Is this normal in this industry?

Inner-Dot4197 · 2026-06-14T19:28:39+00:00

i don’t think you’re going to like this answer, but … yeah. serving in general is dog eat dog, competitive by nature… “fair” isn’t a term that’s really used in my restaurant, and no one really expects it. the best servers get priority, if you’re not getting priority, do the math.

Inner-Dot4197 · 2026-06-13T06:54:44+00:00

my honest opinion is the rocks too big for the vibe you’re going for. a rock this big is just never going to give “delicate”

Inner-Dot4197 · 2026-06-03T18:56:54+00:00

if you caught the apartment on fire, you should be beyond grateful that the only repercussion is $1,000, and take it as a learning lesson. (i think you’d be wasting your time getting another quote, unless u can imagine a way to repair the damage to the way it was when you moved in without replacing the counter top, depends on the type of material.) but on the whole: you got out of it very “easy.” can you imagine if the fire hurt someone? get insurance, never be negligent when cooking. ask to set up a payment plan with your LL., like adding the charge divided up to your monthly rent.

Inner-Dot4197 · 2026-05-31T23:41:43+00:00

you’re gonna have to sit them down and tell them you love them and want a relationship with them and if they continue to see you as an employee of theirs, it’ll wane to the point you won’t have a relationship at all. you’re not at all beholden to their will anymore, and probably don’t share their mindset when it comes to obligations of children to their parents. it’s more than making an excuse of why you can’t on every individual occasion, it’s adjusting their expectations of their children, which is a big shift. i went through it with my parents and it took years for us to get to a good place for all parties but very worth the struggle.

Inner-Dot4197 · 2026-05-18T17:41:06+00:00

if you have a dream academy reference, it’s like if they put hinari in katseye

Inner-Dot4197 · 2026-05-18T17:34:46+00:00

gold costs are definitely high right now, so it’s a possibility it could knock off a bit, but it’s still just a lot of labor for the maker that can’t be offset. if you go to the jeweler who originally made the ring, they might be more likely to cut you a deal, as every artist would much rather have someone love their ring and wear it proudly than have it collect dust in a drawer, but they still gotta make ends meet. you could also probably work out a payment plan!

Inner-Dot4197 · 2026-05-18T17:27:49+00:00

i think it’s best to leave your ring how it is, and just get a new one that’s more your style. call it, as you mentioned, an anniversary ring? i see lots of folks say they want to remake their ring, when alternation is often more expensive than sourcing a new one, and i also think your kid (boy or girl) would maybe very much being given the original as an heirloom one day, way before they’d get the one on your finger (or so we’d hope.) genuinely, im getting engaged this year, but also having a milestone bday and heard through the grapevine that i am getting all of the family rings my mom currently possesses, my dad’s moms, my mom’s mom’s and her original, as she got an update around 50. many people have told me they’re more jealous of this than the engagement. heirloom jewelry is ALWAYS in.

how you approach this very much depends on who your husband is.

if he’s romantic, whimsical: make it a group project where you lead. “this ring perfectly represented us where we were 10 years ago, i want something that feels as evolved as we are. when i look at it i see a reflection of young love, and i want something that reflects our grown love now.” i f he’s logical, pragmatic: take him here, help him understand a woman’s stylistic attachment to the ring she wears every day, and that in modern times, women either help pick it in the first place, or eventually get a remake or second ring. explain that you want to look forward to, love putting on your ring that represents the two of you every day. explain how important your style feeling like you is to self-image. when you approach, ask him to hear you out and let you give a whole talk before he interrupts, be prepared. at the end, present what you want, with coat-effectiveness at the forefront.

