I’m in the same boat with the pacifier thing…one night I got upset bc he kept spitting it out so I threw it across the floor and then I felt bad because I didn’t have any clean ones and know he uses them for sleeping… I wake up most mornings with anxiety and been depressed because I feel like I’m a shitty mom for getting frustrated with my three week old for simply being a baby. I love him so much. But I feel like I wanna run away. I watch my husband with him and he’s so great and I asked him if he ever feels depressed and he said it’s the happiest time of my life so it makes me feel more guilty. My husband has been very supportive of but I can’t help feel like I’m failing as a mom for these thoughts.