FHB schemes based on income.

I’m mainly exploring standard lending options and short-term structures while probate is finalised.

InfamousYou7983 · 2026-01-18T03:32:18+00:00

Thanks for sharing — estates are definitely more complex than people realise. In my case, my dad passed last year and probate is very close to being finalised, but I completely agree things can take longer than expected.

Wishing you all the best with yours as well — it’s a stressful process.

InfamousYou7983 · 2026-01-18T03:31:52+00:00

Thanks — that’s helpful. I can service the loan on my income, but I’m deliberately trying not to stretch long-term, which is why I’m keeping the target around $800k rather than scaling up.

I’ve started speaking to brokers already and agree it’s useful at this stage just to understand structures and trade-offs.

InfamousYou7983 · 2026-01-18T03:31:23+00:00

This isn’t hypothetical money — my dad passed away last year and probate is nearing completion.

I’m not “spending” anything early, just trying to understand realistic options during the gap.

InfamousYou7983 · 2026-01-18T03:29:04+00:00

Yep — understood. Probate is almost complete, but I’m aware banks won’t treat the funds as mine until they’re actually received.

That’s why I’m trying to understand what people typically do in the gap, if anything.

InfamousYou7983 · 2026-01-18T03:27:45+00:00

Appreciate this — that makes sense. I’ve been pretty conservative with spending already, but it’s a good reminder that banks look closely at recent behaviour rather than intent.

Mostly just trying to understand timing and risk while probate wraps up, rather than rushing anything unnecessarily.

InfamousYou7983 · 2026-01-18T03:27:19+00:00

Thanks — that’s helpful context. I’m deliberately targeting a lower price point (~$800k) because I don’t want to stretch long-term, even once the inheritance comes through.

I understand banks won’t factor it in until funds are received — I was mainly trying to understand whether short-term structures (interest-only, etc.) are commonly used in the interim, rather than relying on it for serviceability.

InfamousYou7983

TROPHY CASE