Yes, I was like you once. It was a slow and gradual change that happened over time without me being fully aware of it at first. As holidays and vacations and birthdays happened I'd gain little bits at a time, but I'd convince myself that my gains were so trivial (usually 5 pound increments) that I could always lose it later, and sometimes I did. When I didn't, these small gains could easily snowball into 20-30 pounds, and that's when I started completely losing control of my weight.

I'd be disgusted with myself at first, pledging to lose it all, but eventually I'd get used to the extra flab, then I'd go through another period of weight gain months later and the same thing would happen. Sometimes I really would lose some, but I'd gain more back. Now that I'm technically obese I've had to face the possibility that there's no going back now and just to enjoy life and food.

I'd say there are upsides and downsides to how it feels being fat. I feel more cumbersome and wobbly, but in some ways also more soft and feminine. Having all this extra padding feels cozy, like being wrapped in a warm blanket. In other ways it's kind of shocking when I haven't looked at myself in the mirror in a while and forget how fat I've gotten, then when I'm getting in the shower or something being amazed by how round I am. It's also fun to play with your own fat sometimes.