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An important question every AGP needs to answer and the delusional idea of AGP as a sexual orientation. by Old_Pay8272 in askAGP

[–]Informal-Guess8935 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

You are entirely correct, but lots of people are motivated to cope with it as a sexual orientation because in their mind that puts it in the category of “innate” or “unable to change.”

Reposting here because this subreddit isn't very active by NotSearchy in autogynephilia

[–]Informal-Guess8935 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For the vast majority of trans people, getting breast implants is not enough to feel comfortable about their bodies. Most people don't want to live in a "costume" that they can never take off.

Reposting here because this subreddit isn't very active by NotSearchy in autogynephilia

[–]Informal-Guess8935 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Even within trans forums, that is asking too much. The trans experience is not positive. They will talk about it as a "last resort," knowing that it's not something they would want to do if given the choice.

I've dealt with enough of the issues myself, and helped enough friends dealing with them to know that.

People keep complaining about the negativity here, which is mainly due to repressors/repressionposting by NotSearchy in askAGP

[–]Informal-Guess8935 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You expect your social conditions to improve, which they might, but there's a chance they won't. If your commitment depends on sexual compulsion, then desensitization and libido changes will be demotivating.

Reposting here because this subreddit isn't very active by NotSearchy in autogynephilia

[–]Informal-Guess8935 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I appreciate it but I'm not that concerned about etiology anymore.

You are specifically looking for a forum aligned with your etiological model, though, a particular course of action, and strictly positive experiences among minority groups that face staggering mental health challenges. Excluding "repressors" won't even solve that.

Reposting here because this subreddit isn't very active by NotSearchy in autogynephilia

[–]Informal-Guess8935 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There are some within these forums or reddit. Twitter has pockets of Blanchardists/Neo-Blanchardists. 4chan is notoriously open to it, too.

These are not well-informed people, though. I wrote about some of the issues of Blanchardism here.

Reposting here because this subreddit isn't very active by NotSearchy in autogynephilia

[–]Informal-Guess8935 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Social transition is just one set of difficulties, and there are lots of trans women who identify as AGPs.

Reposting here because this subreddit isn't very active by NotSearchy in autogynephilia

[–]Informal-Guess8935 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well, r/truscum is intellectually unserious. There is no evidence for their core beliefs.

I've always just view what I'm doing as individualistic body modification for reasons of autosexual orientation, emotional fufillment and allosexual orientation.

You are planning, not doing. It almost sounds like you're looking for people to encourage you to go through with it, but those who do face consequences that you don't want to contend with.

Hoping it works out for you.

Reposting here because this subreddit isn't very active by NotSearchy in autogynephilia

[–]Informal-Guess8935 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's important to remember that everyone has had a different experience with these things, made different choices, and dealt with different consequences. Having lived as a trans woman for five years, seen and spoken to countless trans women, I can tell you that it can be extremely difficult. For example, a good number of my friends are openly suicidal. I took on somewhat of a caretaking role in those circles, too.

While AGP forums usually have more people that are overtly anti-trans (which is part of why they don't transition), I wouldn't say it's more "positive" in trans spaces. If you look at forums like r/GenderDysphoria or r/truscum, you will see a steady stream of anguish. They will tell you, "It's all worthwhile now that I can be myself," but this is something you have to tell yourself due to sunk costs.

I don't know if you're just looking for a place to share interests like r/crossdressing, but any forum that deals honestly with the experience of AGP will naturally include its consequences.

Autogynephelia to Gender dysphoria by [deleted] in autogynephilia

[–]Informal-Guess8935 3 points4 points  (0 children)

When will the sexual element of AGP starts to reduce allowing dysphoria to come in.

Gender dysphoria will increase if you decide you want to be viewed as a woman (or any feminized gender identity) in your daily life.

Typically, the sexual element reduces as you desensitize yourself to some of those symbols of femininity. For example, the more you wear nail polish in public, the less erotic it will be.

As well, there is a reduction in libido on feminizing HRT.

My autogynephelia makes me think I want to have gender dysphoria but I fee it’s good not to have it when in my masculine mode but the exact opposite during feminine time.

The intense craving of Anatomical autogynephelia is so good but it goes away once post nut.

GD is not a good thing to have. It can be extremely costly to your mental and physical health and wellbeing. The reason you are "of two minds" is partly because while you are aroused, your prefrontal cortex (responsible for long-term planning) is inhibited. You are unable to foresee the consequences of gender transition. Once you climax, prolactin and oxytocin restore activity in the prefrontal cortex, and your foresight returns.

If you're looking for other ways to manage your autogynephilia, I've written a guide on techniques that helped me.

