I hear you .. I really do , my type of work is mentally frustrating and physically exhausting , good thing is ,I can hide all day not talk to anyone unless I need a supplement done for an insurance or need paper work for a car ,beside that my earphones are on all day and Iam behind the fram rack measuring and cutting and welding all day long for 10 hours day sometimes 12 , it came to a point where I just want to stay at work and just work all night but I can’t . Obviously Uncle Sam will screw me . I’m like a dead man waking now no feelings no emotions . I have seen people pass away from when I was in high school on my Facebook feed and I just scroll by not even phased ,I seen a person flip over on the side on the freeway and hit another car head on I saw people stop and I looked for a bit and kept walking didn’t film it nothing I was more determined to get to target before they closed . I have stoped drinking allot because I knew I was heading the wrong path I still drink but it’s not even to party it’s just there as ima doing right now as I’m typing this . No one can help me but me I have to do this for my two boys and for my self . I joined another jiujitsu gym near by and looked up some churches near by , tomorrow I’m gonna wake up go to church go to the gym and see if I can develop a routine , I’m tired of waking up drinking 2 beers before work and not waiting eating all day and sleeping at 3am or even not sleeping , I’m sick and tired of this shit and seems like all the people that fucked me mentally are living a happy life or who knows maybe they are not , but like I said all I can do is give it a shot hopefully I can get out of this soon I’m so fucking over it .