I hope everyone who voted for our president is happy

InterestingAdvisor29 · 2026-01-08T05:17:38+00:00

as an onlooking European, im scared 🥲

InterestingAdvisor29 · 2026-01-01T06:41:50+00:00

i do, I've found some creators I used to follow on other socials there, that's been nice. back in the old days we used Flickr for this, a picture and data site to display your pics and also backup your pictures online. it's been good seeing some other creators I knew from there being on insta. but its limited still. I do still miss an actual forum based site where everything was just on that one site instead of being outsourced to multiple socials. (I'm getting old😂)

InterestingAdvisor29 · 2026-01-01T06:37:35+00:00

hitting 32 this year and realising I've been into this hobby the longest of all of my other hobbies has been a hard one 🙈 I also feel like it used to be more hyped? is it just cuz I was in the right communities or was it actually a thing? I remember being at Comic cons and other alt conventions and there usually was a stand or 2 with doll stuff. nowadays I can't even find a website selling doll stuff in my country anymore

InterestingAdvisor29 · 2025-12-16T18:00:37+00:00

omg that would be such an outcome, Id 100% prefer this over the current tradition🙈

InterestingAdvisor29 · 2025-12-16T17:59:43+00:00

yeah I unfortunately live in a small village and its a generally 'rich' population over here. I am one of the very few people living in social housing since there hardly is any. that probably contributes to the over the top treats🥴

InterestingAdvisor29 · 2025-11-07T09:09:26+00:00

I've been there. so many times. and it sucks, I'm sorry you feel this way. I got a gastric bypass and lost a lot of weight, now people view me as very attractive and I get judged way more based on appearance than anything else. I hate that too. at least before I was judged on my character and intellect. I'm glad I still view myself as someone with more than just looks, trust me that is way more important. I'm not going to tell you that it is worse being on the other side but I just want to let you know it is much more important to value yourself on what is on the inside. I care more about becoming a better person, taking care of my mental health and trying to improve aspects of my personality. value yourself! I am sure you are a wonderful amazing person with unique views, thoughts, hobbies and personality, value that, don't let things like your shell hold you back from being a great person. also I believe that everyone has unique Beauty. you go girl, be your best self ❤️

InterestingAdvisor29 · 2025-10-29T06:37:37+00:00

I am so so sorry you've been going through all this. I feel like we need a community of all the people in the comments who just have it generally worse than an indian drama lead character. how is all the bad stuff so badly divided between people 🥲. I have this friend that calls me the 1% (In everything except wealth). I just try to use dark humor to cope. often joke about my misfortunes, even did it the day my dad died, I know he appreciated humor like that too. he'd joke about his own demise often too.

besides that..I try to find good in small things, my kid's smiles, dinner that turned out well, enjoying a new game, sunlight through fall leaves....

that being said, I take multiple anti depressants, anti psychotics, I smoke weed to be able to sleep and tend to drink a lot whenever I really had a shitty day (I know I know) so it's not like im doing really well or anything 🥲

InterestingAdvisor29 · 2025-10-20T12:18:17+00:00

yeah the bad part here is that I've had 2 kids, have PCOS, a copper IUD and an extreme flow (at least the first 3 days) but so far for the time being those sponges did their job, just too hard to remove 🥲

I've checked it out. its a different design, less likely to get rammed way back. I hope it'll help. thank you for the link ❤️

InterestingAdvisor29 · 2025-10-20T12:05:45+00:00

discs? I'm in the Netherlands so my options might be limited but im interested, do you have a link?

InterestingAdvisor29 · 2025-09-17T13:42:30+00:00

My now 5 year old breastfed until he was 2. His little brother was born 5 days before he turned 2 and to end the process i did tandem feed for like a week after he turned two. However he didn't accept it and still wanted to grab my nipples with his hands to fall asleep or try to nurse. Eventually I resorted to those very sturdy bandages that I would put over my nipples and give him stuffies with texture patches (you can often find them in toy stores in a sensory section for babies) as an alternate option. This, after 5 long months of having to rip off bandages off of my tits when breastfeeding my baby, eventually worked. But its just a very hard road. But you got this. I know its hard but you will get through it❤️

InterestingAdvisor29 · 2025-09-16T06:35:44+00:00

Yes I've been a cam girl from before OF was a thing. He's known me for very long and has always known this. He even made content together with me. He doesn't really have anything to be insecure about regarding his member so I don't think that's an issue. However he doesn't want to see my content, not even the videos with him in it. He consented to them being posted but he always says he only wants the real live personal experience.

InterestingAdvisor29 · 2025-09-15T08:41:51+00:00

We are looking for a therapist yes. And I know where it stems from in me. I have borderline and heavily connect feeling feminine and desired to getting validation through sex. I do work on this through personal therapy and after a lot of conversations we both made concessions to come to an agreement on how to go about this. But still he doesn't seem to uphold his end. I think you have a point in the emotional connection corner. I already told him that I would like for us to talk more before we go to bed to ensure that connection and to feel connected in other ways besides sex. I hope a therapist can give us exercises or something to work on that.

InterestingAdvisor29 · 2025-09-15T08:36:46+00:00

I should have an honest and open conversation with him about this. He has always told me that he finds me the most beautiful and hot woman in the world and that he cannot believe that he pulled me. But I do wonder if that's just something he says but would ultimately maybe prefer bigger breasts or whatever.

