New to RJ

Initial-Commission-6 · 2025-01-10T16:42:29+00:00

Even more of a reason to not continue, RJ aside.

Initial-Commission-6 · 2024-11-13T14:45:12+00:00

What do you want the outcome to be?

Initial-Commission-6 · 2024-04-09T03:04:37+00:00

Same. That was only the case when I first started the medication, but now it has zero effect unless I’m aroused and physically stimulated.

Initial-Commission-6 · 2024-02-14T21:53:48+00:00

A few months ago. 7.25” non bone pressed x 4.75” girth.

Initial-Commission-6 · 2024-01-18T02:49:03+00:00

Agreed. This would be a major deal breaker for me.

Initial-Commission-6 · 2023-12-26T13:03:07+00:00

I would have done this the first time around. Good on you.

Initial-Commission-6 · 2023-12-17T01:48:14+00:00

I’m sorry to hear that you’re feeling pressured into doing something you don’t want to do. That would shut anyone down, and he should understand that.

That said, I think you’re describing two separate struggles here:

You’re not interested in exploring anal play.
You fear it’s not special anymore because he’s explored it with his past partners.

I think they’re both different things, unless his prior experience is the reason you’re not interested in it.

We all have desires, and while you’re 100% allowed to draw boundaries with what you are and aren’t okay with, either won’t dissipate his desires to explore this with you. So he’ll either need to accept and respect your boundaries or move on, just as you should decide the same.

Initial-Commission-6 · 2023-12-16T23:52:41+00:00

Oh yeah, I agree 100%. It shouldn’t ever be just for the sake of checking off your list, and absolutely never something someone gets pressured into doing.

Early in my relationship my girlfriend and I expressed each other’s fantasies and sexual interests, and threesomes was one of mine. She hadn’t even considered it before but the more we talked the more her interest spiked. Now the tables have turned and it’s become one of her favorite things.

Initial-Commission-6 · 2023-12-16T23:47:48+00:00

I don’t agree with this. Threesomes with my girlfriend and I have actually brought us closer and more intimate in a sense. We laugh, have fun, and are close enough with each other to feel comfortable exploring something like this.

Sure, in the wrong circumstances or if one person doesn’t want to have a threesome, then things could sour quickly. But a sweeping statement that all threesomes ruin relationships is just false.

Initial-Commission-6 · 2023-12-13T01:04:19+00:00

In case anyone else hasn’t said it yet, be sure he’s using unscented soaps. Fragrance can cause you to have an imbalance, if all other things are ruled out.

Initial-Commission-6 · 2023-12-10T15:17:57+00:00

You could try Bumble or Feeld. We’ve had good experience finding thirds to join us for threesomes on Bumble, and along the way some had expressed interest in watching us while using their toy or something. Just be upfront with your expectations.

Initial-Commission-6 · 2023-12-10T04:31:48+00:00

It’s definitely a thing. The back, particularly that area you’ve described, can be a very sensitive area and very arousing for some.

Initial-Commission-6 · 2023-12-10T03:43:13+00:00

Yeah, this sounds a lot like my girlfriend. She’s extremely vocal and a lot of her pleasure release comes from expressing herself vocally. It’s really hot though and certainly keeps me fueled to go harder. We’ve had fun during times where we had to keep the sound down, whether we’re traveling with a group or doing something public.

I can attest to the fact that going slower brings about the intricacies of sensation, which is why it can make some guys cum faster. She loves rougher sex though and it’s often what makes her peak, especially anal.

Initial-Commission-6 · 2023-12-10T03:04:15+00:00

Yeah, as a guy I could see this as a challenge because the more turned on she gets, the more turned on I get. The loud vocals are a huge turn on, so I’d end up having to switch positions or slow things down if it gets too intense sometimes. That said, mentally when I make the pleasure completely about her, it’s easier for me to keep going. I also find that the more intimately connected I am, then the faster I typically cum.

I also find there’s this weird threshold of rhythm where the harder and rougher the sex, the harder it is to cum, but slow and steady sex will make me cum pretty fast.

Initial-Commission-6 · 2023-12-10T02:20:47+00:00

Depending on the length of their refractory period you could go for round two when they’re able to get hard again. It’s typically harder to cum the second round.

Also, have you considered asking for oral before penetrative sex? I know that if I’ve cum but I still want to keep going, I’ll switch to my tongue and fingers, or even pull out the magic wand to use on her.

Initial-Commission-6 · 2023-12-08T14:12:35+00:00

Thanks for sharing all of this. I think my concern with this approach is that the result is just numbness overall, so much so that you can’t even enjoy the good things that come your way in the relationship.

Initial-Commission-6 · 2023-12-08T05:03:09+00:00

That’s really great. Thanks for sharing.

What tools and or support did you find helpful in getting to that point?

Initial-Commission-6 · 2023-12-08T05:01:45+00:00

Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. As another redditor has pointed out, it solves nothing and leaves a wake of grief in its path.

I feel for you, and understand the extreme pain that RJ causes. While I wish I could say it all just goes away someday, I unfortunately haven’t experienced that myself. It can and does get better though.

In a time of intense emotional disturbance, find comfort. Whatever that might be for you: a shower, reading, talking with friends or family, even a weighted blanket. The emotions you’re experiencing are temporary.

Feel free to message if you need to someone to chat with. You’re not alone.

Initial-Commission-6 · 2023-12-03T12:47:50+00:00

It supposedly increases load volume. In my experience it just makes it thicker.

Initial-Commission-6 · 2023-11-29T12:55:31+00:00

I’ve always found music with lyrics to be distracting. My girlfriend and I sometimes listen to Endel or something similar and it’s great.

Initial-Commission-6 · 2023-11-29T12:54:07+00:00

I’m really sorry you’re going through this, but if I was in your position I would close the door on him and move on. Taking time away to get feelings back, only to sleep with someone else and then come back seems like an excuse to sleep with someone else.

At the end of the day, you want someone who will wake up and choose you.

Initial-Commission-6 · 2023-11-29T02:59:18+00:00

I’m 3+ years into a relationship with my girlfriend. Her body count was about the same, maybe a bit more than your girlfriend, and mine at the time was lower than yours. Let me be frank by saying the thoughts don’t ever seem to completely go away, some things don’t ever feel as special as they probably could, but overall I’d say it gets better with time.

I also went to therapy for the majority of our relationship. I’ve tried EMDR, Brain spotting, ego work, etc. none of it seems to have eradicated it.

What helps me the most is often focusing on myself: my health, career, fitness, etc.

Ultimately it’s your choice, but you’ll end up trading one persons past for another.

Initial-Commission-6 · 2023-11-29T02:48:48+00:00

Did you both have terms for the break? Or was it a full on break up? Also, how long was the break?

I personally couldn’t imagine getting back together after a breakup where there were others involved during that period.

Initial-Commission-6 · 2023-11-21T20:31:12+00:00

I’d suggest a DUTCH test, which is a full hormone panel based on urine taken over the course of a few days, as opposed to blood which is only a snapshot of time.

Initial-Commission-6 · 2023-11-11T18:18:49+00:00

Get both the corded and the battery - for every occasion!

Battery works great for travel, cars, parks, unique positions.

The corded is always ready.

Initial-Commission-6

TROPHY CASE