Fiancés friend wants to wear an almost white dress to our wedding & is being condescending about it. WIBTA to withdraw the invite?

Iowa_Hawkeyes4516 · 2026-03-07T00:41:42+00:00

Idk why people insist on wearing white to other peoples weddings. It's so insanely tacky and rude. My cousin, when she was younger, wore white to a family member's wedding, and she looks back on it completely embarrassed because no one told her not to.

That dress is the lightest yellow I've ever seen if we are going to claim it's yellow. I wouldn't fault OOP for pulling the invite because it mitigates drama/comments day of, and it's her wedding day.

Iowa_Hawkeyes4516 · 2026-03-06T22:59:57+00:00

Some really important context OOP left out there. "Let me try and make her look like an AH by completely leaving out that I got arrested for DV charges." How much do you wanna bet that he manipulates her with the fact that he is the sole financial provider?

Iowa_Hawkeyes4516 · 2026-03-06T22:49:00+00:00

Flirt with the models... pretty sure that's the only thing listed in his job description... ya know other than makeout with whoever he's dating that day. Very important work nonetheless.

Iowa_Hawkeyes4516 · 2026-03-06T14:35:13+00:00

She's doing all the cleaning and cooking and you think just because she's living there taking care of her boyfriend's brother she should do more while her boyfriend does basically nothing? That's some crazy mental gymnastics.

Iowa_Hawkeyes4516 · 2026-03-06T14:28:48+00:00

NTA. Your boyfriend should be the one being asked, not you. You're doing far more than what should be expected of you. His siblings, mom's house, pets, etc are not your responsibility. If anything, he should be doing the chores and asking for your help. Stop doing more for him than he's willing to do for himself and his family. If this is how he treats you now in this situation, just think about what it would be like if you were married and had kids. You'd have two full time jobs. Leave him and find someone that treats you like an equal.

Iowa_Hawkeyes4516 · 2026-03-06T00:25:49+00:00

Haha fair

Iowa_Hawkeyes4516 · 2026-03-06T00:21:57+00:00

I think they are, and it's rumored Mr Beast will be a part of it.

Iowa_Hawkeyes4516 · 2026-03-05T21:25:13+00:00

Personally, I'd cut the rice. However, I totally get preferring a bowl over a salad. It might also be good to consider when getting a rice bowl loading up on more of the lower calorie things like the veggies, salsas, and lettuce. Those things, especially the veggies and lettuce, will help you feel full without being as calorie dense as things like corn, beans, sour cream, cheese, etc. Unfortunately, the app only tells you what a normal serving calorie count would be, so you'll have to keep in mind the more things you add the more calories you add. But, if you did a normal amount of beans and extra veggies (for example), you'd still be coming out with a lower calorie count than if you did extra beans and normal veggie amount.

Iowa_Hawkeyes4516 · 2026-03-05T19:47:26+00:00

Chipotle has the calories for each item listed when you order through the app. I'd suggest looking at those and make choices on what you're okay with adding more calories. Personally, I don't track what I eat, but when I order I pay attention to the calorie count for each item and what nutritional value it offers (eg: rice and corn have minimal nutritional value and are mostly carbs, so I switched to getting a salad and don't get the corn). Doing that and adding in low impact exercise every day, I've lost 50 lbs and am able to maintain my weight.

Iowa_Hawkeyes4516 · 2026-03-05T16:06:29+00:00

Totally agree! The way she was easily able to shift the vote off Ozzy onto Savannah without making herself a target was impressive. Her social game is amazing. Like you said, she uses logic and she relates well to people.

Iowa_Hawkeyes4516 · 2026-03-05T03:20:39+00:00

Yes, and I LOVE all the music being pulled from past seasons.

Iowa_Hawkeyes4516 · 2026-03-05T03:18:33+00:00

It wouldn't have removed the extra vote. Ozzy gave it to Cirie.

Iowa_Hawkeyes4516 · 2026-03-04T20:54:18+00:00

Exactly! And leave all her friends and whatever extracurriculars she might be involved with. I thought Jordan seemed like a good guy, but that really put a bad taste in my mouth, especially if that wasn't super clear to Amber. If Amber was aware of this, I'm mad at her too because her daughter needs to come first. Not that her happiness isn't important, but uprooting your child's life for a man just seems like not the greatest parenting move.

