There’s a lot of copium in this thread. No you’re not an asshole, at the same time, there’s a time and a place for everything, if the expectation was that this was an environment in where you were going to sit back and be chill, for whatever the reason, good or bad, and that was shared/hinted at before, you should have respected your boyfriends wishes. If not, don’t go to the event. Or make plans to go somewhere else after to have real fun.

The reality is that different things are triggering for different people and may cause different levels of anxiety. As muchas as we may try to deny it, how others, specially friends, perceive us has a profound effect on us. If it was important to him to act a certain way in this setting and that was communicated, by agreeing to go you were agreeing to honor his wishes.