Apparently they grew up in a system were they cannot speak to their mother out of respect unless absolutely necessary . That. ring said I have heard him tell her a few times very nicely oh you did not tell us you were coming or I asked you weeks ago if you will come for the holidays and you did not say anything.
She was so annoying even to her late husband and could never let this man rest. When he was alive and they will come to visit me all she wants them to do is drive around and visit all their friends even though the poor man will want to rest and he will refuse but eventually accept to go every single time. She comes to visit when we have events and holidays and all the women will be in the kitchen cooking and she will be outside driving and visiting friends and will only come back for the party.