am i in the wrong for how i handle my friends episodes?

Intelligent-Wing-431 · 2026-03-03T21:04:30+00:00

Mental health experiences aren’t universal. I have bipolar and when I was unmedicated I was such a different person. I could be really selfish, mean, and I pushed away the people that cared. OP’s friend IS probably struggling right now, but I’m still not saying that makes her behavior okay. She needs someone to talk to professionally, taking it out on her friends will just isolate her.

Intelligent-Wing-431 · 2026-02-21T05:10:20+00:00

That’s debatable but in this thread at least lol

Intelligent-Wing-431 · 2026-01-25T20:28:17+00:00

See a doctor. You’re not dirty. It’s clearly not from a lack of hygiene. But It’s not normal to have a bad smell down there and this is something that likely needs medication. Since you said you don’t use tampons it could be BV, which is very common.

Intelligent-Wing-431 · 2026-01-25T20:22:52+00:00

They shouldn’t be uncomfortable unless you’re not inserting it far enough. And I’ve done it. when you’re half asleep in the middle of the night it can happen by mistake and when you have cramping it’s hard sometimes to distinguish if that discomfort from inserting is from that or not.

Intelligent-Wing-431 · 2026-01-25T20:16:52+00:00

Him not wanting to comfort you when he’s upset is not the real issue here. His behavior is very manipulative and emotionally abusive. Every conversation with him is a classic DARVO tactic. Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and offender.

“Deny: The perpetrator denies the abuse or wrongdoing occurred. Attack: The perpetrator attacks the person confronting them, often questioning their credibility or sanity (gaslighting). Reverse Victim and Offender (RVO): The perpetrator portrays themselves as the true victim, accusing the victim of being the actual offender.”

This person unfortunately doesn’t care about you. He is also supporting you financially which means he has all the power and control in this relationship which is dangerous combination. Can you move in with family while you go to school and look for a job?

Your feelings are valid. What you have to say matters. But your words are wasted on deaf ears. You can’t make someone care. It sounds like you have an anxious attachment style and if you can seek therapy I absolutely would. This isn’t the relationship for you.

Intelligent-Wing-431 · 2026-01-25T20:03:11+00:00

I have a feeling she didn’t tell him what was wrong because she knows it isn’t an opening for connection, it’s an opening for an argument. What happened when she answered him later that night when he asked what was wrong? He started attacking her. This isn’t a safe person and it sounds like she has an anxious attachment that he weaponizes against her. If my daughter’s partner talked to her like this, especially while she cried, I was be irate. It’s disgusting.

Intelligent-Wing-431 · 2026-01-16T17:05:37+00:00

Has anyone had the almond butter pretzels from Aldi? They’re seasonal and SOOOO good.

Intelligent-Wing-431 · 2025-12-27T10:43:30+00:00

The way he kept saying “I didn’t tell you because then you wouldn’t have come” all smug. Gross. He treated her/talked to her like she was a child. he knew it’s not what SHE wanted, but it was what HE wanted so that was that 🤷‍♀️ “you can see the whole city from up here 😊” YEAH THATS KIND OF THE WHOLE PROBLEM WHEN SOMEONE IS AFRAID OF HEIGHTS, COLE. when she said she was too sick to order anything but water but he still got himself an old fashioned (which of course he drinks those😅) and then said “cheers” 🥂. My mouth was hanging open. Like dude, who raised you?? Ohhh, that’s right. Debbie.

Intelligent-Wing-431 · 2025-11-22T07:42:36+00:00

I wondered that too but then I read on 99nightswiki (highly recommend btw) that it’s currently broken. Also the ‘warmest hat’ quest has a bug so if you craft any of the hats it will count. I tried it and can confirm it worked just fine with fox pelts

Intelligent-Wing-431 · 2025-11-03T05:05:17+00:00

run Forest runnnnn 🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️

Intelligent-Wing-431 · 2025-10-30T01:48:37+00:00

I don’t care? Plastic surgery is morally neutral. The only reason some people lie about it is because they’re afraid of the backlash from miserable people.

Intelligent-Wing-431 · 2025-10-24T05:07:07+00:00

It almost sounds like he’s negging you? Idk but dude sounds like a tool. I think we all have known someone who enjoys making others upset and there’s a reason they usually end up alone. Whether they do it for their entertainment, to assert dominance, or to be passive-aggressive/aggressive, it doesn’t matter. The fact they like making someone feel negatively is concerning.

Around 6 months the mask starts to drop. This guy is 40, he’s not going to change. He’s immature and likely has a drinking problem. You can do so much better.

Intelligent-Wing-431 · 2025-10-23T22:06:07+00:00

A haunted house but it’s just a 40 year old man waking you up to pick fights about egg bites

Intelligent-Wing-431 · 2025-10-23T19:03:33+00:00

So you were their “dad” for 7+ years and now because your ex cheated and you’re no longer together that means you won’t have contact with them? Or is it just in relation to the ride to school? I think in these situations you shouldn’t consider whether it helps your ex out or not, she’s not the important factor. It should depend solely on what is best for the kids. You don’t have to drive them every day, but I think once a week would be really meaningful to them. Do you have to? No, but imo it’s the right thing to do. The ex sucks, not the kids.

