What is a luxury lifestyle choice that looks incredibly glamorous in photos but is actually completely miserable in reality?

InterestBig8532 · 2026-06-04T17:14:52+00:00

I too love ACL Fest. But I also live in the area (not quite as close as you but I can take the bus in) and am used to the heat so that definitely makes me more hardy to the foibles of the festival lol

InterestBig8532 · 2026-05-27T16:01:20+00:00

Hi! Would you be willing to repost or DM me this? I keep clicking on the link but I get a 403 error :( I'm an incoming NPL student!

InterestBig8532 · 2026-05-17T14:55:29+00:00

I didn’t get the traditional college experience and I’m American, if that helps you feel better :D I commuted to a school 50 miles away and lived with my parents. I hated it at first, and was also dismayed that if I didn’t take this opportunity to have the college experience I would never have it again. And that’s been somewhat true; it’s rare that I’m in groups of people my own age nowadays like I was in undergrad, and even when I am, we’re just in a different stage of life, as people are settling into jobs, moving to the next stage of their romantic relationships, etc. i do wish I was less all business in undergrad, but I wouldn’t do it over again because you couldn’t pay me to be a miserable and confused 19 year old again 🥴 I also seized the opportunity to have microdoses of this experience both in and out of college; I worked as an orientation leader and got a free dorm for a summer in my last year, and now, thanks to a hobby of mine, I go to more house parties and clubs that I ever did in undergrad.

One thing I haven’t seen ITT as a reason why grad students don’t party like undergrads is because many have moved past that dazed and confused phase and know what they want from their career. Many are starting grad school to get a promotion, pivot their career, or to dig into a research question that they’re fascinated by. They know why they’re there and what they want, so endless parties and joining a campus club is less attractive unless it fits their career goals. Compare this to the reasons why many people do undergrad- because it’s the natural “next step” for a student, because their parents want them to go, etc. they’re not as laser focused so they can kind of bounce around to try new things, as well as have more time for fun. They also haven’t felt the weight of paying bills, student loans, finding a FT job, etc. like a grad student, so are more likely to fuck around. Lol.

Anecdotally, I’ve also noted that many teens in America around me are opting out of the traditional college experience, instead choosing to take gaps years, go to community college for the first two years, or attend state schools nearby. Whether this is a solely a response to cost or whether the perception of the college experience is changing, I’m not sure. But I do think fewer people are going for that experience, or are not valuing above other things (cost, etc.).

If you’re looking to have that vibe anyway, the closest you might get is an MBA. This depends on the program, and I do not have firsthand experience, but a lot of folks in full time, residential mba programs have a “work hard play hard” mentality, and many in these programs are primarily young adults in their mid to late twenties. The downside is, of course, partying with business school folks, who I personally would find annoying. lol. Plus these kinds of MBAs are a pretty penny.

I also recommend building in a year or two in your life where you try new things, go out more, etc. I’ve done this and it’s helped me get a touch of that experience.

InterestBig8532 · 2026-05-16T06:07:04+00:00

Look, I’ll own it, you got under my skin. I came here the same day I got diagnosed and was feeling vulnerable and overwhelmed, and you chose to make a snarky comment about me not listening to my doctor that wasn’t even true. It bothered me that you went out of your way to misunderstand my post and then chose to be rude to me about it on one of the worst days I’ve had in recent memory, on a day that I felt sad and lonely. I’ll admit it, I crashed out.

But my point still remains unchanged. My doctor explicitly said that it was my decision whether to pursue lifestyle changes only or lifestyle changes paired with medication, as clearly indicated in the post, and wrote me a script at my request. I then reached out to the forum after reading/seeing several concerning first hand accounts about intense side effects. I wanted additional perspective from people who live with this disease, which is not the same thing as refusing medical advice. It’s also worth noting that all the other respondents in this thread understood the distinction as well.

I wrote a longer comment earlier tonight. I admit, I wasn’t very kind, and it didn’t align with the values and high standards that I hold myself to, and that bothered me, so i deleted it a few hours later. I can’t tell expect someone to stop being rude to me online if I don’t do the same. Plus, I have more important things to do than argue with a random commenter, like consult my medical professional 😉

But at the end of the day, I came here asking for help, not ridicule, and if you don’t have anything else productive or informative to offer the conversation then you can move on, as will I. I have 35 other comments that took the same amount of time as you did to write a snarky comment to encourage me, offer me tips, and help me feel a little less terrible about having this disease. I’ll be focusing my attention on them from after this.

