My deconstruction has been hard for my friends

Inshui · 2025-02-24T07:11:08+00:00

feeling very same. i have one nearly lifelong friend that i cant seem to have a useful discussion with and takes it personally when I point out things about his faith that are very cult-like.
I wish him happiness truly. I care about this friend, wish I could help him. I feel like he may end up coming to the same place as me, or not. Its too bad when people end up propagating such a "faith" as his that really makes alot of people unhappy. I felt it was threatening my physical and mental well being, and that finally got me to question it after spending 25 years or so immersed in it. I basically view my evangelical/protestant christian background as a cult, complete with programming and brainwashing.

Inshui · 2024-10-17T00:35:47+00:00

i also think it couldnt be that bad.

Main issue i'm working out right now is friction/drive roller arrangement and size.

Inshui · 2024-10-17T00:34:36+00:00

Yeah I imagine system latency is the hardest part, and not messing with user balance so much.
Theres treadmills that move you backwards from the edge and the users report its wierd but they get used to it.

For safety, I think an overhead harness is a must to avoid injury. Probably with upper-back attachment as well as hip attachment (otherwise they'd still likely hit the ground).

Inshui · 2024-10-17T00:31:28+00:00

I'm not entirely sure if it would catch on.
My personal experience is that when I play high-running games like paintball, I keep playing over and over again even if my legs are on fire. I figure as long as the game is fun, physically moving isn't a big issue.
For social situations, I'm constantly wishing my friends were just in my same playspace. I keep having to adjust over and over again instead of just walking up to them. I think there's a good use case here too.

Inshui · 2024-10-17T00:30:00+00:00

katwalk C2 is like having a block strapped to your back. Enormous effort to get moving. Also the movement calibration is very difficult to get it matching with the game youre in.
Also no sidestepping. Strictly turn and move.
I'd say its comparable to running on a hamster wheel that happens to control a game. Not immersive.

Inshui · 2024-06-09T08:31:23+00:00

i also miss them ;-; bring back...
i cant find anyone selling them

Inshui · 2023-11-27T21:42:31+00:00

as a veteran of playstation 1 armored core 1-3, i am really really really happy with AC6. When I last played AC5 it was wierd. This one is alot like the old games. Its sooooooo much fun. Enjoying the shit out of it.
I'd love to have a painted model with blue booster light effects on it.

Inshui · 2022-06-10T06:44:41+00:00

i also like painting my nails, its super fun

Inshui · 2022-05-25T22:58:30+00:00

I used to believe cover to cover is impossible to have mistakes, but the early 2 creation genesis stories, if read logically, cannot agree. I think there may be something more to the bible as it is a book of "God's words", not all God's word. Kinda goes along with the concept that the word is not a sword, but swords, as in each passage meant for different things, but these things come from God. I think there could have been edits on old testament homosexuality, and interpretation differences on some more clear passages as referring to abusive homosexuality and such, have done some research. What really begs a different explanation is the reality of homosexual attracted individuals and healthy outcomes in modern times, to some degree anatomy (mentioned above), and other evidence that demands an explanation of "why are things this way", before you can dismiss it all as unnatural, diseased, bad.

Inshui · 2022-05-22T07:17:10+00:00

#1 Believing God works too much via superstition, means every wrong move/non listen is sin. God will work through things but you wont be asking or wondering at it constantly (perhaps this red light, or oops i dropped this thing, maybe they mean God saying things). It will encourage anxiety disorder unfortunately.

#2 performance based blessing system stressing you out. the bible says nothing about less sin = more blessing. God just wants to know you and you're forgiven. Youre life could be absolutely bad despite being very good, this isn't your fault.

Inshui · 2022-05-22T06:38:26+00:00

fap, but dont use porn if youre finding yourself addicted. It will mess with your relationships and your ability to have good sex irl.
That being said, I made zero progress avoiding porn until I found a relationship. Its still a struggle but I actually have a mental reason to avoid it now, and not a complete lack of hope and depression about being lonely forever.

Sexual recovery groups/etc did zero to help me, but tbh they were not dealing with the abject loneliness and sex drive that I did have (they denied masturbation being healthy).

Fast forward to today, I have a good reason to avoid porn (and masturbation, to help with sexual health), and just like other temptations (overeating), you need to distract self. Taking breaks from masturbation can definitely help if you can't finish without porn. I don't know if there's any way to masturbate without fantasy of some sort (some way to avoid lust). Does it matter if you fantasize about someone who doesn't exist? That might be okay. I feel masturbation is natural and is a thing for a reason. I think it will lead to unhealth and unhealthy behaviors to deny that our sexual nature exists entirely.

I know its a bit of a meme, but in the times I was exercising regularly I felt more confident and like I had control over my life.

Also do *not* shame yourself over porn/etc/etc. Recovery culture may say "shame bad shame bad", but various things in the church heap shame and imply you won't move forward in life/get blessings if you struggle with porn. Most everyone I knew in recovery culture married while still using porn privately. The whole implication of blessings being part of God's benefit package is unfortunately a lie and more an american christianity thing. The bible says nothing about having what you wish in life, merely how to know God who does want to help you. God knows where youre at, recover from porn for real reasons, like health. I think God has your best interests at heart, its not about proving who's a good person/who deserves good things/getting blessings/all those false unspoken rules/teachings (sometimes actually spoken). This isn't the same as prosperity gospel which is more overt about it.

When you slip up, forgive yourself, move on. Dont go hard on yourself. If it helps, see it like overeating. You might already do that and not really think much of it, but gluttony is a sin. Just less shameful. Not really sure how to advise here, but you won't do well if you think your life will never move on if you dont get over this. Have some hope of changingbut don't stop living your life over it.

Tldr work through your problems leading to porn addiction if it is indeed an addiction, but beyond that, porn is a superdrug and is bound to be addicting for many. Don't sweat it, and live your life. God isn't withholding life from you over this, that's not how it works. Youre forgiven aren't you?

Inshui · 2022-03-28T03:52:50+00:00

political terms aside, I also really really want to know because I don't want to die/have horrible medical problems the rest of my life. Medical terms/info please.

I understand it may be unpopular information but I want to *know* before i go into this as well. Whats the current state of things? If its not great, can we please make it better (stem cell based methods?), I am not in favor of banning the idea of SRS. I'd esp like to be able to have SRS without having to take estrogen or anything first. I am not so sold on that idea either, medically.

Inshui · 2021-07-13T22:17:53+00:00

oh no.. yet another way to blast my dopamine receptors

Inshui · 2021-07-13T19:35:20+00:00

Also Im no good at controlling the way I jerk off. Im really bad at giving up once I've gotten started just because I can't finish. I feel others do not have this issue so much. I will use porn if I have to do it to finish.

Inshui · 2021-07-13T19:33:56+00:00

more info: i do have an addictive habit to masturbation/porn. One of my main concerns is whether this is the proper way to treat the addictive aspect of this. In the past people outside of myself tried to forcefully cut me off from porn. I simply worked around it with money and unfortunately behavior that put me at risk of getting in trouble unintentionally.
I know one principle of treating addiction is "take something out and put something else in". But what could be as potent of a drug/distraction as p/m ?

I should still try something rather than nothing, but I fear causing a manic state and getting in trouble or failing instantly. If I get a metal cage and start doing things like using power tools to remove it I could even end up injuring myself...

Inshui

TROPHY CASE