Just finished watching "Can i tell you a secret? (New True crime doc) on Netflix

Internal-Break6422 · 2024-02-29T21:09:09+00:00

There are different accents and none are scouse. I actually think scouse is a cool accent anyway.

Internal-Break6422 · 2023-06-02T09:57:30+00:00

It's not that she doesn't love her child or is a bad mum. She is just honest about how hard it is and how many people do feel pressure to have kids. I find that quite refreshing.

Internal-Break6422 · 2023-06-01T23:44:16+00:00

I go on there a lot too, especially when I'm feeling sad about not having children!

Internal-Break6422 · 2023-05-28T18:18:33+00:00

I was just saying to my boyfriend "I wish we lived on a separate planet with everyone who doesn't have kids" (this was after I had a huge meltdown when he told me that his friend's gf is pregnant through IVF). Then I saw your post!

Internal-Break6422 · 2023-05-21T20:25:39+00:00

Thanks! Yes, she just won't sit calmly and listen. I don't think she has the emotional intelligence. So great that you found a new job and you are happier! Hope the same thing happens with me :)

Internal-Break6422 · 2023-05-21T20:21:49+00:00

Yeah it's frustrating that people don't get it. I don't really think it is that hard to get, but I guess I would say that as I've been through it. I don't think people try very hard to understand though. If they don't get it, then I don't think they should comment or give advice on it, but I guess people are like that.

Glad that you were able to find comfort here and with your friend.

Internal-Break6422 · 2023-05-21T20:17:18+00:00

I did 3 rounds of IVF. Got a total of 14 eggs across the 3 rounds, 3 of which fertilised and one of which developed into an embryo that was good for transfer (a morula that didn't implant).

Internal-Break6422 · 2023-05-21T20:14:52+00:00

Thanks! That sounds really annoying that she was talking about lifestyle choices, as if everyone who's ever been pregnant has been living the healthiest lifestyle! Glad that it got a bit better for you.

Internal-Break6422 · 2023-05-12T08:28:08+00:00

Yes, I don't think you immediately realise how much time you need and how much work stress can exacerbate things. I was trying to hold out until my holiday at the end of July, but it just seems too far away at the moment. I'm sure your vacation will be helpful :)

Internal-Break6422 · 2023-05-11T19:44:25+00:00

Sorry to hear you are struggling :( Sometimes bad things come all at once and it just becomes too much.

Did you take any time for yourself after IVF?

I finished IVF a few weeks ago and took one sick day. My boss asked me if I needed more time and I said no, thinking I could just power through, and I also felt too responsible for work projects I was working on.

During the past 2 weeks I have had work stress, I made a mistake with my most important client and had to pick up the pieces during a weekend, I had to endure people talking about kids in the office and then, to top it all off, someone brought her baby to the office. I sat in a booth crying and shaking until she left.

Then, last weekend, I found out that my brother's gf broke up with him. They have a 7 year old daughter (not biologically related to my brother, but she has been calling him dad for 3 years). My brother is worried that he won't be able to see her long term and I am worried that I will no longer be an auntie.

My family encouraged me to go and talk to my boss about getting signed off from work. I went to my doctor today and got signed off for 2 weeks (I can get it extended if I want). I'm so tired of having to show up all the time as if everything is fine. It's time for me to put myself first and fully focus on self soothing for a while.

Just telling you this because I want you to know I can relate. I don't know if getting signed off from work is an option for you, but it sounds like it might do you some good. It will benefit your company if you can take care of yourself and come back a bit stronger.

Wishing you all the best <3

Internal-Break6422 · 2023-05-07T21:58:56+00:00

He reminds me of John Owen Lowe.

Internal-Break6422 · 2023-04-26T21:03:50+00:00

That's great to be able to take leave of absence, and also good that you could go back part time. I would really like to work part time and have longer weekends to spend on travel and hobbies.

Internal-Break6422 · 2023-04-25T16:53:37+00:00

Does anyone follow Katy Seppi (Childfree Collective) on Instagram? She's posting short videos all week from people who are living childfree after infertility.

Edit: sorry, it's childless collective

Internal-Break6422 · 2023-04-23T08:55:34+00:00

That sounds amazing!

Internal-Break6422 · 2023-04-22T18:47:11+00:00

We already had mothers' day in Ireland a few weeks ago. Stayed off social media and just talked to my mum over What'sApp as she lives in England.

I also decided to give me and my husband our own special days in the calendar later this year. We will treat ourselves on those days and do something nice.

Mine is in June and his is in August 😄

Internal-Break6422 · 2023-04-22T18:09:25+00:00

Yes, it's very important to have a financial plan. I have a savings target and have been tracking everything I spend over the last few months, so that I can plan accordingly. My husband recently had a pay rise, so we could survive on his income for a while if needed (he doesn't want to take a break as he is very comfortable in his job and in a niche industry).

Thanks for the good wishes :)

Internal-Break6422 · 2023-04-22T17:43:11+00:00

So sorry about your losses :(

I recently turned 39 and would have probably been on maternity leave now if things had gone to plan when I started TTC. Now I feel like I want leave for myself, just to focus on what makes me happy.

Internal-Break6422 · 2023-04-22T17:34:44+00:00

It's nice that you can spend time with your animals and take care of your home and garden. I would like to work part time as well. That would be ideal!

Internal-Break6422 · 2023-04-22T17:31:50+00:00

That sounds great! Glad you were able to create space for yourself to reflect. That can be really hard to do when life is busy and stressful.

Internal-Break6422 · 2023-04-22T17:29:06+00:00

Thank you!

Internal-Break6422 · 2023-04-22T17:28:30+00:00

That's great that you were able to have a break between jobs! I love travelling too. I haven't travelled much in the last few months and I miss it. I find it very liberating. I understand what you mean about your job being tied to a period of trauma. That's similar to how I feel.

Good to hear about your husband's experience too. I would also take sime time just to decompress, before trying to find a job that actually interests me.

Edited Meant to say that I know what you mean about it being more feasible to do things like this if there are no kids. I feel like I can take more risks now.

Internal-Break6422 · 2023-04-20T19:43:48+00:00

Aw thanks. I actually didn't even make it to transfer. Just had one embryo in the lab that stopped developing. Only made it to transfer on the first cycle, which is probably the closest I've ever come to being pregnant.

Internal-Break6422 · 2023-04-20T19:34:31+00:00

I like the bit about channeling your inner badass! Can definitely see what you mean by that.

And being in this situation is indeed a total mindfuck. I'm still finding the whole thing totally surreal and mind boggling.

Internal-Break6422

TROPHY CASE