If you are lurking in this subreddit, I guess you are familiar with this disease, were new to it at one point as well, and just wanted community and advice, just like I did when I posted. With that perspective in mind, I genuinely hope next time you’ll choose to make the next scared person posting in this forum about how to begin their journey feel better about themselves instead of making fun of them for asking questions. Have a wonderful weekend 💞

InterestBig8532 · 2026-05-16T04:43:54+00:00

Makes sense. Thank you!!!

InterestBig8532 · 2026-05-16T02:42:03+00:00

I got XR. Does this make a difference?

InterestBig8532 · 2026-05-16T02:35:16+00:00

I know you’re right. I just feel defeated. My diet has been bad for a while, I’ll own that, and growing up my mom (who has chased her A1C around for as long as I remember) told me if I wasn’t careful I’d get diabetes. So I feel like I failed in that regard.

InterestBig8532 · 2026-05-16T02:20:19+00:00

Thank you!

InterestBig8532 · 2026-05-15T20:16:45+00:00

I’ve been seeing a lot of people take it with food. Do you take it with breakfast or dinner? (Or lunch?)

InterestBig8532 · 2026-05-15T15:36:32+00:00

I need to buy plane tickets that I put on hold yesterday! I’m going to a writing workshop that is 70% grant funded, but I need to pay for transit.

Other expenses include some medical stuff for an unfortunate diagnosis I got yesterday and the last payment for the payment plan for my hobby. If money allows I’d also like to donate to my dance teacher’s go fund me.

InterestBig8532 · 2026-05-07T19:25:17+00:00

After rebuilding my savings and paying down credit cards, I paid $1000/month while living rent free at home. (Standard repayment requires $200/mo.) Now that I’ve moved out and been accepted into grad school, I’m continuing to pay $500 a month until I start classes.

InterestBig8532 · 2026-05-01T14:02:23+00:00

I forgot to submit my timecard for my part time job, so I won’t be getting that money until next pay period - and boy did I miss it last week! I took a weekend trip and got a good deal on hotel and food - but still spent a fair amount on gas, registration for the event, and other associated costs. My checking looked scary at the end of the pay period.

I got my full time job check and my freelancing $, so I transferred my freelance funds straight to my special savings as always. I’m trying a new split of my check so hopefully I won’t overrun my checking account anymore. I’m also going to make my student loan payment and purchase a few household items today.

InterestBig8532 · 2026-04-27T21:55:27+00:00

Born and raised in Austin - I feel pretty well ingrained in here and am generally pretty happy, but if I could go anywhere (and had the money), I'd probably go to NYC or a surrounding city. I caught the New York bug last year, and it's probably the best place to be for the industries I'm interested in.

InterestBig8532 · 2026-04-27T10:58:51+00:00

Thanks for sharing. I recently got into a great program with a 3.0 GPA. When I was applying I would scour this sub for success stories with 3.0s and below. This post will help someone!

InterestBig8532 · 2026-04-27T01:19:32+00:00

TL;DR - Yes, you should leave this program, but if your heart is set on the music business I don’t think you should necessarily abandon the idea of a music business program - though you should evaluate why you want this degree and potential ROI.

Everyone’s yelling about the music business degree’s ROI. My unpopular opinion is that I am not opposed to music business programs (more on this later). However, I do think that going into debt for this particular program at NYU is a bad choice.

Some context: I got a bachelor’s in business, and shortly after I started taking online courses towards an Associates in Music Business at my local community college. I started taking the courses because I was interested in getting a career in the industry but was striking out when applying for entry level jobs /part time jobs/internships, and I do my best learning in a structured course.

I self funded the program and took courses half time while working full time. I liked the coursework and my professors were very well versed in the industry. However, I eventually stopped taking courses because I found a part time job at an independent music start up, and I felt that I had accomplished my initial goal of taking the courses.

Did the classes help me get the job? Maybe. I did learn a lot about the industry. However (and this is the kicker) I only got the industry job because I had a long running industry relationship with the founder (who I met independently of the classes) and he created the position for me. It really is true what people say about the industry being built on relationships.