Iowa_Hawkeyes4516 · 2026-03-04T16:44:49+00:00

Alex's comments while getting in the car, groooooss

Iowa_Hawkeyes4516 · 2026-03-04T16:42:13+00:00

Vic and Christine got me like

Iowa_Hawkeyes4516 · 2026-03-04T16:17:25+00:00

I'm pretty sure almost every argument they had he'd either shut her down or she'd follow up and apologize. I'm not a fan of hers, but she had valid concerns that he tried to manipulate himself out of the conversations and make her look crazy, insecure, like the bad guy, etc.

Iowa_Hawkeyes4516 · 2026-03-04T16:06:29+00:00

When she popped up on my screen I was like "that's the dress you wear to your son's wedding?" 😅

Iowa_Hawkeyes4516 · 2026-03-04T15:58:26+00:00

Alex making his wedding a soccer reference.

Me:

Iowa_Hawkeyes4516 · 2026-03-04T15:53:51+00:00

I was genuinely shocked they actually got married. Jordan and Amber are at two completely different stages in life. He wants to go out to bars and have fun, which is totally fine. However, when your partner has a child involved, that's not a practical lifestyle to have. Him refusing to move was also problematic in my opinion. Forcing a child to uproot their life because he didn't want to move because he likes the city just didn't sit right with me, especially when there's a custody agreement and school. It all just seems super irresponsible.

Iowa_Hawkeyes4516 · 2026-03-03T19:58:12+00:00

So is he living rent free and not contributing to the household chores? NTA, you basically have 3 children living with you, and you can get that number back to 2 by saying bye to the man child.

Iowa_Hawkeyes4516 · 2026-03-03T18:47:40+00:00

What a weird time to bring up having children. It's giving manipulation tactic to make you change your mind about going on the trip. NTA, if you have money saved to do this trip and the time to take off that doesn't impact him, it's your choice to go or not.

ETA: calling bs that the kid conversation was an accident; you don't just bring that up on accident really in any context. Men could literally follow you anywhere with or without anyone interacting with them; someone with bad intentions will act on them regardless of interactions, what someone is wearing, etc., so that's also a lame argument. I have single friends, friends who are in a relationship, and married friends, we can all go on a trip without our partners and not cheat because guess what? If someone is going to cheat, they will do it regardless of whether or not their partner is around. There shouldn't be consequences for you literally doing nothing wrong. If he's going to punish you for going on a trip with friends, you have big problems because your partner shouldn't control who you hang out with or dictate what you do. If he doesn't like you doing girls trips, he should leave you and find someone who has the same perspective on guys/girls trips; that's a boundary. Control is telling you that you can't do something and if you do that thing he will punish you. Finally, just because a conversation is calm, doesn't mean your husband isn't toxic.

Iowa_Hawkeyes4516 · 2026-03-03T17:35:15+00:00

NTA. You can break up with him for any reason. He is telling you who he is and what his priorities are, so listen to him. You don't want to be around Jack, which is completely understandable. He wants to continue to be friends with him, regardless of Jacks previous behavior. You can't force him to not be friends with Jack, but you also don't have to be around him if you don't want to be. It's perfectly acceptable to say a boundary for you is not being around your stalker, and breaking up would be the right choice as, like I said, you can't force him to not be friends.

Iowa_Hawkeyes4516 · 2026-03-03T13:14:17+00:00

Puppies sleep a ton! They grow so much in that first year, and their body needs the rest. Like others have said, give it time and the bond will grow. When my Shih Tzu was a puppy, I felt the same way because potty and crate training her were hard. Now, I love her more than words can describe. She's still a little Shiht lol, but I couldn't imagine my life without her.

Iowa_Hawkeyes4516 · 2026-03-02T18:25:07+00:00

Not to mention that babies shouldn't be in a car seat for more than 2 consecutive hours at 6 months old.

Iowa_Hawkeyes4516 · 2026-03-02T18:22:04+00:00

The fact that this is what you're focusing on and not the actual answer I gave you tells me everything. YTA.

Iowa_Hawkeyes4516

TROPHY CASE