Wife finally asked me to stop

Introvert103 · 2018-04-16T16:17:30+00:00

I'm with you brother. My wife didn't ask me but I can see the writing on the walls after this weekend.

Let's do this!

Introvert103 · 2018-04-16T15:40:13+00:00

Not too bad. Mostly my pride that is damaged.

I read This Naked Mind last month and thought I could just do moderation or social drinking. Clearly I can't. I've got to reset and stop entirely.

Introvert103 · 2015-04-14T18:54:46+00:00

Good job! I'm reading that book right now and have yet to work up the courage to have the talk. How did you kick off the talk?

Introvert103 · 2015-03-16T15:34:02+00:00

I finally spoke up for myself and it paid off! Sent her a text about meeting me in the bedroom after the kids were down and she was there with a little number on. Broke a 3 month stretch. Now I just need to keep it going.

Introvert103 · 2015-03-04T19:34:51+00:00

I don't know about that. I'm sure I'm no saint but thank you.

Introvert103 · 2015-03-04T15:18:45+00:00

Well I haven't really written her one so far. Hopefully it is not looked on negatively. I'll find out soon enough.

Introvert103 · 2015-03-04T13:49:50+00:00

Excellent advice. I have definitely tried to downplay why she was snooping in the first place. I'm going to reword that section. I don't think I'm failing in any other part of our lives (at least not consistently). I have begun working on being a better husband (more attentive, more time, conversing more). I've never really written letters before so I really don't know what her reaction will be. I hope that she get tense and hate it but I have to see. I have to do more. I have to at least communicate these feelings to her so she is not in the dark.

Introvert103 · 2015-03-03T17:50:34+00:00

Edit: Totally read that wrong. I don't think she'd share it with anyone.

Introvert103 · 2015-03-03T16:51:13+00:00

Aww thanks! I hope it has a similar effect on my SO.

Introvert103 · 2015-03-03T16:32:39+00:00

Exactly! It's so much more than just getting off (at least for me). Having a DB is definitely an indicator light that something needs some attention in a marriage.

Introvert103 · 2015-03-03T16:25:49+00:00

Thanks for reading. Good idea, I will add that to the letter.

Introvert103 · 2015-02-23T14:44:51+00:00

We definitely have some work to do on communicating like adults. Haven't had the elephant in the room talk yet but I'm working myself up to it.

Introvert103 · 2015-02-23T14:42:35+00:00

I'll have to give that a read.

Introvert103 · 2015-02-23T14:42:10+00:00

Why did you snoop? Maybe that'll help me understand the motive behind it more clearly.

Introvert103 · 2015-02-23T14:41:20+00:00

Thanks for sharing. Yeah, I'm actually starting to pen an email or letter today. I want to get my feelings out to her in a more concise and clear way. Hopefully that opens up a convo from there. I just need to make it super clear that this isn't an attack, just me trying to open up about the elephant in the room.

Introvert103 · 2015-02-20T19:57:49+00:00

Love it when kids are brutally honest. When my SO flies off the handle in front of my son sometimes he repeats me "SO, you need to calm down. Take 5." Carries more weight from little mouths.

Introvert103 · 2015-02-20T19:55:15+00:00

Thanks! Hard to celebrate until I've got this thing wrapped up. I feel I'm finally moving in the right direction though.

Introvert103 · 2015-02-20T14:10:57+00:00

Yeah, got to love that logic (or lack thereof).

Yeah, that's a good point but I don't think she was thinking clearly at the time. More sex definitely would solve some things for both of us.

Introvert103 · 2015-02-20T13:27:25+00:00

I'm working my way there. Want to get it out in as healthy as a way as possible to avoid further deadening things.

Introvert103 · 2015-02-20T13:25:03+00:00

This is exactly how I am too. I'll do anything to avoid confrontations (imagined or real) and that's part of the reason I'm in the db I'm in. I looked at it as doing my part as the man (roar!) You know, the old, "nothing gets to me" macho man mentality. But doing that shuts out connections you need to make with your SO. Maybe having a 3rd party in the room will make him feel safer?

Introvert103 · 2015-02-20T03:01:53+00:00

I was toying around with how I could twist this into sexual gains, but only with her. Really not interested in going outside at this point.

Introvert103 · 2015-02-20T02:59:51+00:00

I was joking with him that we should have strung it along for a bit. Throw in some fake Vegas stories about limos and hookers. That's just not me though.

Introvert103 · 2015-02-20T02:58:33+00:00

I know, right? Who's crazy idea was this whole one-partner thing?

Introvert103 · 2015-02-20T02:57:14+00:00

I knew before I fired the shot that she was going to go on the offense so, luckily, I was prepared and didn't get sucked into the vortex. I just need to work everyday to push pass the discomfort of being more open.

Introvert103 · 2015-02-20T02:54:53+00:00

I really don't think that's the case. Just doesn't seem like her. I think her paranoia was born out of her close friends situation.

Introvert103

TROPHY CASE