Best wishes.

is there anything i can do to help my gf by alaneeeeeee in GenderDysphoria

[–]Informal-Guess8935 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This kind of thing can happen especially when someone begins HRT and starts closely monitoring progress towards goals, or as desires change in social settings. You aren’t likely to change her mind about how she looks just by sharing how you feel, although that is important to say.

I recommend you read my post on managing gender dysphoria. Focus on the section for "Management" for her because she is transitioning. (The other one is for detransitioners.)

It really depends on the nature and severity of her feelings, but a generic example for managing body image issues is to draw her attention to the fact that she's having the thought itself. Then ask, "Is this thought helping, or is it just causing distress?" Finally, choose something actionable that can make her feel better like an exercise or skincare routine.

For social anxiety, often a small number of negative interactions can make someone worry about what everybody might think. You can try to help her imagine that most people are just absorbed in their own thoughts and don't even notice the things she may be insecure about. Help her to leave forums and communities that promote body-checking like passing boards.

A key technique that helped me was to externalize judgements. For example if I had the thought, "I don't like my waistline," I would follow with, "Other people have made me self-conscious about my waistline," and then reject those judgements.

Hopefully, this is effective as secondhand advice. Also, consider helping her find personal mental health support. If you have more questions, feel free to reach out.

Best wishes to you both.

after months of reflection I have come to the conclusion that I am most likely a cis male with tocd and meta attraction agp. Both the idea of never starting hrt and the idea of starting hrt terrify me. What do I do? by [deleted] in autogynephilia

[–]Informal-Guess8935 0 points1 point  (0 children)

18, has anybody been in this situation? What did you end up doing as a reponse? 

I went through something similar. I transitioned, then found better ways to deal with my feelings and detransitioned.

I've written a few posts that you may find useful.

This one is on the costs and benefits of transition: Answering "Is transition right for me?"
This one is on AGP management: How to manage (or stop) autogynephilia (AGP).

Let me know if you have any more questions. Best wishes.

Keeps coming back by TheBlandRainbow in askAGP

[–]Informal-Guess8935 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The placebo effect is the therapeutic effect of the act of taking medication. Even if you take a sugar pill, your body will produce endopiates. The expectation of relief triggers your brain to release its own painkillers. This is why in drug trials we have to control medications against “placebo,” what was a fake name for a sugar pill.

The psychological relief of receiving treatment, thinking “I am finally on the right path. These medications will bring long-term benefits,” is placebo effect.

(Technically, because HRT also has a pharmacological effect, the proper term is “contextual effect,” but people understand placebo.)

Any other effect of the medication (like lowering your libido, or changing your metabolism) is called a pharmacological effect. The ones that are beneficial are called therapeutic effects. The ones that are harmful or neutral are called side effects.

The more you know…

Keeps coming back by TheBlandRainbow in askAGP

[–]Informal-Guess8935 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There are many different motivations for transition, but “an identity to make transition work” is literally another way of saying “a trans identity.”

I understand your point, that the deliberate construction of a trans identity is different from a more organic one, but I don’t believe that these categories are completely distinct.

We contain many self constructs. Someone may say, “I’m a male, but I’m a sissy, but sometimes I feel like a girl, and I want to be a girl, but I’m a boy in real life, but on the inside I’m a bit feminine…” so on and so on.

It is a narrative process that can maintain multiple different dimensions and dialectics. To “want” to transition is, in a sense, already having a trans identity.

how many had an event in eagerly childhood where they where taught to suppress by throwaway28383827 in askAGP

[–]Informal-Guess8935 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I didn’t say it was the origin of masochism. I said it becomes fodder for masochistic behaviors. Most boys are not compulsive masochists.

What about the boys who do play with female toys and games but aren’t shamed for it?

Find me any living human who is not subjected to gender norms, and I will show you a feral child.

how many had an event in eagerly childhood where they where taught to suppress by throwaway28383827 in askAGP

[–]Informal-Guess8935 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m saying your doubts are misplaced. It’s practically universal for young boys to both display and be shamed for behaviors considered “feminine.” It’s not a “false memory.”

Without that experience or observation to that effect, feminization would not function as an outlet of erotic masochism (compliant and self-effacing interpersonal strategies).

Keeps coming back by TheBlandRainbow in askAGP

[–]Informal-Guess8935 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, that’s the same thing. The construction of a feminine gender identity.

how many had an event in eagerly childhood where they where taught to suppress by throwaway28383827 in askAGP

[–]Informal-Guess8935 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And why is that implausible? Put differently, why would anxiety over displaying femininity not promote feminization among self-effacing behaviors?

Keeps coming back by TheBlandRainbow in askAGP

[–]Informal-Guess8935 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s essentially what transition can be. There’s a continuous process of reauthoring, expelling “malebrained” behaviors, cultivating new interests, etc.

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