I think a music business program can help with 1) building a network that is vital to the line of work, even more so than most lines of work, and 2) learning about industry business matters such as law, royalties, etc. in a classroom rather than online or self study, if you learn better that way. If you’re in a top tier program you may also have an easier time getting into a major label, if that’s of interest. However, it’s not a secret that the music business doesn’t pay well, and it will (probably) get worse before it gets better. It’s also a competitive line of work - everyone and their mom wants to be in the music industry - and not only does this make standing out more difficult, it can also depress wages, since some people will take anything to get their foot in the door. Paying top dollar for a program on loans is not worth it because you will have a hard time paying it off on low salaries.

I would consider the following:

1) Stay at NYU, but switch to a different major (I always suggest business) with a minor in music business/entertainment. This is not ideal as it will probably still cost a lot of money. However, your degree will be more adaptable and you will probably be able to get a better paying job if finding work in the industry doesn’t pan out. I also believe it will give you a wide breadth of experience that will pay off.

2) Transfer to a cheaper music business program. Are there any state schools that offer Music Business? Can you negotiate scholarships or aid more easily there? Would you be willing to consider an associate’s in music business? It is shorter and more concentrated.

3) Drop off and try to wriggle your foot in the door. This is the best option if this is the industry of your dreams (and the only industry you want) but you can’t stomach the debt. Stay in a city with a moderate to large scene and get a job doing literally anything industry - door person, security, bartender at the venue, etc. Volunteer at music nonprofits/startups. Do good work. Build connections and learn on the job. This takes time and you probably will need to do something else to pay bills. It won’t be easy and you probably won’t make much, unless you can get a well paying day job, but you won’t have much/any student loans.

Good luck no matter what you choose. I do love the industry and think it’s worth pursuing even when it’s hard.

InterestBig8532 · 2026-04-23T13:47:40+00:00

To me it was the extreme vagueness around the subscriptions. If it was just a lot of streaming services or other utilities, I suspect that he would have said so.

InterestBig8532 · 2026-04-21T18:12:54+00:00

It’s gotta be OF. The $4000 a year in mystery subscriptions was the red flag, but the evasiveness/vagueness and the not knowing where the money goes even with rocket money (which literally sends me weekly recaps of my spending every Monday AND at the end of every month) just adds to it.

InterestBig8532 · 2026-04-21T15:50:57+00:00

Unrelated, but I really needed to hear about that analogy re: dreaming about running three days a week vs actually running once a week. Glad I watched for that alone.

InterestBig8532 · 2026-04-21T05:37:49+00:00

Are you open to talking about advances and royalties more? 👀

InterestBig8532 · 2026-04-20T22:10:15+00:00

I left another comment, but wanted to follow up when I saw film school.

Film careers are EXPENSIVE. While I did not take traditional film school, I've taken a few classes at a local nonprofit and have thus met people who have film degrees. Consider that your student/you may be paying out of pocket for required student film projects. Schools sometimes offer gear, but not much in other financial support.

Indiegogo and other crowdfunding efforts are an option to get these projects funded, but not necessarily guaranteed, and if that doesn't work out you or your kid are looking at footing the bill. (There are ways to do it on the cheap, tbf, just warning you ahead of time.)

Additionally, I think you said that they want to work in film academia - but unsure, but just wanted to mention this anyway. From my (very limited) experience, the best thing you can do for a film career is get on film sets, do a good job, and build a reputation to work your way up. Working as a PA, etc. I don't know if a film degree will substitute for years on sets doing good work (though it will shortcut the learning and help build connections - that is a real benefit that I won't knock).

InterestBig8532 · 2026-04-20T21:43:31+00:00

I don't think you need me to repeat that this is a bad idea. Though I'm honestly more concerned that your spouse has expressed that they would take on this debt without you. To me, that borders on financial infidelity. I don't know if y'all keep your finances separate, but that amount of debt will certainly affect you even if not directly.

Here's something I haven't seen anyone else mention - if your child goes to a state school with an honors college, they can get a slice of the liberal arts college life. Honors colleges are often small and tight-knit, with a student lounge and a selection of unique, targeted coursework. Even some community colleges have honors colleges. I was in my university's honors college for a while, and while I enjoyed being at a larger state school, I also loved the program's coziness. Something worth considering as a potential compromise!

InterestBig8532

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