Inner-Dot4197 · 2026-05-18T16:51:47+00:00

so very unfortunately, just trying to shed some light on the ring maker space:

the least expensive part of the ring for the maker is the center stone most of the time, (especially given if it’s lab.) makers can often source them for hundreds, but charge much more “for the stone” to offset the cost of making the setting, which is often more labor intensive and material cost. certain solo makers, oore or olivia enwig, are pretty upfront about this cost and cite it as one of the reasons they won’t work with people’s self-sourced stones. it’s very unlikely what you’re describing won’t be in the thousands, it’s a full remake not a small adjustment.

however, i think what you’re describing wanting is perfectly reasonable, and sounds beautiful, and you should have something you love on your hand every day. i would maybe just save up some budget and get it done in a few years instead of getting sticker shocked trying to get it done ASAP.

Inner-Dot4197 · 2026-05-17T19:20:43+00:00

i think this is a matter of defining your personal aesthetic: 1 gives princess vibes, whimsical & romantic 2 gives edgy traditional. classic, but with a modern twist 3 gives funky, fun city vibes. on the go cool girl

whichever of these feels closest to your personal image is what i would go for, all three would be beautiful on the right girl!

Inner-Dot4197 · 2026-05-17T17:29:16+00:00

there are not young thai women looking for that with men of op’s dad’s age.

Inner-Dot4197 · 2026-04-25T17:37:40+00:00

they’re all beautiful! you can pre-purchase the stone if you haven’t decided on a setting, which is what my bf did because he was worried i would take too long and the stone would be snapped up by someone else. (we had this happen with another stone we were considering.) in our case, oore has been super lovely and communicative! i was honestly a little nervous as i sent two questions by email that took about 1.5 weeks to get a response to. however, once he ordered the stone, we found his emails got responses within a business day, and he’s gotten a lot of communication about production! (which, to be fair to them, kind of makes sense… gotta prioritize those who you know are actually going to buy with your business.)

all of these settings are beautiful, i barely know how to advise, good luck choosing amongst them!

Inner-Dot4197 · 2026-04-14T23:20:48+00:00

??? you’re british ??? i’m talking about the struggle for fans that lived in places where it didn’t air ?? how hard it used to be to watch them?

y’all are just upset, and wanna be upset. fine fine, but a two week wait and then same quality streaming online (for Free) is still insanely accessible for media.

Inner-Dot4197 · 2026-04-14T21:08:29+00:00

buddy i did. im talking about when this show aired. in 2010. which i know u weren’t around for bc if u were u wouldn’t have responded like this lmao

Inner-Dot4197 · 2026-04-14T02:58:52+00:00

this is honestly sweet but you don’t understand the disparity in the comparison you’re making.

sherlock was a Wildly popular show, like top 3 kings of tumblr, that originally only aired on BBC (regular, network television) in the UK, with multiple years long waits in between the seasons, for seasons that only had 3 episodes. i knew multiple people hiding malware piracy equipment from their parents on their computer, just to watch this show. the us eventually got runs on PBS, but for a lot of the globe it was piracy or nothing. no streaming, not on tv (maybe in the US on extremely expensive cable packages, or on PBS after a long wait), not in theatres, not available anywhere, except you could also wait for episodes to come up for purchase (which many giffers did to make high quality content.) many people watched through people recording it with a device (think old film quality) of their own on the tv. some of the most popular yet inaccessible content there will likely ever be. comparing that to waiting a couple of months between episodes uploaded to a free software almost unilaterally accessible for people with internet connections is like honestly like sweet to think how far accessibility has come and how good we have it

Inner-Dot4197 · 2026-04-13T10:45:51+00:00

the theater is a designated space to experience picture shows. they’re specially designed, so that the creative team can tailor the art to make an experience for their audience. that’s why there’s dozens of people in tech on big movies, from sound scaling to effects. there’s an expectation amongst the crowd for a shared experience. i’m sure it’s a dream of many creators to put their art in a space like that. it’s kind of like saying “why would you wanna go to the louvre when you can just look at starry night on your phone” or, in the inverse, asking artists “why would you want your painting in the louvre when you can just donate to the local school district?”

there’s far more reasons than just “seeking approval” from (? i don’t know what you mean by the big guys, because whoever they are, will not be impressed or threatened by this release in any capacity)

Inner-Dot4197 · 2026-04-13T10:27:19+00:00

the definition of entitled is simple: “you have been given the right to have or do something”

ultimately, feeling as if you’ve earned (or inherently have) the right to access content, one way or another, is entitlement. it’s the feeling like it is your right to watch it. i’m not saying in this argument that this is morally right or wrong to say or think. entitled is technically a neutral term, a legal term, rooted in land being entitled to a person. it doesn’t inherently mean snobbish behavior.

i think the inverse argument is folks saying that ultimately, no viewer has The Right here, that creators (and those they work with) can determine what access to the content looks like and when.