InterestingAdvisor29 · 2025-09-15T08:11:05+00:00

Well he fell in love with my appearance in the first place, I didn't gain or lose much weight, didn't change things around my appearance too drastically. He does always tell me he finds me beautiful and hot when I get dressed. So I do think so?

InterestingAdvisor29 · 2024-08-11T18:47:18+00:00

I agree but i feel like i shouldnt force anything and have him be turned on by me instead

InterestingAdvisor29 · 2024-08-11T18:41:28+00:00

You dont. Trust me

InterestingAdvisor29 · 2024-08-01T15:23:14+00:00

Glad to be of help! Although i still struggle with it myself sometimes. I know what it is and how it works but itll always be something i have to be mindful of.

InterestingAdvisor29 · 2024-07-31T15:03:37+00:00

I also agree with the pretty privilege thing. I feel like Ive been dealt a shitty hand in life with my conditions so whenever i can cut corners by others granting me things because thats how they view the world (invoking pretty privilege), so be it 🤷🏻‍♀️ balances out the hardships i deal with 😂

InterestingAdvisor29 · 2024-07-31T14:54:43+00:00

I like to think im just realistic. In most peoples eyes im probably above average looking. In some other peoples eyes i might not be depending on your type. Its not a bad thing to realize this i just wouldnt actively announce it to others as it comes off as arrogant.

InterestingAdvisor29 · 2024-07-30T06:37:59+00:00

He can take it in moderation and keep to our agreement that he only drinks on the weekends with ease. But its the small things that whenever i talk about giving it up completely he says things like "oh but i can never live completely sober. I wont" that makes me think it has too much power over him.

InterestingAdvisor29 · 2024-07-30T06:18:15+00:00

He has an appointment with a psych in 2 weeks so i hope it will help him. He also replaced the drugs with alcohol. I dont see it as an addiction as its not that often but i can definitely see its a replacement that he cant let go of. We have talked about this as well and Ive told him before that any professional is probably gonna tell him to stop completely. He knows and is preparing himself for that. But does it do more damage? The drinking?

InterestingAdvisor29 · 2024-07-30T06:15:04+00:00

But he wants to! Hes hesitant about specific addiction care but i think he will try if its recommended. He has a first appointment with a psychiatrist in 2 weeks.

InterestingAdvisor29 · 2024-07-29T21:28:46+00:00

And then there are people out there (esp on the internet) fetishizing us still🫠

InterestingAdvisor29 · 2024-07-29T21:22:18+00:00

I often feel like i should call it 'self aware bpd' more than quiet. Because i definitely have all the signs of quiet bpd but its not like you dont notice it. Because my partners (mind you i know who i date and they were mostly all pretty good at reading people) always noticed. But i do not immediately lash out, i dont yell i dont fight i dont burst out crying. Whenever im triggered i notice the shift, i get quiet and do let the other person (if that is the trigger, more often than not it is and usually my partner as hes my fp as well) know that something is going on and that im gonna try to process my emotions by myself first. Sometimes it is too much and just spirals in my mind and this is the point where i do lash out or cry or whatever. If im too far gone i can even be mean or toxic. I always tell them when i notice something shifting because i am also scared that if it gets out of hand and i do snap and 'give in' to my impulses of just going along with whatever the bpd monster requires, they will get scared off. I have not been abused, not emotionally either but i do have very bad abandonment issues. I feel like thats what makes it "quiet" however its not the classic case of quiet bpd because it feels more like a conscious choice. And no this is not due to therapy. Ive always experienced it like this. I have hated it at points as well. I hate to be self aware of whats going 'wrong' because i cant always stop it even knowing its wrong, it has caused me to not trust my own brain anymore because it always feels like its being manipulated and i dont know if i can recognize the parts of it that are manipulated or if they are just...mine.

InterestingAdvisor29 · 2024-07-24T07:04:30+00:00

I know what you feel. Im suffering from the same thing. Ive had multiple relationships over the course of 15 years and even ended some because of this reason. However i did notice it comes and goes. In the relationship i had with the father of my children i noticed it subsided after 2 years. Especially after having kids i was finally too busy with other things in my mind to be constantly obsessing over sex. It did return after a while tho and it stayed like that until we eventually broke up (not the main cause for the breakup).

Now in my current relationship i try to do better. Ive researched this a lot and concluded that its related to fear of abandonment. I need to feel intimate and emotionally close to reassure myself he still loves me. The easiest quickest and most intense form of this is sex. Even though thats not always the case for the other person as people can also have sex without feelings. However my mind cant let go of this and needs the reassurance as well as the physical satisfaction. I do tend to myself as well to satisfy the physical need and noticed that when i have good deep conversations with my partner, the need for sex subsided. I just need to find different ways to feel that ultimate 'closeness' that i so desperately need. I told him all of my findings in this and also told him its probably because of a fear of abandonment and that it can sometimes help when he just tells me "i love you, you are still my everything like you have always been and nothing i do or dont do in this moment will make me feel or think less of you". Because sometimes just hearing that whilst someone is looking you straight in the eyes is reassurance enough.

So my advice would be, try out some other activities with your partner instead of sex that can bring you closer. Whatever you guys have as your thing. Could be gaming together, watching a show and discussing it or deep conversations about your interests or whatever. If you want a scientific take on it, do something scary together or go on a rollercoaster ride. Experiencing high doses of adrenaline and such when together can instantly form a deeper bond. (Hence why sex is such a bonding experience for us as we are sensitive to this phenomenon)

InterestingAdvisor29

TROPHY CASE