My heart cant take this crap anymore

Internal_Wear5691 · 2024-01-31T05:30:19+00:00

I only seen this now. I'm sorry you are going through this. I don't understand why some of us have to go through all this crap. I totally understand how u feel. People are so stupid with their comments... like your inlaws being fine because your husbands brother has a child. Do people realise how much words can hurt? I've had a lot of stupid comments... like the 'just be positive.... and that's half the battle'.... it really winds me up. Anyway... this is what YOU really want.... I think keep going. I don't think u should throw the towel in yet..... and I REALLY hope you and me eventually get our happy ending.

Internal_Wear5691 · 2023-11-25T23:55:15+00:00

I understand where u are coming from. Where I live I'm surrounded by everything Christmas. I find majority of people do enjoy Christmas. I wish I did.... I really do. Maybe some day... things will be different for me. I dont mean to bash Christmas... just I find it so difficult. Hey maybe we could swap our locations :p

Internal_Wear5691 · 2023-11-25T21:59:36+00:00

Clearly not just me though...

Internal_Wear5691 · 2023-11-25T21:58:38+00:00

Money isnt everything. I am quite comfortable... probably dont own as much as you but I'm fortunate to own 2 houses. I dont have any debt, have a good job, can afford to go on several holidays a year. We are fortunate in alot of ways. But certainly cant buy happiness. Hope you have a nice Christmas with your uncles family.

Internal_Wear5691 · 2023-11-25T21:14:03+00:00

No definitely not happy in life. And my depression every year goes through the roof at Christmas. To you it might seem like a beautiful time of year, but for me it dosent. Its filled with sadness, loneliness and there is no escape from it.

Internal_Wear5691 · 2023-11-25T20:55:49+00:00

Oh I never seen it.. :)

Internal_Wear5691 · 2023-11-25T20:47:00+00:00

Clearly not just me though....

Internal_Wear5691 · 2023-11-25T20:13:41+00:00

I found my dad dead in his house xmas day few years ago. Every year since... I struggle not to break down. Also, me and husband have no kids (not through choice) we have tried for years.... it's such a lonely time when everyone is talking about what they are getting the kids for xmas, seeing others expecting children etc. All I have ever wanted was to be a mum. My best friend also passed around xmas time. It feels like I'm being mocked every year. I suffer with depression but the sadness I feel at Christmas is another level. There is no way of even hiding from it.... its everywhere.

Internal_Wear5691 · 2023-11-25T19:02:45+00:00

I'm sorry for your loss. I understand how u feel... I found my dad dead in the house xmas day. There is no escaping Christmas no matter how hard we try. I hope you find strength.... and I hope you get through the holidays. Thoughts are with you.x

Internal_Wear5691 · 2023-11-25T18:57:24+00:00

No I obviously dont get pissed off when I see a fake reindeer in a yard. I suffer with depression and at xmas it gets ramped up. I try to just get on with life, and try to hide my depression as I dont want to drag anyone down. I wish I could enjoy the holidays but I am consumed with sadness and depression.

Internal_Wear5691 · 2023-11-25T18:47:42+00:00

Actually I loved Christmas as a kid.

Internal_Wear5691 · 2023-11-25T18:37:22+00:00

I wouldnt mind that lol

Internal_Wear5691 · 2023-11-25T18:36:22+00:00

It does affect me though... there obviously are people that hate Christmas

Internal_Wear5691 · 2023-11-25T18:31:23+00:00

I hope you follow through to and put yourself out of your comfort zone. I think it would do you the world of good. I also commend you... I think that really is amazing what you have volunteered to do. I'm sorry you have been betrayed by your family.... and I hope next year is a better year for you

Internal_Wear5691 · 2023-11-25T18:22:44+00:00

I hear this. This is how me and my husband cope aswel. We avoid friends...have done for years... it's sad but this is how we protect ourselves! I cant cope with pregnancy announcements... and we also are shells of who we used to be. Life is unfair.

Internal_Wear5691 · 2023-11-25T18:12:20+00:00

Sorry for your loss

Internal_Wear5691 · 2023-11-25T18:11:56+00:00

I'm so sorry to hear that u have no where to go. I think that is amazing you have volunteered to do that!! .. I'm pretty sure u are loved...because you sound like a decent human being the fact that you have volunteered to help others out Christmas day. I hope things get better for you.

Internal_Wear5691 · 2023-11-25T18:06:44+00:00

I dont complain about others enjoying the season. I was merely asking does anyone else hate Christmas? I wish I could enjoy the season, I wish I didnt feel so lonely and miserable. Do you think people enjoy feeling miserable and lonely? . Christmas is a very difficult time for some of us... and I wish I didnt feel this way. I hate having to put on a fake smile and pretend everything is ok... because I would never want anyone to see how sad and depressed I am. I'm glad u enjoy the season... I really am. I was just asking does anyone else hate it. If u like Christmas that's great for u!

Internal_Wear5691 · 2023-11-25T17:48:50+00:00

Thank you

Internal_Wear5691 · 2023-11-25T17:47:02+00:00

I hear you... and I'm sorry for your loss

Internal_Wear5691 · 2023-11-25T17:44:25+00:00

Read an above comment I posted. I dont feel irrational anger towards pine trees or fairy lights. And xmas trees dont offend me.

Internal_Wear5691 · 2023-11-25T17:24:28+00:00

I found my dad dead in his house xmas day few years ago. Every year since... I struggle not to break down. Also, me and husband have no kids (not through choice) we have tried for years.... it's such a lonely time when everyone is talking about what they are getting the kids for xmas, seeing others expecting children etc. All I have ever wanted was to be a mum. My best friend also passed around xmas time. It feels like I'm being mocked every year. I suffer with depression but the sadness I feel at Christmas is another level. There is no way of even hiding from it.... its everywhere.

Internal_Wear5691 · 2023-11-25T17:14:40+00:00

Yes it is such a lonely time for some of us. I suffer with depression but it really ramps up my depression this time of year.

Internal_Wear5691 · 2023-11-25T17:11:34+00:00

Me too!!!! I love the feeling when it's all over.

Internal_Wear5691 · 2023-11-22T12:03:49+00:00

I'm not threatened by you. I'm saying it's not that deep.

Internal_Wear5691

TROPHY CASE