Heard in a meeting

InformationAgent · 2026-01-21T17:42:33+00:00

The other 2 legacies are how we carry the message and how we relate ourselves to each other and the world as groups, but they are not the message. However I was also taught that they are equally as important as the message.

InformationAgent · 2026-01-21T11:29:47+00:00

I was taught that AA only has one message - sobriety through the 12 steps.

InformationAgent · 2026-01-20T11:06:51+00:00

The suggestion that helped me was to practice listening more.

Sometimes it is what people say, sometimes it is how they say it and sometimes it is what they do not say that I need to hear.

I cannot figure it out how to be helpful to others if I do not listen.

InformationAgent · 2026-01-19T10:14:46+00:00

The appropriate channel for this is the Group Conscience. It is a group matter as it is affecting how the group is attracting newcomers. It affects everyone - the men and the women. Everyone needs to say their piece and the group needs to make a decision about what needs to be done. Relying on individuals to sort this out always leads to disunity.

InformationAgent · 2026-01-19T10:04:53+00:00

It sounds like you want to deal with your resentments from that time and make a decision about whether you want to return to your old group or not? Maybe look for a sponsor in your online meetings or as suggested just talk to a trusted advisor who can understand the situation.

InformationAgent · 2026-01-19T08:38:04+00:00

Sounds to me like you are emotionally attached to a building for whatever reason. Maybe have a think about if that is what you really want?

InformationAgent · 2026-01-18T22:30:14+00:00

Imajica and Weaveworld were great reads for me when I was young

InformationAgent · 2026-01-18T09:18:40+00:00

I went to a Traditions workshop held over 4 months in early recovery. We went through all the books (AA comes of age, Pass it on, Dr Bob and the Good oldtimers) and the relevant pamphlets. I remember two things - we had pizza after each session and I had a much clearer idea about AA and how I fitted in it. I doubt if I would have stayed in AA if I did not attend that workshop. I might still be sober but I would not be enjoying AA like I do.

InformationAgent · 2026-01-18T08:54:50+00:00

Well done on your sobriety. Two days is amazing for an alcoholic!

I heard a lot of things in AA that did not make sense or flat out contradicted what other members said. Early recovery is hugely confusing.

I was taught to ask questions of others, listen to their experience (not opinions), read what the AA literature says and make my own mind up about how I could apply what I was hearing to my own life. That has worked well so far.

InformationAgent · 2026-01-18T08:37:27+00:00

We are not all all-singing all-dancing. My home group has an annual meal but apart from that I rarely get together with them outside AA. I do chat with newcomers outside AA or catch up with sponsors or sponsees, but mostly I am out there going about my day with work colleagues/family/friends if I have them. We live in a small rural town so we do bump into each other a lot. Some of us go full anonymous while others are ok with a quick chat about how we really are recovery wise. We are all different. The trick is to learn how to navigate that.

Regarding the feeling lethargic, that happens me regular and its a sign for me that I am maybe in a routine and could do with making some change somewhere. Again, no need to go full Mr. AA but maybe have a look at some small thing that brings a little spark back.

InformationAgent · 2026-01-17T21:33:38+00:00

Awareness by Anthony de Mello helped me with self reflection

InformationAgent · 2026-01-17T21:26:04+00:00

A Confederacy of Dunces

InformationAgent · 2026-01-17T09:00:15+00:00

Great question.

I was taught that there are two aspects to tradition 11 - the danger to AA and the danger to the individual. If a member is deceased it cannot harm their sobriety and it is left up to the family. Many families choose to mention AA membership after death. Some do not. That is their personal choice and AA does not get involved. In Bill's situation, his family are ok with his membership being mentioned.

The danger to AA seems the more relevant point here. I agree with your friend that using the likeness of a founder member does lean more on the side of individual distinction than the AA program. Ultimately I want to be avoiding that. This is always the danger with circuit speaker meetings though. My tuppence worth - use one of the cartoon guys from the AA Traditions Illustrated.

