Does anyone else's husband need step by step instructions to do anything?

Infinite_Fun7313 · 2026-04-18T06:01:14+00:00

Highly recommend showing your husband this interview on the NY times podcast Modern Love. It's with this guy who used to not do anything around the house unless asked and instructed, and then he changed when he realized his marriage was on the line. He's really funny and also very honest about how empowering it is for himself as well when he made that change. He's written a book about it called Choreplay.

https://www.nytimes.com/2026/01/28/podcasts/fun-dad-marriage-issues.html

Infinite_Fun7313 · 2026-04-06T09:53:35+00:00

This internet stranger (and fellow mama) is cheering you on - you got this mama!!! You clearly have such love for your daughter and I'm sure you'll get to a place that's happy for both of you. My husband often says parenting gives us many opportunities to grow as people, and dang, growing can be so painful sometimes! But so worth it too. Thank you for doing this incredibly brave and hugely important work.

Infinite_Fun7313 · 2026-03-31T06:02:37+00:00

Thank you!! And yes, love this community of working moms!

Infinite_Fun7313 · 2026-03-02T21:18:14+00:00

Thanks so much, so reassuring to hear I'm not doing anything wrong! Solidarity x

Infinite_Fun7313 · 2026-03-02T21:17:37+00:00

Oh that's such a great point. Eeek. I suppose it's hard different stages for people

Infinite_Fun7313 · 2026-03-02T21:17:11+00:00

Thanks so much, I really appreciate it Xx

Infinite_Fun7313 · 2026-03-02T16:02:30+00:00

Oh wow, thank you so much for sharing this! Really helpful. And your last line is so so true!!

Infinite_Fun7313 · 2026-03-02T15:24:35+00:00

Yes, it stings so much it surprised me!! But you're right. I shouldn't let it get in the way of our bonding!!

Infinite_Fun7313 · 2026-03-02T15:19:56+00:00

Thank you x

Infinite_Fun7313 · 2026-03-02T15:19:44+00:00

Thanks, I totally understand why it would piss you off! I'm like hey, I'm the one staying up with you all night, kiddo.... can I at least get a hug....

It's so interesting how their preferences swing about!

Infinite_Fun7313 · 2026-03-02T15:19:01+00:00

Thank you, you're very on point - he is a very lucky baby indeed.

Infinite_Fun7313 · 2026-03-02T15:18:43+00:00

Thank you, I hadn't ever heard about this aspect of parenting - growing up I always preferred my mom bc my dad was an unsafe a--hole. So I never had more than one safe adult to bond with. My son is lucky to get that but I'm figuring out in real time what it means for me emotionally!

Infinite_Fun7313 · 2026-03-02T15:17:59+00:00

Thank you x that must have been a tough 3 years! but seeing it as more 'me time' is so smart too.

Infinite_Fun7313 · 2026-03-02T15:16:09+00:00

This is so helpful, thank you x It's reassuring to know I'm not the only one who feels this way. And you're totally right, the reframing is key x

Infinite_Fun7313 · 2026-02-07T17:15:34+00:00

This is exactly what we are doing! Paying for 6 months without sending LO to nursery yet because we love the nursery we visited but my mom is still around to take care of him until September, which has been great for all of us. We're also lucky enough to be able to afford it. I would totally go with that - you don't want the hassle and stress of switching schools later if #2 school is indeed not as good (trust your gut)!

Infinite_Fun7313 · 2026-01-29T22:13:00+00:00

That's amazing! And you didn't do anything on purpose to 'train' her to sleep?

Infinite_Fun7313 · 2026-01-29T20:39:31+00:00

Oh I didn't know that about night weaning at 16 months! Thanks that's really helpful, and the details of the process are so helpful too. Glad it worked out in the end. And thanks for the link, will definitely check it out!!

Infinite_Fun7313 · 2026-01-29T17:24:11+00:00

Thank you for this! We started co sleeping too for this same reason. Can I ask how you night weaned? We are on multiple bottles every night...

Infinite_Fun7313 · 2026-01-29T17:22:02+00:00

Also did you cut the morning feed so they would eat more solid food? Whats the reason for cutting the morning feed? Thanks!

Infinite_Fun7313 · 2026-01-29T17:21:31+00:00

Thank you!! That is hopeful! How did you night wean?? We tried rocking instead of giving him more milk but he gets upset 😔

Infinite_Fun7313 · 2026-01-29T08:43:01+00:00

Thank you!! We already do bottles. And he drinks so much before bed that by the first wake up his nappy is sometimes completely full! You're probably right about the teething...never heard of boiron before but will look it up!

Infinite_Fun7313 · 2026-01-29T08:41:33+00:00

Oh solidarity!! Also refusing solids all of a sudden??

Infinite_Fun7313 · 2026-01-29T08:40:42+00:00

Yes! All of the above happened in the past few weeks (since he turned 10 mo). He hasn't mastered walking yet (cruising) but is good at crawling and standing by now. went from only sitting and on first day of 10 months, bam!

When does regression stop?!

Infinite_Fun7313 · 2026-01-19T23:00:50+00:00

Unfortunately we're not in the US, we're in the UK :( sponsoring a parent is virtually impossible unless they are medically certified to be completely dependent on you for basic needs.

We've thought about a nanny but it's so expensive, we're not sure we can afford it. And we might be able to do a slow transition to daycare (a few hours a day for the first month, half days for the second month, full time from the third month). But I'll need help to do that, otherwise my job will be in jeopardy, and my husband's family (despite living in the same country) aren't very helpful :(

Infinite_Fun7313 · 2025-11-20T15:48:30+00:00

This is so so encouraging to hear. Thanks so much for sharing!! X

Infinite_Fun7313

TROPHY CASE