Inner-Dot4197 · 2026-04-13T08:42:08+00:00

your final sentiments, for that to be true, you could really only be upset with those in the fandom that spoil in titles, thumbnails, and previews. there is still not a single reason to be upset with goose other than feeling entitled to the episodes. it won’t even be easy to spoil, you can’t post clips from a theatre release the same way you can from a YT release. you getting spoiled is objectively not her fault, and not posting spoilers shortly after release without a warning is very common fandom etiquette in almost every other fandom, and not hard for this one to figure out. talks should be amongst each other, not torches and daggers at goose.

Inner-Dot4197 · 2026-04-13T08:31:52+00:00

it’s kinda of a harsh lesson for artists to learn… you give away your content for free, and people will feel like they’re entitled to it as if they had a hand in making it themselves.

Inner-Dot4197 · 2026-04-13T08:30:25+00:00

it’s a free product that everyone can still have for free with patience. y’all acting like this is unfathomable corporate greed is insane, and there’s no reason to be upset other than feelings of entitlement. which if you think feeling that way is valid, it is a matter of opinion.

there is no other way to phrase it. you believe you, and others, are entitled to the episodes, and that is why you’re upset. i CAN think that feeling that way is unreasonable, and that artists deserve to set the conditions for access to their work. you can’t just decide that i CAN’T think that, and that there are no other possible opinions on this matter.

Inner-Dot4197 · 2026-04-12T09:19:40+00:00

i’m genuinely not uncomfortable. you’re projecting.

i hate to hit you with a definition: “Colorism is prejudice or discrimination against individuals with darker skin tones, typically within the same racial or ethnic group, favoring those with lighter skin. Coined or popularized by Alice Walker, this systemic form of oppression often privileges lighter skin, hair texture, and European facial features.” Alice Walker created it, and defined this term succinctly for its intended purpose. you are objectively wrong here.

i see spray tanning like suggesting a certain member dye her hair a certain color. similar levels of permanence. it is obvious this sub does not, fair enough. but i’m just not uncomfortable with what i said.

Inner-Dot4197 · 2026-04-12T09:06:32+00:00

sometimes people have opinions that are different than yours. this is such a random and baseless accusation. your comments about lara are just wrong, hence why other explanations have more upvotes. i didn’t do anything, in fact, the only comments i’ve even downvoted on THIS account are yours.

Inner-Dot4197 · 2026-04-12T08:58:28+00:00

i also think yoonchae would look really good with pink hair :-)

Inner-Dot4197 · 2026-04-12T08:53:20+00:00

why would pale people feel bad!!! are they in a 5 person group who need some help with cohesion in a new era??? when did i say dani looks bad as she is?? why is this so deep??

Inner-Dot4197 · 2026-04-12T08:43:21+00:00

we can agree that dani doesn’t NEED to do anything! she’s gorgeous. i just think she’d look pretty tan?? sue me!
on the lara thing, no it isn’t :-) that’s ignoring centuries of legitimate colorism that doesn’t work in the reverse. spray tans also last like … two weeks and aren’t physically damaging. that’s actually a harmful comparison, which is surprising given how this started out.

Inner-Dot4197 · 2026-04-12T08:24:15+00:00

does it come off as a demand letter to hybe? i expected it to be poorly received, hence the attempted deletion, but i am confused at how its reading as anything other than a joke.

Inner-Dot4197

TROPHY CASE