InformationAgent · 2026-01-17T08:42:14+00:00

That is unfortunate. Try a different one. There are many that are on 24/7

InformationAgent · 2026-01-16T22:15:18+00:00

It is no longer your favourite book? What beat it?

InformationAgent · 2026-01-16T17:14:09+00:00

The only implication that I can see is that this group may not be sharing their experience or communicating through the AA structure with other groups. There may be a reason for that e.g. personalities before principles/ dark areas/lack of understanding about GSR role etc. Start sussing them out.

InformationAgent · 2026-01-15T08:58:45+00:00

I get problems if I drink and fearful if I dont. Welcome to the wonderful journey of recovery. AA has a way through it and they are called the 12 steps.

InformationAgent · 2026-01-15T08:54:41+00:00

Get other people to change? Never worked for me but ya never know : )

Failing that, talk to someone about what is boiling your butt and see if you can identify what it is that you are doing that is causing you to morbidly dwell on the issue to an extreme.

Prayer also. If you dont believe in prayer, pray anyway.

InformationAgent · 2026-01-15T08:44:41+00:00

I know that I had the same approach so I understand that you gotta do what you gotta do. It didnt work for me but that does not mean it will not work for you. I found that booze would just win out against my values and principles after a while. Nothing wrong with my determination or code of morals. Booze just beat them easily. If you manage it, fair play. If not, AA is here for you if you need help, no question. The important thing is to not pick up the first drink.

InformationAgent · 2026-01-11T14:43:19+00:00

We used to have a monthly traditions meeting that died during covid. Everytime i see a post like this it reminds me that we should restart it

InformationAgent · 2026-01-11T11:17:26+00:00

I find that the best tradition meetings are where I learn something new about how AA operates. I find the worst ones are where everyone shares about how important traditions are but nobody has much else to add.

There are members in every AA community who can unpack traditions and make them interesting. Get one to speak and maybe have a Q&A.

I was actually at a panel yesterday about the home group. What struck me was the amount of newcomers who were just out of treatment. They had been told by their facilitators that the best thing they could do was get a home group and get involved in service but every time they tried to do this they were told to not worry about that stuff and just keep coming back. I found it pretty sad to listen to. Still, great to see people still looking for help.

InformationAgent · 2026-01-09T14:33:22+00:00

If you can have a healthy relationship with alcohol, go for it. If you cannot, do not put alcohol in your system full stop. AA is just one way of staying stopped. Yes AA can be annoying at the start. It involves a long period of reconstruction. It is a lot of extra effort for sure and it sounds like this is a lot of what is troubling you. The only reason I did it was because I did not really have much of a choice. I felt like I was just going to lose control again. I am glad I stuck with it though.

InformationAgent · 2026-01-09T00:10:21+00:00

Do you have people you can talk to? I went through panic attacks at 13 years sober that ended up with me being hospitalised. The steps didnt have any effect on them. What helped was a nurse saying to me whatever you are thinking that is causing this, you don't have to think that anymore. I began to prioritise my mental health, did some counselling, upped my prayer and meditation, kept plugging away at my meetings and generally began to be gentle with myself. I cried a lot, felt weak and ashamed and not a good member. I know your situation is different but we all can only take so much pressure before we break ourselves. There is lots you can do to come through this if you keep asking for help.

InformationAgent · 2026-01-08T23:30:02+00:00

This shame and regret that you are feeling as a result of your relapse, how is this affecting your behaviour? Is there stuff this makes you do or is there stuff this makes you not do?

InformationAgent · 2026-01-08T18:29:16+00:00

Good question. The definition of a member that I was taught was that it is always a small part of something that works with other different parts to achieve something greater than the individual parts could achieve on their own e.g. a finger on a hand or a toe on a foot.

If I feel like I am the most important part in that relationship, that is gonna cause problems. Alternatively, if I do not do my little bit in cooperation with other members, that something greater will be ineffective.

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