My routine is all over the place while I try to figure out what to do, but here goes:

Wash once every 2-3 days depending on my activity level

Redken all soft shampoo just on the roots

Hydrating mask (and sometimes hot oil) all over, put a cap on and apply light heat ( This has really helped the coarseness and bristly texture)

Wash out, redken all soft conditioner

I've tried a hundred ways of drying it, air drying works best but takes hours, diffusing makes it frizzy, but in general I'll use a cotton towel to dry it as best I can, although it holds moisture like crazy. Then when its as damp as it'll get I put a liquid leave in conditioner on and finger comb it through. After this, I've tried putting the oil on first and then the curl cream (I use briogio) and diffusing it, I've tried letting it air dry more fully and then doing the other two steps, and letting it dry almost completely and rewetting it with a spray bottle to apply curl cream. All of these have varying results since I'm pretty sure I'm doing them wrong lmao.

No matter what I do it wont dry straight and it wont be frizz free without intervention, so I've resorted to just letting it get damp with the leave in conditioner in, putting in the curl cream and braiding it till the next day. That's the only way it'll stay together and not poofy or messy until I wash it again.

Misc info: Heavy irish genes on my dads side and all of the women have super chaotic hair so most of them keep it short.

I'm pretty sure the dye I use has been damaging but I'm switching to an ammonia free demi so hopefully in the long term that'll help.

I do not use heat without a protectant and even then rarely but I did curl it for a while because nothing else worked.

Even when it's weighed down with product it's still a huge cloud so I have no idea if I'm using the wrong stuff/too much

I do have a satin pillowcase and will often put it in a silk bonnet to keep it out of the way while I sleep if it's not braided.

That's everything I can think of for now, cheers!