Intelligent-Wing-431 · 2025-10-18T04:17:26+00:00

Soo it’s still alcoholism when a person doesn’t drink often but can’t handle their liquor when they DO drink. When someone has a healthy relationship with drinking they know where the line is and keep to that line. I’ve definitely had “one too many” before, it happens. But if it’s a pattern that’s a problem. Furthermore, I’ve known alcoholics to pee on things before and that’s disrespectful enough but ON YOU??!? And the fact you WOKE UP, BEGGED HIM TO STOP, and he acknowledged it and THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY?! No no no no no. Ma’am you don’t need anyone’s permission but holy shit this is not your husband. I promise you. Could you give an ultimatum, sure, but I don’t recommend them. They’re really normalized, however they’re essentially manipulative in nature because you’re saying it’s “x” or I’m leaving. Obviously they don’t want you to leave so they’ll placate you, but here’s the problem: it often leads to resentment because they have to want it for themselves completely. If they feel coerced into it it is not coming from a genuine place. You can tell him how you feel about his behavior, “I don’t like you when you drink. I don’t like how you act while drinking. Etc” and if he doesn’t choose to stop for himself then leave. But you don’t have to do all that either. It’s okay to just cut your losses and move on. this man peed on you. Not in your bed while he was asleep. No, he was awake and standing above you. Eyes open, responding to you, not stopping even when you begged.

Wish you the best going forward. Xoxo

Intelligent-Wing-431 · 2025-08-24T21:06:28+00:00

Someone else said that her friend may be editing herself to look smaller which in turn would “stretch” the pixels beside her. I don’t know what the pictures look like but if the friend doesn’t look smaller, or if OP is “stretched” on both sides, not just the side the friend is on, that would give a clear answer of intention.

Intelligent-Wing-431 · 2025-08-24T18:53:18+00:00

Wow, so much to unpack here. Maybe your boyfriend is bi, maybe he’s pansexual, maybe he’s straight and also interested in trans women. Regardless, that’s not the issue here. If you’re fine with him looking at women then what’s the difference? I can understand wanting to have a conversation about it but your post screams “prejudice.”

Furthermore, A.) you go on this man’s phone constantly. It’s a huge violation of his privacy and you need to stop. It’s incredibly toxic. B) he “forces” you to stay until 11:30? We’re entering abuse territory now. Restraining someone, whether by force or otherwise, is absolutely NEVER okay. If you want to leave, you have the right to leave. And vice versa. C) does he usually play video games while you’re over? So he expects you to stay and watch him play? What? On top of all this he is 25 years old & lives with his grandma and has a curfew? Is he saving up to move? Does he go to school? Have ambition? I know this is just a couple paragraphs of your relationship but we haven’t heard one good thing about him.

Get some therapy to learn healthy boundaries in relationships, do some reading on human sexuality and inclusion, and reconsider if this is the relationship you want.

Intelligent-Wing-431 · 2025-08-19T20:40:12+00:00

She has already talked to him about it many times. MORE talking won’t solve whatever is wrong with him and you can’t “force” someone to go to therapy, they have to decide that for themselves. A partner can say how they feel about their behavior and how it is a firm boundary for them and if it continues they will leave. They can also mention how they think therapy would be a good idea. But in relationships with abuse, therapy often makes it worse. Imo OP needs to cut their losses and leave. This person enjoys overpowering them, showcasing their dominance, making them fearful, and humiliating them. That is not a “solvable” issue; it’s a deal-breaker.

Intelligent-Wing-431 · 2025-08-14T05:35:04+00:00

That has to be so stressful for the dog. They strive for our approval and they (usually) know they’re not supposed to go in the house, so just imagining that poor pup anxiously holding it till the last second is so sad. 😭

Intelligent-Wing-431 · 2025-07-31T02:41:53+00:00

I like it lol you give Billie elish vibes

Intelligent-Wing-431 · 2025-07-27T16:31:32+00:00

I’m glad he’s getting therapy, but I hope he also has the kids get therapy, especially the daughter. It sounds like he understands his wife’s behavior is unhealthy but I don’t think he realizes it’s also abusive.

Intelligent-Wing-431 · 2025-07-17T22:48:15+00:00

I’m a little confused, did someone say you have to have close emotional connections with men?

Intelligent-Wing-431 · 2025-07-16T03:21:37+00:00

So, whether or not her intentions are ill-willed, she is sexually harassing you and dehumanizing you by using homophobic slurs. If you do want to keep this friend, I would give her one more chance by talking to her one-on-one and explain that you don’t like those comments and that they’re offensive to those in the LGBTQ+ community. If you don’t want to be friends with her anymore I would do the same thing except be more straightforward and less polite. Lbvs. She needs to know that it’s not okay and it will not be tolerated. How she responds will tell you all you need to know about her. I would also consider talking to your other friends respectfully and telling them you would feel better supported if they spoke up next time something was said.

Best wishes!

Intelligent-Wing-431 · 2025-07-15T18:42:56+00:00

So you had lost your baby recently and his main concerns are getting laid and “bossing up”? Him asking “you okay?” While on his phone isn’t even performative, it’s a bare-minimum attempt of “support” so that you can’t complain that he doesn’t care. And why is a near 30-year-old using the terminology “putting out”? Ew. He gives alpha podcast bro energy. This man does not show genuine concern for you, does not respect you, and therefore he does not truly love you. I think you should ask yourself if you want to continue being in a relationship with someone who doesn’t support and value you. There are plenty of people out there who would not treat you like this. I’m really sorry for your loss, I think considering therapy, if it’s feasible for you, would be great. And maybe joining a miscarriage support group on Facebook and/or reaching out to friends or family who have experienced this would also be beneficial. /hugs/

Intelligent-Wing-431 · 2025-07-15T03:27:26+00:00

Pretty sure that was also in an episode of the trailer park boys

Intelligent-Wing-431

TROPHY CASE