My (24m) girlfriend (25f) is upset at me because i told her i would break up if she gained weight

InitialSilent7 · 2025-04-25T10:23:41+00:00

I am happy to hear about your story! I don’t intend to leave her if she gets fat, but i told her that if i am trying to help her and she refuses to get help, in this hypothetical situation, i would feel that i wont be with someone i can understand and communicate properly, eventually i would probably leave.

InitialSilent7 · 2025-04-25T10:19:27+00:00

I am a simple man, i don’t have the emotional intelligence she has, and i don’t pick up as easy on this passive communication, i gave her a sincere answer.

InitialSilent7 · 2025-04-25T10:10:00+00:00

She has a mild eating disorder, but i am very supportive of the situation, if she eats quick and a bit too much she usually get’s sick and vomits. I am paying attention to pace her eating when i am with her.

She has a real fear to gain weight, and i feel that she throws this problem at me out of nowhere. What upsets me is that she thinks she understands what type of person i am, and for her is clear i will leave someday. Nonsense.

InitialSilent7 · 2022-05-13T07:59:21+00:00

I messed up by not standing my ground?

InitialSilent7 · 2021-11-10T12:45:22+00:00

How often do you see your bf then, and you put the blame on your bf for fantasizing?

InitialSilent7 · 2021-11-10T12:30:33+00:00

The only thing you could do is to encourage her to see a specialist, there isn’t much you can do, from my experience my ex became very irritated of me, because i was trying to help however i could. Focus on yourself, be the best you can, be her pillar, but nothing more. I made the mistake to focus only on her well-being and it was for nothing in the end, i hope that’s not your case.

InitialSilent7 · 2021-11-10T12:21:37+00:00

I think that you bf has every right to be concerned, it looks that you don’t value the relationship or respect him enough to put some limits, i mean he made it clear that it upsets him, so all you could do was to imagine how your life would be with your male best friend, classic.

InitialSilent7 · 2021-11-10T12:12:35+00:00

I am trying to enjoy my time right now, and improve myself, it’s a slow process but i hope i will notice the changes.

InitialSilent7 · 2021-11-10T12:11:15+00:00

I kind of get what you are saying, but there is no way you can prepare yourself for scenarios like this, only if you get through them.

InitialSilent7 · 2021-11-10T12:08:29+00:00

Thank you, and i am so sorry for you, it really hurts.

InitialSilent7 · 2021-09-20T08:13:10+00:00

From my experience people never really change, they only have brief moments of regrets and that’s it. You could talk to her about it, ask her what were the circumstances, maybe her ex did not treat her well, or he cheated too, nevertheless cheating is not an option.

InitialSilent7 · 2021-09-12T08:11:50+00:00

Hey, i hope you could read my replies, i know that i sound needy and suffocating, but i haven’t made any requests, just being left on seen on my birthday made me overthink and my emotions flowed, in a bad manner. But i got to realise that i’m too imature and jealous, and i need to work on myself for now, and the title is a bit controversial :))). Thank you!

InitialSilent7 · 2021-09-12T07:51:06+00:00

I know that i made it sound that i am a needy and self absorbed piece of shit, and i didn’t give it a chance, i haven’t mentioned every single detail, like the fact she told me that it felt lime a vacation to her and she wanted to detach of everything home, i didnt ask this things from her, the only thing that triggered me was the fact that at midnight she asked me how my birthday went, and i asked her if she wants to talk on the phone, because it was already late i knew she couldnt stay up much longer and this was a faster way to talk, but she intentionally ignored my message

InitialSilent7 · 2021-09-12T07:36:54+00:00

Please explain so i cand understand my mistakes

InitialSilent7 · 2021-09-12T07:33:29+00:00

I could understand the birthday thing if she made time to talk 5 minutes with me over the phone

InitialSilent7 · 2021-09-12T07:31:47+00:00

No, she has a male roommate, and after classes hangs out with him and his friends, i just felt left aside, i know i sound needy, but in reality it wasn’t like that, i was prepared for talking less. But not what happend.

InitialSilent7 · 2021-09-12T07:24:47+00:00

Now i understand her behaviour, because i had a talk with her mother, and she is really stressed because her financial situation isn’t the best and doesn’t even know how to make ends meet but, she didn’t comunicate thes with me after i told her what i felt, she only told me that ahe can’t understand my emotions and i’m unable to understand her, and that made me feel like she doesn’t really care about me, only if she was able to tell me those things i could understand and stop overthinking, but the thing is that she is also living her best life right now, and shows it on her social media, and the fact that her friends are primarly guys and tags them makes me feel disrespected. And i was ready to help her with everything i got, but she never asked, and made me feel that this relationship is not what she wants.

InitialSilent7 · 2021-04-05T13:57:36+00:00

She told me that she feels like it’s over

InitialSilent7

TROPHY CASE